Self Review – All My Aliens
All My Aliens?
This was a story originally created for a competition. But it also came from a very wacky idea I had had several years previously.
The concept was, how would First Contact happen? And so I hit upon a very strange way to do it.
Because TV is more important to many of us than we would care to admit, the idea was a simple one.
My aliens would have to originally contact us on television. And, even better, it would have to be via the medium of fiction. But what would be the best means of doing this? After all, TV shows are cancelled all the time.
And then I hit upon the more or less perfect answer.
And so the idea was born – my aliens would make contact with us via the soaps.
My Aliens: the Characters
The characters are not of this earth, of course. The only two who really get names are Chaz and Katherinemma. Katherinemma got her name because Alyssa Milano had (at the time) recently named her daughter Elizabella. So K got her name as a kind of homage to that.
And Chaz, of course, was the most typical and obvious male soap star name we could think of.
Some of my favorite parts of this story are how the action zooms from the strangers thinking about contacting Earth to the stars getting here. And then, of course, they have to get to Area 51 (because, reasons). And, of course, the daytime Emmy awards.
No good soap opera would ever be complete without a dramatic scene with a slap. No good story about celebrities would ever be complete without some crazed fan screaming about having her idol’s baby. And no good science fiction yarn would ever be complete without something with tentacles.
Fortunately, the story has all of that.
It also has what, I feel, is perhaps the funniest ending line I have ever written.
All My Aliens is probably a K when you get right down to it.
You can find it in the Longest Night Watch II, if I recall correctly.
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