Let’s Look at Writing Various Ages
Ages change if we write about more than a year in a character’s life. And we can also find we are writing a clash of them, as parents and their offspring collide, or teachers and students collide.
Infants and Toddlers
The very young can change in rather rapid and surprising ways. Fortunately, any number of developmental charts exist to give you an idea of what a baby or child can do at a certain stage.
Hence, for example, a human newborn should not hold their head up unless they have help or you are writing some sort of fantasy. Furthermore, while these charts give an idea of what to expect, they’re not laws.
Kids develop at their own paces. So recognize that while your newborn character holding her head up is probably not going to be believable, you can still write a range for these milestones. Furthermore, you can also use standard milestones as a way to signal problems with a baby, such as by showing the reader a child who should be crawling as barely holding his head up.
Preschoolers and Elementary School Children
The start of school is a major event in a young child’s life. And so are other firsts, such as learning to read and beginning to really socialize. And their vocabularies are growing as their worlds continue to expand.
By this time, they probably have a good idea of their sexuality even if girls are icky and boys are gross.
Tweens and Teens
As with younger children, these older kids have their own developmental milestones. Puberty in girls comes with not only the development of secondary sex characteristics, but also menarche.
Adolescence in boys can arrive later than in girls. Or maybe we’re all just socially conditioned to believe that. Hmmm…
Writing a historical novel? Then recognize that menarche (a girl’s first menstrual period) occurs about three years earlier now than it did a century ago, due to, among other things, better nutrition.
Kids in these age groups tend to start to get interested in relationships (although asexual folks beg to differ) and everything can be ultra-dramatic.
Some may be losing their virginity or facing pregnancy issues. And others might be late bloomers, wondering why things are happening to everyone but them.
Still others may be finding out they’re asexual or aromantic.
Our present-day culture attaches a number of privileges to this time, including becoming old enough to drive, work, drink, marry, go to war, and even vote.
Young Adults
Young adults taper off from teenaged drama as they generally begin higher education or work or join the military. Their high school relationships might not survive long distance and college.
They might go wild for their first time away from home. Maybe drugs and alcohol are suddenly freely available. And maybe sex is possible more often, particularly as they may be able to find more private spaces.
Or maybe they buckle down, get jobs and apartments. Some might marry, some might have children, and those sets don’t necessarily fully intersect.
Adults in Their Thirties
Not everyone has children, but by this time most people have finished their educations. And many of them are settling into work or into long-term relationships. Those with children have everything from infants to elementary schoolers, for the most part.
Furthermore, they may be starting to see their peers divorcing or even dying, and they may be seeing their parents starting to become frail.
Adults in Their Forties: Welcome to the Middle Ages
The kids – if they have any – are older, and starting to think about colleges, or at least are preparing and tracking one way or the other. Divorced folks (or those never married or in long-term relationships) may find it harder to find love. Perimenopause is common.
And for some people, this is the decade of early-onset Alzheimer’s.
Adults in Their Fifties
Things break, and people may find it harder to run or walk if knees or hips begin to go. Women go through menopause if they haven’t already.
People may find they are paying for earlier mistakes made with too much tanning, or smoking, or poor nutrition or dental care. And their own parents are generally elderly if they still number among the living.
Pretty much everyone has clear signs of aging by now. These include crow’s feet, creaky knees, gray or white hair (or balding), or age spots on their hands.
Furthermore, this can also be the start of the era of the grandparent, or at least of seeing their children graduate, marry or form long-term bonds, and start to get on their own two feet (with exceptions, of course).
However, it can also be a time of significant work responsibilities and stress. Hence some may suffer heart attacks or need coronary bypass surgery.
Adults in Their Sixties
It’s the countdown to retirement! And if a person hasn’t saved enough money, that countdown will take a lot longer.
However, younger-feeling adults can do well for quite a while, so long as they maintain healthy lifestyles. This is the age of the so-called ‘young-old’. Yet one in nine people aged 65 and older have Alzheimer’s.
Also, if these adults have parents who are still alive, those parents are pretty much guaranteed to be frail. So, these adults may be finding themselves taking over their parents’ finances or taking away the car keys.
Adults in Their Seventies: the Young-Old Ages
These are generally still young-old people. However, this is also a stage when cancer diagnoses become more common.
Alzheimer’s incidence is highest in this age group (it’s 44% for ages 75 – 84) and, because Alzheimer’s has a 4 – 8 year average span, many of those people won’t make it to their eighties.
Now, it’s exceptionally rare for anyone to have a living parent, although that’s not 100% impossible. And if the generations are particularly short (as in, having kids in one’s teens or very early twenties), a few of these people may even start to welcome great-grandchildren.
Adults in Their Eighties
If they’ve gone past age 84 and not contracted Alzheimer’s, the incidence drops to 38%. But there can be other forms of dementia. New cancer cases also drop, but that might simply mean a person already had cancer and is now suffering from a recurrence.
Even more people in this age group may have grandchildren or even great-grandchildren. Or they might be great-aunts and great-uncles or even great-grand aunts and uncles. Work should be long past them, and they may be considering mortality and their estates.
Life expectancy varies, but a man aged 65 today can expect, on average, to reach 84.3 years of age. And a woman aged 65 today can expect, on average, to make it to 86.6.
How many will still have at least one living parent? There are a few but their numbers are very small. And yes, there’s an occasional person in their nineties with at least one living parent. But that’s just about getting to be the stuff of record books.
The Nineties and Beyond – the Ages Near the End of the Line
It is harder to avoid some sort of mobility or memory issue by this age group. Adults in this group are usually no longer fully in charge of their own money. It’s rare for anyone to be driving at this age.
And living conditions are generally going to mean either being cared for by a professional aide or family member, or independent or assisted living—or memory care.
Being cared for can happen in a person’s own house or apartment, or in a relative’s, or in a community or retirement home. Adults in this age group may have issues with toileting, showers, and shopping for necessities.
Travel can be tough. Falls are scary, as are hospital stays. Either can end up being fatal.
A gender disparity becomes extremely pronounced by this time. How many men are there to women? Per the US Census in 2011, it’s 38 men for every 100 women. For ages 95 – 99, it drops to 26 to 100. And in the hundreds, the ratio of men to women is 24 to 100.
Also according to that same study, the nineties are overwhelmingly white, at 88.1%. But for all ages in the US, whites are about 75% of the population.
What’s the Uppermost Limit?
We… don’t really know. Maybe there isn’t one. But as of the writing of this blog post, the oldest person to have ever lived (where the age was independently verified) was Jeanne Calment, who lived to about 122 and a half.
But she’s the only person verified to have survived past age 120.
Also, the eight people with the longest verified lifespans were all women. The oldest man ever? He only made it to 116. But to crack the top eight, you’ve got to make it to 117 and about six months.
How Do You Get More People to Make it to the Oldest Possible Ages?
What makes a person more likely to make it to, say, 110? Or just (just!) 100? Here are a few vital factors in real life; perhaps you can use them in fiction.
Medical and Healthcare-Related Help
• Vaccinations – with many childhood diseases close to being wiped out (don’t get me started on the anti-vax crowd), many more people make it past age two. It may not seem like much, but it’s one of the first hurdles.
† Antibiotics – as a result of having antibiotics, many if not most infections don’t kill people. Of course, this is all dependent upon not unleashing pathogens that are resistant.
• Good nutrition – get enough vitamin C (citrus and other fruits and vegetables, mainly), and you won’t get scurvy. Get enough vitamin D (seafood is a good source) and you’ll avoid, among other problems, osteoporosis. Or at least it won’t have an early onset.
Exercise is important, too.
Societal and Invention-Related Help
† Safety belts and airbags – these devices save the lives of millions of people every single year.
• Drug purity laws – one of the reasons a lot of illegal drugs are so lethal is what they’re cut with. But the legal stuff has to be pure, and manufacturers are subject to inspections.
† Companionship – mental health is vital to longer life! So, mental health treatment is also important. Preventing suicides will, of course, prolong lives.
• Gun control – argue with me all you like, if you’re so inclined. But fewer guns mean fewer stray bullets, unlocked cabinets, etc. And, fewer suicide attempts which succeed. Gun control is a form of means prevention, just like putting high fencing on bridges.
† Fair and equitable (and vigilant) law enforcement – getting drunk drivers off the roads and keeping neighborhoods safe from prowlers is another preventative measure.
Of course, there are others. But these are a start. If your characters are missing one or more of these conditions, then the society you’re wrapping them around won’t have as many people making it to a ridiculously old age, if anyone. 
Ages and Takeaways
So, what does this all mean when it comes to writing? Beyond the obvious issues of childhood developmental stages, a character of a certain age can be expected to have certain ailments, opportunities, relationships, injuries, responsibilities, and concerns.
In fact, society will make judgments on a person’s age, so be prepared for your readers to judge your characters based on their ages.
Ages matter. Character ages make a difference. And understanding general differences among ages can make your characters even more believable. Oh, and generations matter, too.
Oh, and please don’t give all the good lines and all the adventure to the very young. They shouldn’t be the only characters of yours who get to have any fun.
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