Have you ever written a blurb for a book? Here’s how.
Grab the Reader’s Attention
The most effective blurbs are:
specific as to genre (don’t be coy; if it’s horror, then say so!)
open about who the protagonist is
not a rehash of the first chapter or the entire plot
neutral about the quality of your work (don’t say: this is an incredible book. Your saying that does not make it so. Sorry.)
So keep in mind – these are not the same as the summary you write for a query.
In this fantasy tale, Dorothy is whisked away by a twister to an unknown magical land. But first she has to deal with the quite literal fallout of her house falling on, and killing, a wicked witch.
Blurbs give us an idea about the story, and they make us want to read more. Also, a blurb for The Wizard of Oz would likely be longer than the above, better reflecting the work’s complexity and length. While a long book does not need to have a long blurb, it at least could conceivably support one. However, a short novel probably would not. Unless, of course, you’ve written The Great Gatsby or To Kill a Mockingbird.
Reclusive millionaire Jay Gatsby leads the good life in 1920s New York. As his friend Nick Carraway watches, Gatsby’s life takes a turn with the all-too appealing but also all-too married Daisy Buchanan.
Scout and Jem Finch live in Alabama with their widowed father, Atticus, the town’s leading lawyer. It’s the 1930s, and Maycomb seems far from sophistication or enlightenment. And so the trouble starts when a black man is accused of raping a white woman – and Scout’s father agrees to defend the accused.
I enjoy fanfiction as much as, perhaps, the next person. But you still can never, ever charge for it. I implore you: don’t even try.
Seriously, put it out of your mind.
But aren’t there exceptions?
Yes, there are some. But first, let’s talk about why fan fiction is problematic.
Issues With This Form of Expression
For writers like you and me – and Stephen King and JK Rowling as well – we prepare our own universes. Some universes are familiar and take any number of real-life elements. For example, King’s The Stand mainly takes place in more or less present-day America. King does not run into any copyright issues with New York City being New York City. Other places in the book, though, are more the product of his imagination. In Rowling’s Harry Potter universe, though, a lot more of the scene is dreamt up by her.
For both authors, and for countless others, originality consists of creating a universe, creating characters, devising a plot, and then executing the plot in some fashion.
In fan fiction, another person (or persons) created the universe and the characters. Even when the fanficcer adds characters, the fictional world remains the original author’s creation. Hence one of the main issues with fan fiction is that it keeps the fanficcer from learning how to do that.
Benefits of Fanfiction
It’s not all bad, of course. The biggest and most measurable benefit is that it keeps you writing. Creativity is often sparked by simply being creative, that is, you write five or seven days per week, and you can fill up that writing time fairly readily. But if you only write three times per month, you may find you have writers’ block when you make the infrequent attempt. There is something about the pressure of deadlines or at least the pressure of your own internal expectations. It helps to not have a blank page to stare at all the time.
There is nothing whatsoever wrong with borrowing another’s universe in order to keep writing and exercising the creativity muscle.
If you first wrote in someone else’s universe, and now you want to claim your own, you may be transitioning from fanfiction.
Going from fan fiction writing to wholly original writing
It’s more than just ‘filing off a few serial numbers’.
How writing fanfiction can help you
It teaches you how to follow continuity. It can keep you writing when you’re stuck. Writing begets more writing (even fan fiction!), so it pays to keep going. You are better off, in terms of preventing writer’s block, to just keep on writing. Hence, if all else fails, go with fan fiction. Of course there are plenty of places to post it online. Here’s one.
How writing fanfiction can hurt you
It does not teach you how to make your own world, and it can hamper your growth in this area. Furthermore, if you are not used to making your own characters, it can hurt you there, as well.
Flip Your Perception
So consider what the foundational IP (intellectual property) does, and why it matters to you as you start the process of transitioning.
Interesting stories – spend some time deconstructing your favorites. Where did the writers hand-wave a problem away? Also, where did they get confusing? In addition, where did they deliver on the promise of their teaser/preview?
Compelling characters – why do the canon characters matter to you? Again, engage in some deconstruction. Forget who plays a character. So consider how you would feel about a character if someone else played them. Furthermore, consider how you would feel if the character’s gender and/or sexuality were swapped. Would you feel different if the character was of a race different from the current actor’s? Be your own casting director. Who, living or dead, could play the role better?
Fascinating scenes – even within a familiar place, commercial intellectual property exists inside its own bucket. It might be a city block, a hospital, a car driving across the country, or somewhere else. What would happen if the scene shifted? Does the work succeed if it moves from Milwaukee to San Diego to Angkor Wat?
Action-driving plots – what kicks things off? If it’s a television program, what happened during the pilot? Did someone new move in? Did someone lose their job? Have a wedding? Have a kid? Graduate? Get arrested? Would the storyline still work if the pilot was different?
Believable effects, makeup, costumes, lighting, scenery, etc. – technology is a part of onscreen fiction writing. New techniques are constantly being invented, as studios save money but also enhance believability. What happens if an older show or film gets new makeup and green screening? Does that help the story, or harm it?
Blaze Your Own Trail
For every exciting intellectual property out there, whether it’s books, films, YouTube videos, TV programs, or something else, it all started somewhere.
So what is your story? Who are your characters?
Who knows? Maybe someday someone will want to write fan fiction about your work.
Reviewing – Bad Reviews – lousy reviews are tough to write! However, you need to write the occasional less than wonderful review in order to establish and maintain credibility. Not every novel is a stellar one. Not every effort is perfect and pristine.
This blog post is about reviewing badly-written works. But if a work is out and out plagiarized, then have at it. That’s just plain wrong, and it may be copyright infringement.
Soothing Hurt Feelings and Maintaining the Relationship
Let’s face it. A less than glowing review is going to engender some hurt feelings. Plus there is every possibility a friendship will end over it. That’s not someone being a prima donna (at least, that isn’t necessarily the case). Rather, it’s that you just told someone their baby was ugly.
Yeah. It’s like that.
So, what do you do?
I believe one reasonable response is to essentially perform a cost-benefit analysis. Not everyone is a critic of any sort. Consider how hard it is to get your own work reviewed at all. It’s work! And people like to be pleasant, plus they want very much to be liked. They may be a part of the community and hoping for positive feedback in return. Or they might be friends or family. Hence we are all essentially graded on a curve. Know that going in.
One thing you can do is, delay and defer. Maybe that’s weasel behavior. But it will soften the blow if the negative review is not the first one anyone sees when researching a book. If someone already has 100 reviews, then it won’t be quite so noticeable. Of course, lots of indie writers never get that many reviews. But you might be able to delay a bit.
Another idea is to go fast. Detail and length are not your friends here, so make it quick.
Consider the Audience
I suggested this for middling reviews. But it holds true here as well. Who is likely to read your review? If the writers asks you to review on Amazon, then you are going to rather directly affect someone’s sales and potential sales. If you are being asked to review on an obscure book blog read by sixteen people, then the impact will not be as great. Plus you can initially post your negative review only on the obscure book blog. Once the writer sees the review, I doubt he or she will push for you to share it on Amazon, GoodReads, CreateSpace, Barnes & Noble, or iBooks.
Providing Constructive Criticism
While this is a good idea in theory, it’s not really what someone is looking for when they request a book review. Instead, rather than hearing that they should learn dialogue tags by checking out this Grammar Girl link, they want to read about how their book moved you.
However, you still might be able to slip in some constructive criticisms, and write things like I would love to see this book with shorter chapters; it might benefit from another round of edits or some strategic splitting. Or I was hoping for a less challenging mystery. This one was hard. You’re not damning with faint praise but you’re also not putting lipstick on things.
A Few Escape Hatches
Preface a bad review with some escape hatches which will help the writer. After all, you’re not there to trash them, right? Here are a few ideas:
I am not the intended audience for this work or genre. – If you’re over 50 and asked to review YA, you probably aren’t in the intended audience. Maybe younger folks would be big fans.
The work is unique. – Unless it’s plagiarized, this is honest and accurate.
It is a good freshman effort. – This is straying into the realm of damning with faint praise. But it’s not a horrible thing to write about a work. Most people are not going to do well with their first novel. And that’s okay.
I really liked this one thing and think you should have written a lot more of it. – Liked one of the supporting characters? Enchanted by the setting? Think the plot was a good idea but poorly realized? Then this is for you. Of course you are not rewriting the piece for the writer. But your suggestions might just become helpful plot bunnies for them for later. Maybe they really will write a sequel or prequel, or revisit the scene, or rework the plot in another piece.
Salvaging the Relationship by Privately Reviewing
You might be able to save things by privately telling someone – you don’t want me to post this review. There are review sites which will do this, and will often give the writer a choice. If a writer really wants reviews, they might be okay with a less than wonderful one.
You are presumably friendly or at least cordial with the writer. Give them a break and give them the option.
By the way, negative reviews can often help a new writer. Not only do they give the writer what could end up being really valuable feedback, they can even boost sales. For consumers considering taking a chance on a new, unknown author, a rash of 5-star super-perfect reviews can seem suspect. But a few poor reviews can give the whole thing more credibility,
How about Bad Reviews for Famous People?
If you only write 4- and 5-star reviews, then you are probably selling everyone short. Just like bad reviews can give a writer more credibility, they can also give the reviewer more credibility.
But if you don’t want to hurt your friends’ feelings, what do you do?
One idea is to review all sorts of books. Review classics where the writer is long dead. Or review popular works with hundreds or thousands of reviews where no one will notice your review much, anyway. Did you hate reading The Scarlet Letter? Then go ahead and trash it on any review site you can find.
It’s not like Nathaniel Hawthorne is going to rise from the grave and complain, right?
Reviewing – Middling Reviews – fair to middling reviews are harder to write. Because there is definitely a skill involved. But you are probably going to write more of them than any other type of review. Why? Because truly superlative works are uncommon.
As always, kindness should be your guide. The work isn’t out and out awful. It just needs some help. Mid-level reviews can be extremely helpful. They can provide valuable feedback for a new author. Because it is sweetened with praise and other positives, it is more palatable.
Consider the Audience
But who is most likely to read your review? If you review on Amazon, then anything you write is going to rather directly affect someone’s sales and potential sales. If you review on an obscure book blog read by only a few people, then the impact will not be as great. So what happens if you post your middle of the road review only on the obscure book blog? Once the writer sees the review, he or she might not want to push for you to share it on Amazon, GoodReads, CreateSpace, Barnes & Noble, or iBooks. Or maybe the author will want to see your review spread all over the internet. It’s hard to say. Your mid-level review may be the best one they get.
The value of middle of the line reviews
For a new author, potential buyers are often suspicious of 100% stellar reviews. Hence if the 5-star reviews are peppered with some 3-stars, then potential buyers tend to feel more comfortable that they are seeing accurate reviews that were not bought and paid for. Furthermore, if the author has enough reviews (the number seems to be ten or more), Amazon will sort them by most helpful positive and most helpful negative. If your middle of the road review is the most helpful negative review, that can actually help the writer.
So, how do you get started?
The Shit Sandwich
Yeah, you read that right. Since this is not going to be a wholly negative review, you can split it into thirds. This makes it feel less unremittingly negative. The first third should be the smallest or smaller positive thing you have to say. In the middle is the negative thing you need to say. Finally, end with your strongest positive.
But why am I suggesting this particular order? Let’s look at some examples.
Consider these examples
The Cowardly Lion character was fantastic and very credible. The Tin Woodsman was dull. Dorothy was okay.
The Dorothy character was all right but could have used some work. The Tin Woodsman was hard to take at times. My favorite character was the Cowardly Lion.
The Tin Woodsman was terrible. Dorothy was passable. The Cowardly Lion was amazing.
In the first example, you might think it’s a purely positive review. It’s easy to forget the negative in the middle when the positive starts off so strongly. In the third example, the writer is put on the defensive nearly immediately. The review feels negative, even though the end is positive.
Further, in the second instance, the first part is generally positive albeit with constructive criticism. The middle part is negative. But it gives a specific reason for the reviewer’s negative reaction. This is also something the writer could potentially build on and fix in later works. And the final part adds a positive personal touch.
Of course you would never write such a simplistic review. Plus you are reading this blog but you are not the author of The Wizard of Oz, so these quickie reviews are not personal to you. So substitute your own work, and consider how each review would make you feel.
Because this is not a negative review, you can add some length to it. But because it’s not unremittingly positive, it does not have to be lengthy. The ideal length is about 50 to 100 words. If you want to say more, contact the writer in private. For self-published works, editing and republishing are usually pretty easy. Hence if you find a glaring translation error, the writer can fix it. You can save the day with your review.
Ending on a High Note
End with a positive. Seriously. Don’t lie, but there is no reason to be nasty. Be encouraging; so many indies suffer self-doubt. This is your opportunity to be kind. After all, next time, you may be in the hot seat.
Reviewing – Positive Reviews – these are the lifeblood of any independent author. We live for them! But how can you make them even better?
Don’t provide a positive review in exchange for a positive one you just got. And don’t provide one in the hopes that you’ll get one in return. Personally, I very rarely give out five stars. A book has to truly leave me sock-free. I can enjoy a book immensely but still not give it five stars. However, I give out a lot of 3- and 4-star reviews, particularly to indie authors. And if my review is a positive one, I spread it to as many places as I can.
Just saying you loved a piece is not enough. It’s better than nothing, of course. But you, too, are a writer. You can do better than that! While you don’t have to hit an actual word count, it is more helpful if you give the review some time and attention. Naturally, if you are pressed for time or you have to do a lot of reviews, then you will not get into things like you would if your time was more open. Plus it does not have to be a novel. A 50 – 150 word review should do nicely, unless it is a blog post. In that case, best practices for blog posts is 300 or more words. So adjust accordingly.
Writers often get crippling self-doubt. Imposter syndrome is common. Generalized reviews don’t help much. Be clear about what you loved.
Scarlet O’Hara was a strong female character in a man’s world. What is most impressive about her is the fact that she was written in 1936. Hence Margaret Mitchell was almost revolutionary in writing her. While today we might scoff at some of Scarlet’s machinations, she still manages to be a memorable and memorably flawed character. Her motivations are clear and logical. Her endgame is satisfying.
While the author is no longer alive to read my praise, the paragraph still gets across my admiration for the work (I do, for real, like the book, although it’s not one of my absolute favorites). This is also a meatier review than just “It’s great!” The review does not just make the writer feel good; it also provides vital information for potential readers.
Please don’t give away the ending! My above review snippet about Gone With the Wind does not give away the ending. In fact, it gives away just about none of the plot at all. I would write a longer review (the above bit is really just a part of it) where I would probably mention the US Civil War and Rhett Butler. I might get into Ashley Wilkes and Melanie Hamilton, particularly if I were writing a blog post and needed to make word count.
Spread the Love
There are several online places which take reviews.
Amazon reviews most directly affect a writer’s sales and potential sales. If you provide positive reviews on an obscure book blog read by only a few people, then the impact will not be as great. You can also review on other countries’ versions of Amazon (UK, Canada, etc.), GoodReads, CreateSpace, Barnes & Noble, or iBooks.
Call to Action to Read the Author’s Other Works
A call to action is anything from ‘click here’ to ‘buy this’. It is a statement online whereby you are asking someone to do something. It does not have to feel like a hard sell. Instead, you can write things like:
This book was fun and I can’t wait to see what else the writer has written.
I hear there is a sequel and I can’t wait.
I checked out the writer’s Amazon page (provide the link) and they are blogging there. I’m excited to read what they have to say.
So, can you tell the difference between someone from the Bronx and someone from Brooklyn? And what about Chicago versus Detroit? Or Swedish versus Norwegian? YouTube has a number of videos about speech and speaking details; just conduct a search. However, I caution you that the information is not always correct. Hence, listen to several videos and try to split the difference, unless you know for certain where the speaker hails from. Because sometimes a person is just trying to practice or mimic the way others speak and they don’t always do such a great job of that.
Respecting the Speakers
If your southern American characters sound like Gomer Pyle, and your Mexican characters sound like Señor Wences, you are probably not doing such a hot job with depicting their accents. Same with a British character who ends up sounding like Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins. Just, don’t.
Furthermore, areas of the world have variations when it comes to speaking. And it’s not just with word choice (e. g. Bostonians call a sandwich on a long roll a grinder whereas that same sandwich is a po’boy in New Orleans and a sub in New York City); it also has to do with sounds. Brooklynites tend to broaden their vowels and can often drop an ending g or an r. For example, a Brooklynite from the area called “East New York” (such as my own mother) will call Barbey Street “Bobby Street”. Yes, really – true story – I didn’t know the correct name of the street my mother grew up on until we went there and I saw the street sign for the first time.
In addition, a county does not have to be as large as the United States for there to be differences in speech. England is notorious for this. Go to Liverpool and they speak far differently from how people speak in Cornwall.
Be sure to listen to people who have the accents you want to write about. Do so in person if you can, or at least online with a reliable source. And particularly pay attention to how people say the name of the place they come from. Finally, respect accents and don’t automatically assign intelligence or stupidity based upon them.
TV shows can be a great source of inspiration. And they can go beyond TV Tropes and even into something (almost, let’s not kid ourselves, folks) profound. So, what do I mean?
For the most part, we see three kinds of television programs:
And then they subdivide, e. g. comedy divides into sketch shows like Saturday Night Live, or sitcoms like Will and Grace, or most cartoons. And drama divides into genres such as police procedurals, westerns, etc. Furthermore, reality television is really drama, by the way. And finally nonfiction comprises the news and documentaries, but also educational programming for children. While a few potential outliers (such as music videos), or hybrid programs with both drama and comedy (e. g. Desperate Housewives) exist, most shows hit one of the big three categories.
Because everyone is inspired differently, consider how fan fiction grabs you. Very often, you watch a program but feel it’s incomplete. Or you might want a different ending or to gender swap the characters. By doing this with all television, and not just your own personal fandom, you can garner a ton of inspiration. Naturally, you need to stay out of copyright infringement territory. However, there’s no copyright on basic ideas, just on their execution. Consider all the fish out of water comedies. Or think of episodes with people caught in a freezer. They exist because those situations work. And all the writers do is add a different spin on it all.
In addition, consider the characters and their portrayers. Why is a character of African descent? Is it because they are having authentic experiences, or an attempt at diversity, or is it tokenism? When Jewish characters (for example) are on the screen, does the audience get more than an occasion reference to Chanukah? Or do they just get a surname, or a trope? Are LGBTQ characters defined by their sexuality, or are they stereotyped, or is it no big deal? And look at the smart characters, the dumb ones, and the evil ones. Do characters have any sort of depth at all?
You can get great inspiration from television viewing. Look at shows with a critical eye and consider how you’d improve or change them. Mash them up and make these ideas your own.
So Cynthia is a fun although ultimately sad story.
You see, Cynthia is a Great Dane.
And to her sorrow, her master is succumbing to Alzheimer’s. This short story was written for the second volume of The Longest Night Watch. All of the proceeds go to the Alzheimer’s Association.
I love the canine point of view. There is just something about writing about a species that is so incredibly close to us yet their ‘language’, such as it is, is vastly different.
Furthermore, dogs experience so much more than we do when it comes to scent that their perceptions have to be rendered in that manner.
I have always been a dog lover, and I have some fan fiction where the POV comes from a canine perspective. As a result, I had the itch to write something similar yet wholly original.
The plot is small and compact, and it reflects how Daniel’s life is shrinking in on itself. The dog even says that there is more food when Keisha arrives, and the walks are longer. You don’t need to be human to know that Daniel is faltering. Because this status quo will change, and the center will not hold.
The characters are the narrator, Cynthia the dog, Daniel Robinson, her owner, and Daniel’s daughter, Keisha. However, we only see Keisha at the end, although there is a mentioning of her before.
I love him.
He smells good.
The story is Rated K.
Canine POV, as I noted above, is great fun to write. But the story is truly a sad one. For Keisha in particular, her father is slipping away. And even though she’s a nurse, she can do nothing to slow down or stop his decline.
Life events can be extremely inspiring for writers.
They can range from baby showers to quinceañeras. Or they might be religious commitment ceremonies like confirmations.
Weddings and Marriages are a special case
I’ll cover weddings and marriages at a later date. They generally entail much greater pageantry.
Intimacy versus Spectacle
First off, you should notice how big the event is. Is it a small one-year-old’s birthday party for just the immediate family? Or is it a Bat Mitzvah for a few hundred guests, where the parents satisfy several social obligations at once?
Because a very large event can be overwhelming, try to concentrate on smaller conversations. Check out the little moments. What happens when the cake is cut, or the music starts? Of course you don’t ignore a crying baby. And you don’t interrupt important family moments. But we all know that there can be delays and quiet times during these sorts of events.
There is usually an organization behind very large events. Sometimes a professional handles everything. Or instead there might be a sequence of operations. The family is introduced first. Or first the hosts mingle with the guests. Maybe a song or a dance is next. The hosts might serve food. The food might be required or expected. We often expect to eat turkey during Thanksgiving in America. But not always. Some families serve ham or lasagna.
Plus what’s unique about the occasion? Is it the favors? Or the music? Maybe it’s the decoration. Or the venue. And the guest list could be unique. Since families change, it could be the last time some people are together. Because we all age, the family won’t look the same ever again.
Finally, what did you see and hear? These events can be a window into human interactions. In addition, you can overhear great dialogue. Finally, don’t take notes at funerals.