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Category: Writing

If you’re not into any kind of writing, then this is highly likely to not be the blog for you.

Ya think???

How and Why Does Writing Speak to Us?

The written word is something that we have in common with the ancient Egyptians, with people on the other side of the planet, and with celebrities who we will never meet.

Fiction writing, in particular, bridges gaps in the world, and through time. Have you ever read something written by an author who is long dead?

Whether it’s Jane Eyre or The Art of War, we can hear the author’s voice as we read (and yes, I am well aware that The Art of War isn’t fiction. I’m kind of tired, okay?).

But I digress.

Independent Writers Do It All

When we do it well, and we do it right, the indie author wears many hats. Researcher. Editor. Planner. Marketer. Cover artist (or at least hirer of the cover artist). Bookkeeper. Advertiser. Tax Preparer.

Indy writing is a small business. So, like it or not, you’ve got to know these things, or be able to hire someone who does.

Past, Present, and Future Authoring

One of the best things about authoring is the concept of eternity. Now, I don’t honestly expect anything I write to end up being studied in college or becoming movie fodder. But it is still  there, and it can be there forever if you can (and are willing to) preserve it.

This is why I encourage publishing, by the way, even if you never make a dime.

Eternity.

Character Creation

Let’s Look at the Background of Character Creation

Character creation is rather personal. It depends on how organized you are, and how much you like to plan. So every writer’s character creation will vary. This is what I tend to do. However, my methods are not necessarily the best or the most consistent ones.

Your mileage, when it comes to character creation, will undoubtedly vary. And that is perfectly okay.

Origins for Some of My Character Creation

For me, characters arise in a few ways. One is just that I can ‘hear’ their ‘voices’. Or I might see a face clearly. Lots of situations or activities can create a focus.

One way is, I might walk around my neighborhood and consider what I see. This is whether it’s something from nature or just someone’s illegally parked car. Music in particular can be helpful for this, although it is not absolutely necessary.

For a fanfiction bad girl character I named Pamela Hudson, her personality came barreling in when I heard the Amy Winehouse song, You Know I’m No Good.

And sometimes, characters just appear, fully formed. I tend to consider names in the context of how they sound and what they mean.

Hence a character like Marnie Shapiro Chase came out of nowhere because I liked how her name sounded. Then I worked on putting her together. The same was true of Colonel Craig Firenze. He started off sounding good and I built from that.

For Josie James, I didn’t hear her voice until I changed her name from Jodie James.

Character Creation: Ethnicity

Still other characters might arise out of names and ethnicity. Or even national origin. Jazminder Parikh and Akanksha Kondapalli are both Indian women, but Jazzie is a doctor, whereas Akanksha is an attorney.

I also tend to like someone to be from the southern US. Hence Jeannie Louise Scutter and Patricia LaRue arose.

Characters from the UK might be Dave Shepherd, super-spy, or Dr. Devon Grace. Plus there are also scullery maids Frances Miller and Ceilidh O’Malley. And psychiatrist Dr. Carmen D’Angelo. So it runs the gamut of rich and poor.

In addition, I try to write some characters of races different from my own. These run the gamut from Dr. Elise Jeffries and Dr. Mei-Lin Quan to Solar System President Fankald Williams and her sister, Tamara Woods.

What’s in a Name?

While draping a character around the meaning of their name is kind of silly, it can sometimes help to inspire. I liked the name Ceilidh O’Malley, and it was a bonus that her name means a type of jig.

Hence someone who grew up in grinding poverty had a rather frivolous name. So I gave her the middle name of Aisling, which is Irish Gaelic for dream.

Dave Shepherd didn’t originate as a protector in the Obolonk universe, but as I wrote him, he became one.

Other characters just almost tell me their names. This was certainly the case with Craig Firenze and Kitty Kowalski in Mettle. In Mettle, the two bratty tweens were always going to be Kitty and Mink. Tathrelle was another name that sprang up, for Untrustworthy.

Frances always existed in The Real Hub of the Universe, but her surname started off as Marshall, not Miller. But I ended up changing her name, as a character named Marsh was mentioned too often with her.

Other characters are named for people I know, in whole or in part. The Enigman Cave is particularly chock full of such characters.

It’s everyone from the Chief Veterinarian to a space defender to the Chief Engineer. The Real Hub of the Universe has some, including the Chief of Police. Plus the Ashford baby is named for a man I know from the online writing community.

Character Creation: Time to Show Some Emotion

Characters also exist to make the main character feel something. And this isn’t always something good. Ben Chase exists to piss Marnie off in The Enigman Cave.

Johnny Barnes exists in The Real Hub of the Universe to terrify Ceilidh and force her into action. Jeannie exists in Mettle to anger Craig and eventually make him not feel too bad about getting on a plane.

And one of the reasons Dave Shepherd exists in the Obolonk universe is to help Peri get over Charlie.

Oh, and Bobby Brodie exists to be an uncouth lout. Which he does a little too well.

Plus there are always love interest characters, even if they don’t last. For example, that’s Lex Feldman in Enigmans and Dalton Farouk in Time Addicts, the 2019 NaNoWriMo novel.

Shapiro, Shapiro, Shapiro

As a kind of personal ‘tell’ and Easter egg in my works, every longer piece (except for Untrustworthy, as none of those characters are human), somebody is named Shapiro.

This is even true in fan fiction, where characters Ethan and Rebecca Shapiro (father and daughter) figure prominently in the overall storyline.

The Obolonks series has Greg Shapiro. He’s a wisecracking cop living in Connecticut. The Enigman Cave has Marnie Shapiro Chase, the captain of the spaceship. Marnie’s kind of frumpy and nerdy but also very smart.

Then in Real Hub of the Universe, the name is subtle. Blima Shapiro Taub is a character never actually seen ‘on screen’. Blima is known more for her jealousy than anything else. But I give her a bit of a voice in the short story, The Bride.

In Mettle, Shapiro is Eleanor Braverman’s maiden name. Eleanor suffers from Alzheimer’s.

So you can see that the Easter egg characters are all rather different.

In the November 2019 NaNoWriMo novel, the name shows up as a the married name of Josie James’s older sister, Hayley.

Character Creation: Purposeful Characters

Sometimes characters are necessary to fulfill some purpose or another. Technically, that’s supposed to be the case with all characters (oops!). Either advance the plot or be background exposition.

Hence Noah Braverman’s fellow reporter, Francine O’Donnell, serves to give him a bit of a reason to express his thoughts out loud in Mettle.

Ben Chase serves as Marnie’s foil, but he also makes a big discovery which helps drive the Enigman plot. And I needed Livia Thorson in Obolonks to explain some of the robotics, just as I needed Ned O’Malley in Real Hub to explain how Ceilidh was going to get to the states.

Sometimes purposeful characters come in the form of radio or TV show hosts, or nameless people reading news stories aloud or commenting on them.

How many times have you stood in line at a coffee shop and heard people discuss the events of the day? Even if it’s the sports section or politics or whatever, it can still help to orient readers as to time and place.

In Untrustworthy, Ixalla started off as a kind of explainer character, but then the role grew when I turned her into a revolutionary.

Takeaways

Why do you need a character? Do you like them? Do they drive the plot? Will you kill them off if you have to? Make characters to fulfill these purposes or to add depth and background. Give your story dimension with people who feel real.

Character creation is a personal process. It can be planned and detail-oriented. Or it can be haphazard. You make the call!


Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon

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How to Edit a Manuscript: 7 Stages to Success

Are You Looking for How to Edit a Manuscript?

Here’s some straight talk on how to edit a manuscript. Whether you’re new to writing or it’s old hat, you have got to know how to do this.

Let’s start with the negative.

Here’s Not How to Edit a Manuscript

Let’s start with what should be basic but, sadly, is anything but.

You have to edit your work. It doesn’t matter how good you are. It doesn’t matter how smart you are. And it doesn’t matter how experienced you are. Or, you think you are.

Because every single piece of writing needs editing. There are no exceptions to this rule.

Once more, for the cheap seats: YOU. MUST. EDIT. YOUR. WORK.

Betas and Sensitivity Readers

Without getting too far into what either of the above are, the bottom line is that it’s not their job to fix your stuff on the technical level. Yes, everybody makes typos. And that’s normal. Because a stray comma or a homophone (e. g. they’re for their) is no big deal.

The real issue is when a writer dumps their first draft onto beta readers. I have had this happen to me more than once, and here is what I do.

I kick it back. Yes, really! Because I have no time to correct great big swaths of someone else’s MS. And, let’s face it, editors charge by the word. Making your beta readers do this is essentially demanding that you get something for free from them.

They already agreed to read your stellarish prose. So don’t make them waste their time correcting the technical stuff.

Self-Publishing

There is a lot of great self-published work out there. And there is also a lot of self-published junk. Want to be the former, rather than the latter? The road to great work of any sort is to edit that sucker.

So, will your work be wonderful, famous, popular, and beloved? Not necessarily. But at least people won’t lose their place or guess the killer too soon or otherwise want to throw your book across the room.

How to Edit a Manuscript, Really, I Mean it This Time!

So, this is the advice I give everyone.

Stage 0: Preliminaries

Leave it alone for 3 months.

Don’t cheat and go back early!

In the meantime, write short stories. Nothing fancy; they can be fluffy fanfiction. You just want to keep writing. Why? Because it’s a good habit to stay in, if you can.

Stage 1: How to Edit a Manuscript? It Really Starts With Simple Word Searching

So, those 3 months are up? Run searches for words like—

† That
• Just
† Very
• Actually
† Seem (and all of its variants)
• See (and its numerous variants, including words like Look) – yes, of course characters look at each other! But this is for anything where you write something like, She could see he was tired. Eventually, you should just change it to something like He yawned.

Keep the numbers to the side. A scratch pad is fine.

Stage 2: You Are Your Own Biggest Fan

Now read your MS like a reader. You’re not looking for errors. You are a fan and you are reading the latest work from your favorite author.

Take note (that scratch pad comes to the rescue again) of when—

• You get confused
† Or you can’t tell characters apart
• You get bored
† Or you can’t picture something
• You guessed the twist or the killer, whatever the surprise/denouement is

Done?

Stage 3: Dumping Crutch Words and Repetitive Words

Now start the real business of editing. Remember your words like that, etc.? There are actually more words which should be on your list but those are a good start. Reread sentences. Can they make sense without those words? Then out they go.

And consider some body language-style changes like I suggest above with the tired-to-yawn substitution. They will paint a much more colorful picture for your readers.

Stage 4: How to Edit a Manuscript by Fixing Characters, Plot, and Dialogue

Characters are hard to distinguish? Then consider what makes people unique. And see if you can combine two minor characters.

Is the twist given away too early? Then introduce complications. Throw in some monkey wrenches.

Read the dialogue out loud. If you have trouble saying it, then it may not be realistic. Or, you might just have a bunch of run-on sentences.

Done?

Stage 5: Beta Readers and Sensitivity Readers

Find beta readers. And offer to read their work. Be kind, fair, constructive, and helpful. Hopefully they will be as well.

Listen to beta readers but their words aren’t necessarily gospel.

If your work is about a marginalized community that you are not a part of, sensitivity readers can be a very good idea. As in, writing gay people if you’re straight, or Black characters when you’re white. You don’t have to do this for every single side character with only three lines.

But a major character or a memorable minor one? You want to make sure you’re not stereotyping or othering or exoticizing people. Why? Because present-day readers will tear you apart if you do. And they would be right to do so.

Done?

Stage 6: Take a Break

Give it another 3 weeks to a month to sit around. Write more short stories in the meantime.

Stage 7: Cut, Slash, and Burn

Is that time up? Read again, the whole thing, this time as the writer. Edit it until it bleeds.

Congratulations. You’ve just edited your MS.

Takeaways for How to Edit a Manuscript

So the truth is, editing can be an incredibly daunting process. This is particularly true if you’re a pantser, so you’re not planning your work before you start. Personally, that would drive me nuts.

But this method of how to edit a manuscript can work for either plotters or pantsers. And it can even work for folks in the middle, just like me: the so-called plantsers.

If you think you like how I know how to edit a manuscript, then contact me! I do a little freelance editing at times, and would love to contract with you for some work!


Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon

Want More on Beta Reading and Editing?

If you want more on beta reading and editing, then please be sure to check out the following blog posts:

Beta Reading:

Beta Reading for Indie Writers
Beta Reading, Part 2
Working With a Beta Reader
Beta Readers and Editors

Editing:

Writing Needs Editing, Part 1
Writing Needs Editing, Part 2
Choosing an Editor
Editing Tips

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Writing Children and About Children

Children

Children characters can present their own set of challenges. And keep in mind, I wrote a bit about kids in the Aging post. However, now it’s time for a deeper dive into what it means to write about children.

Don’t gloss over childhood. It’s not all sunshine and roses. Some kids have truly horrible lives – bullying, abuse, poverty, and trafficking are all still with us. Some kids aren’t wanted. Or they don’t look like society thinks they should. And don’t forget, even infants can get cancer. But right now, let’s concentrate on some issues that are a lot easier to take.

Infants and Toddlers

The very young can change in rather rapid and surprising ways. Fortunately, several developmental charts exist. And they can give you an idea of what a baby or child can do at a certain stage. Hence, for example, a newborn should not be out of diapers unless they have help or you are writing some sort of fantasy. Furthermore, while these charts give an idea of what to expect, they’re not laws.

Kids develop at their own paces. So recognize that while your newborn character going diaper-less is probably not going to be believable, you can still write a range for these milestones. Furthermore, you can also use standard milestones as a way to signal problems with a baby, such as by showing the reader a child who should be crawling as barely holding his head up.

Preschoolers and Elementary School Children

The start of school is a major event in a young child’s life. And so are other firsts, such as learning to read and beginning to really socialize. And their vocabularies are growing as their worlds continue to expand. By this time, they probably have a good idea of their sexuality even if girls are icky and boys are gross.

For the most part, a child does not naturally lisp! Adding lisping and other affectations will just irritate most readers. However, you can indicate immaturity with simpler sentence structures and vocabulary. A young child has not read Kierkegaard. And they probably don’t know what plenipotentiary means, either. Unless, of course, they’re a genius.

But use genius characters sparingly. Most people just plain aren’t Einstein or Hawking, etc. Too many geniuses, unless you make them some sort of a special program, are just going to be annoying to readers.

Tweens and Teens

As with younger children, these older kids have their own developmental milestones. Puberty in girls comes with not only the development of secondary sex characteristics, but also menarche. Adolescence in boys can arrive later than in girls.

Writing a historical novel? Then know that menarche (a girl’s first menstrual period) occurs about three years earlier now than it did a century ago. This is due to, among other things, better nutrition.

Kids in these age groups tend to start to get interested in relationships (although asexual folks beg to differ). Plus, everything can be ultra-dramatic. Some may be losing their virginity or facing pregnancy issues. And others might be late bloomers, wondering why things are happening to everyone but them.

Our present-day culture attaches a number of privileges to this time, including becoming old enough to drive, work, drink, marry, go to war, and even vote.

Takeaways

Kids are more than their developmental stages. However, it still pays to know these and follow them, even if you want your characters to subvert them. And as with all characters, do your best to avoid clichés.

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Writing Progress Report – Second Quarter 2024

Progress Report –Second Quarter 2024

How was second quarter 2024 for writing? So I spent second quarter 2024 writing and editing a ton of short stories. But I am also looking for work. So, that takes precedence.

Second Quarter 2024 Posted Works

First of all, I worked on a number of new short stories. A lot of these had been drafted on paper and so I spent some time editing them.

This included A Fairy Tale for Skeptical Adults.

Then on Wattpad I posted nowhere. Am I completely done with that platform? It’s… starting to look that way. Because, frankly, for the sake of my own mental health, the last thing I need is to post in places which just aren’t the right audience for what I create.

Second Quarter 2024 Drafts

So far, and a few of these are from first quarter 2024, but I forgot to post them (oops!), here’s what I’ve been working on:

The New Kid – after an Earth-alien war ends, the parties decide on a student exchange. What could possibly go wrong?
The Walls Came Tumbling Down… Again – when a temporal mercenary upends the timeline so Rome never fell, it’s up to Rachel Shapiro and her work mishpacha to correct the timeline to fix the present day and end slavery.
What’s an Animal? – the humans of the future have killed or destroyed the habitats of every animal on Earth. The world is divided into uniform grids where people pollinate the plants, because there aren’t any more insects. Until one day a little girl named Cherish finds… something.
Recruitment Time (I don’t love this title) – time traveler Sharon Ensley was supposed to go to 16th century Turkey. But her path is diverted, and she ends up in New Jersey the day before 9/11. But the events of 9/11 seem to be happening on 9/10, and now include more plane crashes, in NATO countries in Europe. Everything is worse. But how, and why?
A Fairy Tale for Skeptical Adults – when Flora Levy turns 60, she inherits her great-grandmother Florence’s books. There’s a Torah, a family cookbook, and more. But there’s also an odd book which doesn’t seem to belong with the others. When Flora starts to read it aloud, she summons… someone from the book itself.

Milestones

Also, I have written over 3.5 million words (fan fiction and wholly original fiction combined; there’s slightly more original stuff these days). So right now my stats on Wattpad for wholly original works are as follows:

† Dinosaurs – 42 reads, 11 comments
• How to NaNoWriMo – 26,183 reads, 340 comments (pulled from Wattpad due to their severing their association with NaNoWriMo)
† My Favorite Things (like kibble) – 994 reads, 133 comments
Revved Up – 59,491 reads, 531 comments
† Side By Side – 21 reads, 2 comments
• Social Media Guide for Wattpad – 16,862+ reads, 592 comments
† The Canadian Caper – 511 reads, 37 comments
The Dish – 253 reads, 24 comments
† There is a Road – 189 reads, 28 comments

Published Works as of Second Quarter 2024

Also, I am amassing quite the collection of published works! So, here’s everything that has found a home so far.

Untrustworthy, which is my first published novel. So yay!

A True Believer in Skepticism, published in Mythic Magazine.

Almost Shipwrecked, a story in the January 2019 edition of Empyreome, a site which unfortunately is no more.

Canaries, a short story in the March 29, 2019, edition of Theme of Absence.

Complications, a story in the Queer Sci Fi Discovery anthology. So this is an anthology where the proceeds went to supporting the QSF website.

Cynthia and Wilder Bloom, stories in the Longest Night Watch II anthology.

Props, a story in the Longest Night Watch I anthology. So this is an anthology where the proceeds go to Alzheimer’s research.

Surprises, a story in Book One of the 42 and Beyond Anthology set.

The Boy in the Band, a story in the Pride Park anthology. So this is an anthology where the proceeds go to the Trevor Project.

The Interview, the featured story in the December 14, 2018 edition of Theme of Absence. So they even interviewed me!

The Last Patient, a story in the Stardust, Always anthology. This was an anthology where the proceeds go to cancer research.

The Resurrection of Ditte, a story in the Unrealpolitik anthology.

This is My Child, a short story published in the April 8, 2019 edition of Asymmetry Fiction, another site which is no more.

Three Minutes Back in Time, a short story published in Mythic Magazine.

Killing Us Softly, a short story published in Corner Bar Magazine.

Darkness into Light, a short story published in Corner Bar Magazine.

WIP Corner

So my current WIPs are as follows:

The Obolonk Murders Trilogy – so this one is all about a tripartite society. But who’s killing the aliens?

The Enigman Cave – can we find life on another planet and not screw it up? You know, like we do everything else?

The Real Hub of the Universe Trilogy – so the aliens who live among us in the 1870s and 1880s are at war. But why is that?

Mettle – so it’s all about how society goes to hell in a hand basket when the metals of the periodic table start to disappear. But then what?

Time Addicts – No One is Safe – so this one is all about what happens in the future when time travel becomes possible via narcotic.

Time Addicts – Nothing is Permanent – this is the second in this trilogy. What happens when time is tampered with and manipulated in all sorts of ways? It’s the ultimate in gaslighting, for one thing.

Time Addicts – Everything is Up For Grabs – as the timelines smack together and continue to diverge, it gets harder to tell the “real” timeline from all the newer fake ones. And what if some of the changes are for the better?

Prep Work

So currently, my intention, for 2025’s NaNoWriMo, is to start to write the third trilogy in the Time Addicts/Obolonks universe. But I need to iron out the plot! So a bit of this year has been spent on that. I have no name for this one yet.

For 2022 – 2024 NaNoWriMo, I have decided to create a prequel for each of the 5 main universes: Real Hub of the Universe, Obolonks, Time Addicts (while the Obolonks and Time Addicts are in the same universe, I just plain want to write two separate prequels!), Untrustworthy, The Enigman Cave, and Mettle.

In 2022, I wrote the prequels for Time Addicts (The Dust Between Our Stars) and The Real Hub of the Universe (The East Side of the Universe). For 2023, it was the Untrustworthy prequel (Unreliable) and Obolonk prequel (Eros vs. Thanatos). And for 2024, it is the Enigman Cave and Mettle prequels.

So, I anticipate a lot of fun and perhaps a little confusion. But it’s all good!

Second Quarter 2024 Queries and Submissions

The older ones have moved. You can find them on my Publishing Stats page.

It’s been quiet. But that has been by design. Right now, I just plain don’t feel like putting myself out there these days. There, I said it.

In Progress

As of the end of second quarter 2024, the following are still technically in the running for publishing:

This list is the name of the story and then the name of the potential publisher.

† I Used to Be Happy – Gemini Magazine
• Justice – Adbusters
† Mettle – RAB
• Soul Rentals ‘R’ Us – A Thousand One Stories
† Who Do We Blame for This? – Sonder Review

But the truth is, I am not kidding myself. Those aren’t going to magically turn into acceptances, I bet.

Second Quarter 2024 – Productivity Killers

So it’s work, what else? I am working on a ton of things and since that is also writing, it can sometimes burn me out. Because second quarter 2024 is evidently not the end of that!


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Writing – Starting a Piece

Let’s Look at Starting a Piece, Any Kind of Writing

Starting can be fraught with stress and worry. You can, at times, wonder if what you’re doing is worthwhile at all. But don’t worry; it is. And your own personal writing process may end up looking rather different.

That’s totally fine. There is no one way to do this!

One year I created a kind of web. I had the main character and put her name in a circle on paper.

Then I drew a bunch of lines radiating out. I connected her to other characters and then, on the lines, wrote why they connected—whatever it was (and she didn’t have to connect to everyone, of course).

That got me to start creating scenes, and I ordered them.

Some ended up just being little scenelets. I did this with all of the major characters and eliminated redundancies. Once I had the order down, I started to think about transitions between scenes.

Points of View

This web concept worked very well for a story with one main character. For The Real Hub of the Universe series, Ceilidh was always the center of things and everything would happen from her point of view.

If she did not directly witness something, she would have to read about it or learn about it in some other fashion.

Sometimes this meant that another character would have to have a conversation with her. This would get her back up to speed.

Multiple POVs

For a piece with multiple points of view, the process can differ. This time, the web is more like a series of intersecting rings. How do characters relate? What do they see, feel, and hear, touch and taste? Who do they know, or like, or despise?

What are their goals? What are their prejudices?

With Mettle, there are nine separate points of view, although some of them (like Eleanor’s) aren’t the focus too often. Instead, characters with more “screen time”, such as Nell, Craig, and Elise, had to do more of the heavy lifting.

One thing which helped a great deal (and it was serendipity, I swear!) was that one of the major plot points concerned lessons which the middle schooler characters had not yet had.

Therefore, a part of the exposition became teaching them. As they learned, so did the reader.

This is one of the reasons why so many television programs kick off with someone moving or getting a new job, or the start of a relationship.

Newness is appealing, yes, but it’s also because that gives an expository “out”. If everyone in the book or TV show knows how high Niagara Falls is, then they won’t need to bother talking about it.

But if one character does not know, then the audience or reader learns this piece of information at the same time that the ignorant character does. That’s ignorant in terms of “not knowing” rather than being dumb, FYI.

But at the same time, don’t go nuts with this. Exposition should be spooned out via teaspoons and not ladles. Just because you researched something, does not mean it has to end up on the page.

Fun Ways to Get Started

If your initial line or lines can also inject some exposition, that can be terrific when it comes to orienting your readers as to time and place. And when you’re writing about something wholly alien, you’re practically forced to do so, anyway.

At other times, your initial line(s) can be a means of misdirecting the reader. Consider Small Acts of Defiance, where the first line is simply:

We crossed when I was five.

Since the story is about border crossing, this works well. It also helps to put the reader on a path to thinking these are border crossings from Mexico to the United States. But they’re not…

In What’s an Animal?, the piece starts with:

My name is Cherish, and I’m eleven years old. My Momma got me this diary because she said a girl my age would want to write down her deepest, darkest secrets.

With an immediate orientation as to age, but nothing else, Cherish could be like almost anyone with a diary.

Starting a Piece: Some Takeaways

If you’re still having a hard time starting, recognize that it can also be a species of writer’s block. But if the stress is really bad, you can always write about that, too.

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Self-Review – Eros vs. Thanatos

Review – Eros vs. Thanatos

In part, I admit I wrote Eros vs. Thanatos to get out of having to come up with a whole new plot for NaNoWriMo 2024.

But it was also because I wanted to give Peri Martin a better fleshed-out backstory. And, I wanted to really show Charlie Hollis alive. This helps to give more dimension to her character and the Obolonk universe as a whole.

Background

One great part of this story (for me, anyway) is being able to show Peri and Charlie actually working together. I also used it as an opportunity to reveal just how hot guns came to be.

This story also serves to bridge between The Dust Between Our Stars (first contact) and The Obolonk Murders. In the latter, it’s obvious that we have been in a society with aliens and semi-sapient robots for a while.  But how did we get there? In part, this story fills in the reader.

Plot

It’s a time of change. As a condition of getting her divorce from Anil Deshpande, Detective Sergeant Peri Martin trades her engagement ring for the deed to the downtown Boston apartment. When her department partner, Vic Frontieri, retires to an orb in the Uranian System, she gets a new partner, Charlie Hollis.

Peri navigates a mixed-up work and at times romantic relationship with sometimes-married Charlie while they deal with rival gangs blowing each other away with a new weapon, the hot gun.

Personal flamethrowers are the nastiest feature of Pandora’s box. It doesn’t help that the talented engineer making these weapons even more lethal is mob princess Kiki Madden.

Can Peri and Charlie stop the gang war and rein in the arms race before everyone’s remains end up small enough to fit into a ring box?

And speaking of rings, will a mutual love of an obscure fandom bring together Kiki and Burnside mob scion Marius Burnside—and maybe bring about peace?

All’s fair in love and engineering.

Characters in Eros vs. Thanatos

The characters are Peri Martin, Charlie Hollis, Dennis Dolan, Greg Shapiro, and other members of the New England Meg Police Department. Other characters include mobster Dutch Burnside; his son Marius; and his ex-wife Noreen. Also, rival mobster Melinda Killeen Madden; her husband Philip Madden; their daughter Kenisia (Kiki); and witness Nate Johnson.

There are also some moments with Anil Deshpande, Sudarshana Deshpande, Doug Anderson, and an Obolonk named Method (They Say This One is Very Methodical).

Memorable Quotes

The next morning, Peri was awoken by a ringing in her left ear. This was nothing unusual, for she had had a mini-phone implanted in her ear for years. Groggily, she flipped a small switch behind her earlobe. “Hello?” She yawned.

“This is Bettybot One Four Six. I have a Mrs. Sudarshana Deshpande to speak with you.”

“A robot is calling? What?” Peri tried to shake the cobwebs.

“The connection is being slightly delayed as a courtesy since it is before your stated awake time. If the connection is refused, this robot will inform your caller and will take a message of no more than one thousand characters or fifty words, whichever is longer.”

“Oh, um, yeah. Put her through, I guess.” Peri glanced at her tablet. The time was 6:23 AM. She blinked several times. Oh yeah, Mumbai-Bangkok is ten hours later than here.

There was a click and then an annoyed woman’s voice with a moderately heavy Indian accent. “Perdita! Why didn’t you pick up right away?”

Peri winced at the use of her full name. I don’t even like it when Mom and Dad call me that. “Oh, er, hi, Sudarshana. What a less than pleasant surprise. It’s not even six-thirty here.”

“Oh. Well, it’s almost four-thirty here and your time zone is nonsense anyway.”

“What do you want?” Peri whined.

“What?”

“Your demands. What are your demands this time?”

“Demands? I do not make demands.”

“You only call me whenever you want something. In case you hadn’t noticed, Anil and I are no longer married. Why didn’t you call him at this ungodly hour instead?”

“My son is busy.”

“Yeah, busy boffing my replacement, in our apartment downtown, to boot.”

Rating for Eros vs. Thanatos

The story has a strong MA rating. Peri and Charlie deal with some extremely dangerous people, and the deaths and injuries are particularly gruesome. I am not kidding.

Takeaways

I love writing Peri, so picking up her story again was like coming home. As for Charlie, he was a revelation. He’s just as much of a jackass as I had originally wanted him to be, but he’s also truly skilled. And smart.


Want More of the Obolonk Universe?

If the story of the Obolonks resonates with you, then check out my other articles about how our society turns tripartite, with humans, robots, and Obolonks.

Character Reviews: The Obolonk Murders

Humans
Peri Martin
Greg Shapiro
Rachel Gifford

Robots
Tommy 2000
Selkhet 3000

Obolonks
TSTITO

Character Reviews: Time Addicts

The Good Guys
Josie James
Carmen D’Angelo, MD
Dalton Farouk
Tad Lewis
• Cyndi Mendez
† Bobby Brodie
• Keisha Darnell
† Vera Travers

The Bad Guys
Peter Ray
† Dae Ou Xiang
Elston Young
† Corwin Zachary

The Obolonk Universe

Prequels

The Dust Between Our Stars
Eros vs Thanatos

Self-Reviews: Obolonk Trilogy

The Obolonk Murders
Self-Review: The Polymer Beat
The Badge of Humanity

Self-Reviews: Time Addicts Trilogy

No One is Safe
Nothing is Permanent
Everything is up for Grabs

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Self-Review – Unreliable

Review – Unreliable

My decision to write Unreliable wasn’t just based on the fact that it would be a lot easier than coming up with a new plot for NaNoWriMo 2023, heh.

It was also because I wanted to correct a lot of the issues in Untrustworthy. I was also glad to be able to add to the Untrustworthy universe, and fill it out a lot more.

Background

Tathrelle really had no childhood in Untrustworthy. But she had to have had one! When I scoured the old book, one thing that really leapt out at me was a throwaway line about remembering an earlier life of vagrancy. So, I took this one short line and I ran with it.

Plot

The plot of Unreliable is essentially Tathrelle, Ixalla, Velexio, and Adger before the events of Untrustworthy really kick off.

Before the events of Untrustworthy, Tathrelle runs from a man who reminds her of her father. When she runs into Ixalla, her life changes. And, at the same time, the lives of all Cabossians start to change.

Unreliable Characters

The characters are Tathrelle, Ixalla, Velexio, and Adger. Students aren’t really seen but they are heard. Ixalla’s supervisor, the Lead Instructor, is also present, but this is the person in that position before Untrustworthy starts.

Are the characters truly impossible to rely on? Are they lying to the reader (or, at least, to Tathrelle), or are they simply ignorant of reality?

Memorable Quotes

The fashion of the day—such as it was—was sensible monochrome slacks and tunics, regardless of age or gender or fertility status. The only colors anyone ever wore were various shades of tans and browns. The entire populace of Caboss could blend in effortlessly with the reedy herbs growing on either bank of the Central River if they chose. Tathrelle’s mismatched patched tunic and slacks could fit in even more seamlessly.

But that camouflage was only good for the sides of the river. It did not work for an urban setting. The buildings, as uniform as the people, were all done up in shades of gray, their brutalist architecture spare and lean and efficient with no niceties or flourishes.

The only thing differentiating a school from a medical facility, or a nutrition market was an equally boxy, squarish sign, its letters perfectly, uniformly painted in black against pure white, no serifs allowed.

A Rating That is Anything But Unreliable

The story has a T rating. There is a particularly violent flashback. I am not kidding. You have been warned.

Takeaways

Unreliable answers questions which range from why the Cabossians have such stilted speech to whether a planet with transportation sleighs is covered in ice.

I think what I love the most about it is that I am a much better writer than I was when I wrote Untrustworthy. The proof is in the prose.


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How Do I Write a Book?

So, how do I write a book?

Aspiring authors ask this all the time. While there are any number of people who simply work off inspiration, there are others who are filled with doubt. They ask: how do I write a book?

Well, I’m here to tell you. But keep in mind: your personal writing process is valid, too. There’s no one, right way to do this.

How Do I Write a Book and Get Started?

You should start with short stories. Seriously. Much lower stakes. And write lots and lots and lots of them. Funny, sappy, scary, sad — it doesn’t matter. Fanfic is totally cool; so is nonfiction. Tropes are fine, of course. However the spirit moves you.

Write about 1500 – 2000 words per day if you can, but don’t beat yourself up if you miss a day here and there or you miss word count. No biggie. Stuff happens. This is also how to win NaNoWriMo, an activity I highly recommend.

Do this for at least a year.

What Happens Once that Year is Up?

At the end of the year, if you’ve written 2000 words per day, you’ll have written 730,000 words. The vast, vast majority of them will be garbage. This is nothing personal. It is life.

Usually you need to write a good million words or so before things start to get good. By this point, you’ll be nearly 3/4 of the way there.

Time to Review

Then look back, particularly on your older stuff, and you will see how you’ve improved. You will also see how some of your work could be expanded. Maybe it could get a sequel or a prequel. Maybe you need to describe a character better. Whatever.

Edit and Expand

Do that expanding. Of course this also counts toward your million words. A million isn’t some magical number; it’s more that it’s easy to remember. And it tends to show quality because by the time you’ve written that much, you’ve gotten the garbage out of your system.

Get Inspiration

Observe the world around you. Family. Friends. Work. School. The people on the bus. Nature. Traffic. Etc. etc. etc. Write down what inspires or interests you, even if it’s just a phrase someone utters or the scarf they’re wearing. Use those observations as fodder for more of those short stories (yes, you should still be writing short stuff).

Keep Going

Another 6 months or so and yeah, you’ve hit a million written words. Again, look at what you wrote. See if you can change it, combine it, expand it, and otherwise mutate it.

How Do I Write a Book? Now’s the Time to Start Converting Your Short Scribbles into a Book

If you like organization (I personally do), then write an outline for what you think might be a decent book. Steal from your short stories for that book. They are a bank. You have made thousands of deposits. Now it’s time to make some withdrawals.

Tie it together with transitions. You really just care about characters –> conflict –> crisis (also called the climax) –> change. The scene is a particular species of character.

Get to at least 75,000 words. Send it to beta readers and listen to what they have to say (but keep in mind, they may be wrong). Edit it until it bleeds.

Reread it as if you were a fan, not the writer. Fill the plot holes. Sew up the loose ends. Edit again.

And voila, you’ve got a book.

How Do I Write a Book and Have it Go Anywhere?

So that’s the answer to ‘how do I write a book?’ For the answer to how do I get it published, read on.

How do I write a book? It’s easy. It’s hard. Yeah, it’s both.


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Self-Review – The East Side of the Universe

Review – The East Side of the Universe

While I will admit one reason I wrote the East Side of the Universe was to get out of having to come up with a whole new plot for NaNoWriMo in 2022, there were other reasons for it.

One was to address a few issues with Ceilidh, particularly concerning why and how she would be so eager to leave behind Ballyvaughan and everything she knew.

Another was because, in all honesty, I wanted to visit with her and a lot of the gang in The Real Hub of the Universe again!

Background

One of the harder things for beta readers to swallow was the question of why Ceilidh would leave her family so easily. She would not be the first woman to simply accept her lot in life.

Also, Ceilidh isn’t someone who goes to salons or is otherwise getting exposure to the more radical ideas of the 1870s, such as women’s suffrage.

So, I hit upon an idea. She would be changed by someone she meets briefly. Just like sometimes you can pour your heart out to someone you sit next to during a long bus ride, she would pour her heart out to someone she would only be in contact with for a few days.

But who would come to backwater Ballyvaughan and only stay a few days, who wasn’t family?

And then… I got an idea.

Plot of the East Side of the Universe

Ceilidh O’Malley’s life is forever altered by two events in her past. One is the death of her beloved father, Ryan. The other is the arrival of a rogue—Michael Hollis.

Hollis isn’t just a rogue, though. He’s also politically aware of what is going on in England and Ireland at the time. This makes him a threat to upset the ‘apple cart’ that is Ballyvaughan.

Characters

The characters are Ceilidh O’Malley; her mother, Mary; her sister Maeve; and various village residents. There’s also the Barnes family, mainly Nora, Jack, Johnny, Father Paul, Christopher, Harriet, and Alfred.

Plus a pivotal character in her life—Michael Hollis.

And, yes, Michael Hollis is a direct reference to The Obolonk universe‘s Charlie Hollis.

Memorable Quotes

“Has it never occurred to you that there might be more than one Michael in the world? Then again, if you’ve only seen the people in this village, then I suppose I can’t fault you for thinking it’s the center of the universe, the hub of everything. But it’s not. It’s not even the east side of the universe. It’s a lot closer to being a lot of nothing.”

“Ballyvaughan is far from being nothin’. An’ I still don’t think ya’re Michael.”

“What’s this other fellow Michael’s full name?”

“Michael Sweeney.”

“Well, then I ain’t him. I would tell you mine, but like I said, there’s an awful lot to explain, Miss…?”

“O’Malley. Ceilidh O’Malley. An’ now ya’d best tell me your whole, true name, an’ show your face, so we can be properly introduced.”

“Promise you won’t say anything to anyone?”

“I can promise ya nothin’ if I don’t know ya, now, can I? So, show yourself so I can make up my mind.”

“You’re a hardheaded woman, Miss Ceilidh O’Malley. It is Miss, isn’t it?”

“Yes, ‘tis Miss, if ya truly must know.”

“Ah, you wound me, Miss O’Malley. But my loss of face is something I should have anticipated. After all, turnabout is fair play.”

Rating

The story has a K+/T rating. Johnny’s antics are neither cute, nor are they excusable.

Connections to Other Writing

If you saw the surname Hollis and thought of the Obolonk universe, then give yourself a cookie or whatever small reward you like. Because Michael is related to Charlie. Is he a direct ancestor? Probably not, particularly given Michael’s circumstances at the end of this piece.

But I absolutely intend a connection there.

Takeaways for The East Side of the Universe

For Ceilidh to truly grow as a person, she has to change from a rusticated farm girl to a Boston servant to, eventually, a person with a degree of standing in the world. And to be able to accept the science fiction aspects of the Real Hub universe, she has to have an open mind.

While there is no science fiction in it whatsoever, I think The East Side of the Universe contains the events that open her mind.


Want More of the Real Hub Universe?

If the Real Hub Universe resonates with you, then check out my other articles about Ceilidh, Devon, Jake, and the others as they keep the Earth from becoming collateral damage in the War of Knowledge.

Character Reviews:

Ceilidh O’Malley
Dr. Devon Grace
Frances Miller Ashford
Johnny Barnes
Shannon Duffy

Prequel: The East Side of the Universe
Self-Review: The Real Hub of the Universe
Self-Review: The Real Heart of the Universe
and also Self-Review: The Real Hope of the Universe

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Advice for Dealing With a Rejection

Dealing With Rejection

Rejection stinks. There’s no two ways about it.

Here are three things you can do if you have received a rejection from an agent or a publisher.

Mourning a Loss/Rejection

1) Mourn. Yes, mourn! It kinda hurts so allow yourself to feel hurt. But! Put a time limit on that. As in a week. Then consider yourself done with mourning what was.

Leave it!

2) Stick it in a drawer for three months, minimum. Let it go and move onto other things (another good reason to work on a lot of stuff at once).

Review it!

3) After the magical three months (or more) have elapsed, take out the file and the rejection slip.

Objective Considerations

Consider a few objective things: (a) was it the wrong genre for that publisher? Then be more careful next time and keep track of which publisher accepts which kinds of works. (b) was it not submitted correctly? Then take the time to do submissions right.

Do they want an attachment? Then send one next time. Do they want just the pitch and three chapters? Then send that.

Do they just want the pitch? Then only send that. You get the idea. (c) Did you submit to more than one publisher when this one said they didn’t like that? Then don’t do that again.

See what I’m getting at? Pluck the low-hanging fruit, as it were. Don’t get knocked out of contention due to what are essentially unforced errors.

Subjective Considerations with a Rejection

Also consider subjective things: (a) did they not understand what your story is about? Then you need to work on your pitch/blurb. A writers’ group is a great place to do that.

Or (b) did they say they had trouble getting through your story? Then you need to edit that sucker. Never mind if you already did. Edit again. And consider working with a pro editor. They are pricey but that is for a good reason.

If you absolutely cannot afford a professional editor, then you need to hack away at your work yourself. So determine whether scenes or characters can be combined, as a start. Go back to beta feedback (you did work with beta readers, right?) and figure out what you hand waved away and work on what they told you to do. Because they were probably at least partly right.

Or (c) did they say it just wasn’t for them? Then figure out why.

Maybe they got three other moose detective stories before yours. Or maybe they’re closing the imprint you queried to. Maybe they’re just swamped.

Moving On from a Rejection

Most importantly, keep the fires burning. Keep works in five categories:

† Idea stage. You’re just kicking this one around.
• Outlining stage. If you don’t outline, then consider this the ‘serious ideas’ stage. At the absolute minimum, write down the bare bones so you don’t forget anything!
Rough draft writing stage. Get it on paper or pixels.
Beta reading/editing stage. Polish that prose and alter your work in response to feedback.
Querying stage/publishing stage. If you’re self-publishing, then this is just the publishing stage.

The mourning, etc. I listed above? Call it stage #5a, or #4a if you really need to go back into the guts of the piece.

Your writing in any form is worthwhile, even with a rejection. If nothing else, always consider it to be a learning experience.

You can do this.Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon

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