Self-Review – Breakout… and Then What?

Let’s Look at Breakout… and Then What?

For this short story about a breakout from an alien prison, I harkened back to some old World War II prison break films. And, I got to thinking about the mechanics of it. Consider this: unlike in the Second World War, there’s no one who is sympathetic, willing to hide you.

There’s no way for you to truly blend in with the rest of the populace, even if you speak their language fluently. And it would be hard to appeal to someone’s sense of kinship or decency.

After all, at this stage in human development, what sort of kinship could we possibly ever have with an alien race?

I wrote this story during the first quarter of 2021.

Background for Breakout… and Then What?

Prison break films, regardless of when they were made, tend to follow a relatively set formula. A person is imprisoned, often unjustly. In order to get out, they nearly always tunnel. This means taking care of certain necessities such as getting rid of a lot of dirt.

Once they are out, if they can, they do whatever is possible to blend in with the people in the closest town. This is done with varying degrees of success. Plus, the escapee(s) are hunted by their captors. Recapture and return (if those things happen at all) is not always on screen.

A few exceptions to this formula are Victory, a Sly Stallone film, where he and his comrades escape after a soccer game. Another is Stalag 17, where the escapees get out via wire cutters.

So, I had a framework already in place.

The original plot word was peninsula.

Plot for Breakout… and Then What?

Apart from the difficulty of being able to blend in, my characters would have a number of strikes against them. This meant that the time covered is rather long, much like in The Shawshank Redemption.

But I started with a simple premise that the main character would be imprisoned but will have been told a lie. Uncovering this lie and understanding how to use this information, is most of the plot.

Characters

The characters are the unnamed narrator and her cellmate, Terri. There are various guards, but she only refers to them obliquely.

Memorable Quotes for the Breakout

When I was brought here, I was told this place was an island, and there could be no escape from it.

Well, being a skeptical sort of person, I did whatever I could to see the other side of the wall. I tunneled when I could. And I also set myself up to be a model prisoner. Eventually, the warden allowed me to be a trustee. I could go to the nearby town and work for a pittance at some miserable job or another.

The people there speak an utterly unfamiliar tongue. They aren’t even human, so I can’t hide among them. At least, not in plain sight. But I’ve got eyes and ears, and so I’ve taken to learning as much as I can of their language, culture, and gestures.

I’ve said nothing to any of my fellow human prisoners. You never know who might turn informant.

Genre and Overall Mood

The genre is science fiction prison break. The mood is cautiously optimistic, particularly at the end.

Breakout the Rating

The story has a K rating.

Takeaways for Breakout …and Then What?

I like the way this one turned out, for the most part. But right now, it just feels very unfinished. So, maybe I will pick it up again. In particular, if I shoehorn it into the Ziranqui war universe, then I’ll need to add more detail.

A lot more detail. Because someone will be asking, then what happened next? I would need to be able to answer that, don’t you think?

Want More of my Short Stories and Novellas?

If this story resonates with you, then I hope you will check out some of my other blog posts about my shorter works.

And finally, for a complete list of my shorter works, please be sure to check out the Hub Page—Short Stories.