Self-Review – The Playback

It is Time to Look at The Playback

So, one thing about The Playback is it is the kind of story I rarely write any more. While I love lyrics and they can often inspire, this one seems a little too on the nose.

I wrote this story during the third quarter of 2017. It was originally for a third Stardust, Always anthology to fight cancer. However, that book never materialized.

Welcome to Developmental Hell.

Background

I am pretty sure that I was thinking about the old Crash Test Dummies song, Afternoons and Coffeespoons when I first wrote this one.

In particular, there is a line:
Maybe if I could do a play-by-playback
I could change the test results that I will get back

And so, I realized, there was the potential for almost a time travel story in that little piece of the lyrics.

Plot

On her death bed, the narrator speaks to a doctor about a wish to save her nephew. According to the narrator, this conversation has occurred several times before. Why?

Because the narrator has perfected a form of time travel, and has been working through numerous iterations to save her nephew. The nephew has a glioblastoma. This nasty form of cancer figures in another of my stories.

But to reveal too much would go heavily into spoiler territory.

Characters

The characters are the narrator and her doctor, and the people in the narrator’s life who she mentions. But she is the only one who does any talking.

Memorable Quotes

I know you think I’m on my deathbed, Doctor, but I’m not. I mean, I am, but I can fix this. I’ll start from the beginning.

Yes, yes, I know I sound like any of however many other crazy, sick old ladies in this hospital. I get that – I do! But I also know that, underneath your lab coat, you’re wearing a blue blouse with a red ink stain.

Don’t look so shocked. And don’t try to tell yourself you showed it to me. I mean, you did. But not today. Not in this version of today.

Yes, I mean version. Because, you see, I can play back my life.

Genre and Overall Mood for The Playbook

This story is in the science fiction genre. The mood is somewhat neutral, as you cannot tell if it is going to be positive in the end.

Rating for The Playback

The story has a K rating.

Takeaways from The Playback

I really like the idea behind this one. It is simple and straightforward.

However, there are definitely a few flaws with this one. One is that it ends on a cliffhanger and with no real resolution. Most likely, I was trying to add a Twilight Zone vibe to the story.

But it does not truly succeed in that area. Rather, the attempt just falls flat.

Another flaw (which may not really be a flaw, as I think about it) is that the method of time travel is extremely basic. Still, that could be an advantage here.

Since the narrator tries to get the doctor to help her, the only way that can make any sense at all is to have the method be exceptionally easy.

This way, the narrator can comfortably ask the doctor to learn the technique. It also works well in the context of a short story. In a far longer piece, the methodology of time travel could have become a lot more complex.

Although for the doctor to be able to realistically learn the method in less than an hour, it does make sense for it to be a ridiculously simply matter to learn.

Argh, I am so conflicted!

So, imagine how my readers must feel. Hmm.

Want More of my Short Stories and Novellas?

If this story resonates with you, then I hope you will check out some of my other blog posts about my shorter works.

And finally, for a complete list of my shorter works, please be sure to check out the Hub Page—Short Stories.