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Author: Janet Gershen-Siegel

I'm not much bigger than a breadbox.

Writing Better AccentsPromotions, Swag, Exposition, Better Dialogue, Character Sexuality, Starting, Personal Writing Process, Starburst Method, how do I write a book, Supporting Indie Authors, Snowflake, Libraries, Descriptions, Ages, Dialogue Tags, Gender Swap, Pocket conflicts, Giveaways, Plotting, mental energy, Character Creation, Scene Setting, Transitioning, Genre Treatments, Easter Eggs, Accents, Plot Creation, Complex evil characters, Bechdel test, Writer Newsletter, Wattpad gets into the Digital Publishing Game, character reviews, Universal Explorations, Libraries, Awards, Social Signals, Blog Community, Query Letter,

Writing Better Accents

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on August 23, 2022

Writing Better Accents

Accents can be tough to write. However, not to worry. Because New York Times bestselling author Dayton Ward has some wonderful advice amidst the humor.

Distinguishing Each Accent

So, can you tell the difference between someone from the Bronx and someone from Brooklyn? And what about Chicago versus Detroit? Or Swedish versus Norwegian? YouTube has a number of videos about speech and speaking details; just conduct a search.

However, I caution you that the information is not always correct. Hence, listen to several videos and try to split the difference, unless you know for certain where the speaker hails from. Because sometimes a person is just trying to practice or mimic the way others speak and they don’t always do such a great job of that.

Respecting the Speakers

If your southern American characters sound like Gomer Pyle, and your Mexican characters sound like Señor Wences, you are probably not doing such a hot job with depicting their accents. Same with a British character who ends up sounding like Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins. Just, don’t.

Furthermore, areas of the world have variations when it comes to speaking. And it’s not just with word choice (e. g. Bostonians call a sandwich on a long roll a grinder whereas that same sandwich is a po’boy in New Orleans and a sub in New York City); it also has to do with sounds. Brooklynites tend to broaden their vowels and can often drop an ending g or an r.

For example, a Brooklynite from the area called “East New York” (such as my own mother) will call Barbey Street “Bobby Street”. Yes, really – true story – I didn’t know the correct name of the street my mother grew up on until we went there and I saw the street sign for the first time.

In addition, a county does not have to be as large as the United States for there to be differences in speech. England is notorious for this. Go to Liverpool and they speak far differently from how people speak in Cornwall.

Accents and Takeaways

Be sure to listen to people who have the accents you want to write about. Do so in person if you can, or at least online with a reliable source. And particularly pay attention to how people say the name of the place they come from. Finally, respect accents and don’t automatically assign intelligence or stupidity based upon them.

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Self-Review – GentrificationShort Stories, Road, My Aliens, Last Patient, interview, Surprises, Props, shipwrecked, child, Killing Us Softly, Ditte, Band, three minutes, Longest Night Watch, Nothing Good Ever Happens, Complications, Your Call, Darkness into Light, canaries, gentrification, Cynthia, True Believer, Short Stories, Wilder Bloom, Dish, Gentrification, Mitalisque, kitten, Last Try, Minnesota Wish, Dominick and Angela, Alix, Alix’s Apocalypse, A Chance Encounter in Time, A Crime in Time, A Show for the Galaxy, Aenor the Wanted, Alien Justice, And the Band Played the Apocalypse, Babel 2.0, Side Pages, Camp, Courier to the Soviets, Frozen Assets, Julie's Dollar, Mandy Goes to Aspen, Martin's Choice, Mike’s Grades, Out of the Work Camp Frying Pan, Saddle Up, Bank Teller, Sarah’s Invention, Small Acts of Defiance, The Future Has No Foundation, The Ides of the Secretarial Pool, Unexpected Help, You Will Drink Your Coffee and Like It, Unreliable, East Side of the Universe, Eros vs Thanatos, Dust Between Our Stars, A Show for the Galaxy, A Fairy Tale for Skeptical Adults, A School for Scavengers, Frozen Assets, Out of the Work Camp Frying Pan, 1960s Temporal Crimes, Lizzie Borden is Vital to the Timeline, Walls Came Tumbling Down Again, The End, Will's Dog, Building Trust, Message in an Odd Bottle, Vive André, The New Kid, What's an Animal,

Self-Review – Gentrification

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on August 18, 2022

Review – Gentrification

Gentrification is about an extremely controversial topic—abortion. When I wrote it, Roe v Wade was still fairly secure. I didn’t intend to write a prophecy.

Background

The story idea originally came to me because house flippers are a pretty large segment of the customers for the company where I work. And then the peeling away of the layers of ownership turned into something far different. But I did not intend to write about much. But it just … happened.

Plot

While peeling wallpaper from an old house’s walls, the narrator comes across a mural, painted in pastels. So, it’s clearly for a child.

She traces down the ownership of the house, finally finding one woman who was probably around when the mural was painted.

Yet Hazel Prentice Morse wasn’t just around. She was in the thick of it.

Characters in Gentrification

The characters are the unnamed narrative, a woman who is a retired lawyer. Also, Hazel Morse, the storyteller, who was twelve at the time of the events. In addition, Hazel’s Aunt Martha and Martha’s boyfriend, Chet. Also, Hazel’s parents and her grandparents.

Memorable Quotes

That woman, Hazel Prentice Morse, agreed to meet with me. We met at a café in her much nicer neighborhood, where she was reserved and somewhat skeptical, even after seeing numerous pictures. Then I drove her to the brownstone. The four flights we had to walk up weren’t too kind to our old knees.

When we were in the room and she saw the mural in the flesh as it were, she started to cry. I didn’t really have much of a place to sit during renovations, so I went downstairs to give her some privacy and find the one folding chair I always bring so I can have a place to eat my lunch.

I brought the chair up. She sat down as I leaned against the windowsill. “What is it?” I asked. “What do you remember, Mrs. Morse? Do you know who the artist was?” When I was still practicing law, I took a ton of depositions. I know how to gently get information out of frightened witnesses. You never forget how to do that.

“Yes, I know who it was.” She stared off into the distance.

“You don’t have to tell me anything.” She was no witness. I didn’t have to indulge my morbid curiosity.

“I do, actually. Woman to woman. It’s funny. But I’m the only person alive who remembers. I imagine the statute has run by now.”

“Statute?”

“The Statute of Limitations—you know—how long you can be charged with a crime.”

Rating

The story has a PG-13 rating. There are some rather upsetting parts of it, and I depict deaths but not in detail. However, the deaths are told via the conceit of having a character relate them decades later. So, the reader is even further removed from them.

But they’re still not the kind of thing most people like to talk about, or ever think about.

Gentrification: the Upshot

I have workshopped this story more than once and I have submitted it for publication. So for a publisher with the cojones to take it on, I think it’s a story to tell.

But I have been getting the feeling that publishers are just too afraid to rock the boat right now.

Gentrification, a story that needs to be told. #amwriting

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Almost Everything But the Tweet – Conquering Twitter (verbal elements)Twitter, Twitter Stream, offsite connections, visual elements, Twitter followers, Optimizing Twitter, Professionalism, Demystifying Twitter, metrics, verbal elements, Amazoncart debuts, Optimizing Twitter, Professionalism, metrics, verbal elements, Bruins denounce Twitter hate, Twitter bigots, lost dogs, using Twitter to track, Shift in Twitter Trends

Almost Everything But the Tweet – Conquering Twitter (verbal elements)

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on August 16, 2022

Almost Everything But the Tweet – Conquering Twitter (verbal elements)

Verbal elements? Twitter is, of course, utterly verbal. It’s just about all text. But not all of that text is tweets.

One piece is the profile. There isn’t a lot of space here. The good news is that these verbal elements are searchable. If you want to make it clear that your company is green, you can put that here. Separate short messages with delimiters like pipes (|) or asterisks (*). Don’t use semicolons as they can end up being converted to code.

This is an easy section to change, so consider changing it as needed, perhaps as special events come up. Just keep track of the older wording so you can more readily recreate it if you ever need to.

Another area is the site URL. In order to be better able to track traffic coming in from Twitter, how about using a unique URL here, say, https://www.yoursite.com/twitter? That page could contain a customized welcome message to Twitter users. This is another readily editable area of Twitter, so why not switch it up as circumstances change?

This is also a useful way to help to better segment your audience. Anyone using the /twitter link is bound to have some sort of affinity with the microblogging service.

Your location is another verbal area. Of course it need not be a real place, but for a commercial Twitter account you can’t get too whimsical here.

However, if you’ve got a multi-state presence (and want to get that across but not create separate Twitter accounts for each state), there’s nothing wrong with making your location something like United States or New England or Great Lakes Region.

Verbiage: Names

Another area is the name behind the account. This is a searchable field. A company can add a tiny bit of additional information here, such as the general company location. Hence the user name could be Your Company but the name behind it could be Your Company, Cleveland.

Yet another area is the name(s) of list(s) that your company uses to follow others. Does a company need Twitter lists? Not necessarily, but you can still use them to make certain accounts stand out.

What about lists like customers or distributors? Perhaps not very imaginative, but these could prove useful in the future if Twitter ever makes it possible to send certain tweets only to certain lists.

Finally, although it is an issue to change it, the username is another nugget of non-tweet verbiage. Instead of changing it, what about creating a few accounts to cover different eventualities? Able2Know used to do this well (although some of these feeds are abandoned these days).

Years ago, Able2know used to split off a few feeds as follows:

† The Generic feed
• New Topics
† Popular Topics and
• Unanswered Topics.

A user could follow any or all of these and see a different slice of that site. The individual user names for the accounts make it abundantly clear which cut of the site you’re following.

But we dropped it, as automatic tweeting meant we were tweeting spam and porn before the moderating team could zap it out of existence.

Takeaways

So, what do you want to get across? I mean, really. What image do you wish to project? Peripheral information can support or obfuscate your message.

Make certain that the content and social media people (if not the entire marketing department) get a say in the wording. They may find things that you missed. Or at least they should be able to help you spot typos.

Choose what you really want your verbal elements to say. And then, say them!

Want More About Twitter AKA X?

If my experiences with X resonate with you, then check out my other articles about Twitter/X. While it’s now got a new name, and has changed considerably, a lot of these tips will still work—and often with other social media platforms as well.

Almost Everything But the Tweet

• Starting a Twitter Stream
† Demystifying Twitter
• Twitter, Social Media and Professionalism
† Conquering Twitter (verbal elements)
• Conquering Twitter (visual elements)
† Optimizing Twitter
• Conquering Twitter (metrics and timing)
† Conquering Twitter (offsite connections)
• Getting More Twitter Followers

And, if you’re a fellow writer, you may want to check out:
† PitMad on Twitter

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Why You Can’t Charge for FanfictionLegal, Creative Commons, fanfiction, crash course, copyright law, exceptions, Practice Law, Avoiding Common Legal Mistakes, Transitioning, cyber infidelity,

Why You Can’t Charge for Fanfiction

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on August 11, 2022

Do You Know Why You Can’t Charge for Fanfiction?

I enjoy fanfiction as much as, perhaps, the next person. But you still can never, ever charge for it. I implore you: don’t even try.

Seriously, put it out of your mind. Someone owns that copyright. And that someone is not you.

But aren’t there exceptions?

Yes, there are some. But they have limitations. Do not hang your hat on them. So first, let’s talk about why fan fiction is problematic.

There are Issues With This Form of Expression

For writers like you and me—and Stephen King and JK Rowling as well, etc.—we prepare our own universes. Some universes are familiar and take any number of real-life elements.

For example, King’s The Stand mainly takes place in more or less present-day America. King does not run into any copyright issues with New York City being New York City. Other places in the book, though, are more the product of his imagination. In Rowling’s Harry Potter universe, though, a lot more of the scenes were dreamt up by her.

For both authors, and for countless others, originality consists of creating a universe, creating characters, devising a plot, and then executing the plot in some fashion. Even in familiar settings, there is still scene setting and universe creation. But it’s more a function of subtraction that addition. That is, you don’t make New York City. You just take the Chelsea section of it.

But that’s not the case with fan fic. In fan fiction, another person (or persons) created the universe and the characters. Even when the fanficcer adds characters, the fictional world remains the original author’s creation. Hence one of the main issues with fan fiction is that it keeps the fanficcer from learning how to do that.

Fair Use and Other Exceptions to Copyright

Time to look at the law.

Per 17 U.S. Code § 107 – Limitations on exclusive rights: Fair use:

In determining whether the use made of a work in any particular case is a fair use the factors to be considered shall include—
(1) the purpose and character of the use, including whether such use is of a commercial nature or is for nonprofit educational purposes;
(2) the nature of the copyrighted work;
(3) the amount and substantiality of the portion used in relation to the copyrighted work as a whole; and
(4) the effect of the use upon the potential market for or value of the copyrighted work.

Can You Use a Fair Use Argument?

Eh, not really.

So the sad old truth is that there are only a few ways to get around copyright. In general, you’re a lot more likely to be able to claim fair use if what you write is educational. This includes citing passages in scholarly works and articles.

If you’re writing an article about Star Trek, no one’s going to have a winning copyright case against you if you write “Live Long and Prosper.” Hell, they wouldn’t even have a good case against me right now, either. Educational, yo’. And, you might be able to argue that the phrase is a part of the general public lexicon now, much like “Live and Let Live”.

The “nature” bit in the law mainly refers to whether the source material is published. Published source material is more likely to be the foundation for fair use. With fan fiction, at least, that is virtually always the case.

Amount and substantiality is a kind of sliding scale. My writing LLAP, above, is tiny when you compare it to the vast array of Trek products, writings, and broadcasts out there.

Finally, the effect part can cover everything from whether the public would be deceived by a too-close copy to using the characters for out and out porn. And while even porn can sometimes that can be seen as parody, recognize that parody is often even harder to prove.

What About Saying You Don’t Want to Make a Profit, or Not Selling it?

Neither matter. 

You can write up disclaimers until the cows come home. But they have nothing to do with the above statute. As a result, this means you can be on the receiving end of a lawsuit even if you give your stuff away. Yep, even if you pay people to take it.

But as a practical and public relations matter, big rights holders are less likely to sue when it’s freebie fanfiction.

Why?

Because the last thing many large corporations want is for the press to turn it into a David and Goliath situation. And these corporations really don’t want to potentially lose and see their copyright get chipped away at. Also, these corporations know that most fan fiction isn’t too popular. So, why draw attention to it?

I’m not suggesting you have free rein, by the way.

Seriously, if Disney (for example), tells you to knock off with fanfiction, do yourself an enormous favor and do so. You do not have the House of Mouse’s deep pockets and access to a stunning array of experienced, high-priced attorneys.

Benefits of Fanfiction

It’s not all bad, of course. The biggest and most measurable benefit is that it keeps you writing. You can often spark creativity by simply being creative, that is, you write five or seven days per week, and you can fill up that writing time fairly readily.

But if you only write three times per month, you may find you have writers’ block when you make the infrequent attempt. There is something about the pressure of deadlines or at least the pressure of your own internal expectations. It helps to not have a blank page to stare at all the time.

There is nothing whatsoever wrong with borrowing another’s universe in order to keep writing and exercising the creativity muscle.

Just don’t try to sell it.

Do YOU know why you can’t charge for #fanfiction? Does it really matter? If you don’t want to be sued, it sure does! #amwriting

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Character Review — Nell MurphyBailee Madison, who I see as Nell Murphy

Character Review — Nell Murphy

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on August 9, 2022

Consider Nell Murphy, One of My Original Characters

Who is Nell Murphy?

For Mettle, I needed a character who would be bullied. In contrast to the wealthy and overly pretty Kitty and Mink—and the troublemaking Dez—I wanted a mousey character. Nell fills the bill perfectly.

Where Did Nell Murphy Come From?

Because I’ve been on the receiving end of bullying myself, writing those scenes was easy. And, frankly, they mainly came from real life. But it’s not just what happens to her. It’s also how she reacts to it.

Since Nell has few resources at her disposal, she retreats even more into herself.

The Past is Prologue — Backstory for Nell Murphy

Born after the turn of the 21st century, Nell is fourteen during the entire run of Mettle. She never knows who her father is. Her mother, Julia, overdoses on opioids when Nell is only six. As a result of this harsh childhood, her Gran (Sally Murphy) is raising her.

But her family is far from wealthy. Gran scrimps to get Nell good food and keep a roof over their heads. When the book starts, Gran is having trouble paying the heating bills.

Shy, quiet, and introverted, Nell wants to be anywhere but wherever she is. Feeling undue pressure, she cuts herself.

Like many tweens, she’s mouthy at times, and mumbles at others. Sometimes, she’s responsible. But other times, she slacks off. Just like any other kid of her age.

Description

Nell is small and slight. I see her with straight, stringy mousey brown hair and large eyes. She’s pale, too. Often, she wants to disappear. If I had to describe her with one word, I would say she’s scrawny.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation

Like all of the other characters in Mettle, Nell’s primary motivation is to survive. And she realizes cutting won’t help anything, so she stops voluntarily. It’s one of the more mature things she does throughout the book.

Quotes

In this scene, Nell and Dez (a classmate) are trying to survive with fellow Bostonians Elise, Noah, Mei-Lin, Craig, and Olga. To save fuel and conserve their own human energy, the idea is to combine households.

Even though they were classmates, Dez and Nell barely knew each other before. The others didn’t know her at all. Before, Elise was working as a medical examiner and was acquainted with Mei-Lin, another doctor at the local hospital.

Olga, a Russian immigrant, is the caregiver for Noah’s mother, who has Alzheimer’s.

“Would you both live in the Carter Street house?” Elise asked, point blank. “If you don’t want to, it’s okay. But Nell, you’re right. Combining households will save us fuel.”

“I guess so.” Nell looked down. “It’ll be weird not being around Gran’s things.”

“I could live in the Carter Street house,” Dez said. “I won’t really miss anything back home. My old man saw to that. Anything I really owned or liked can’t be used except the skateboard. The rest is all computers, stuff like that. I had my own TV. That’s a waste now.”

“Bring some of your grandmother’s stuff over if you want to, Nell,” Mei-Lin suggested. “Or your mother’s.”

“I just have one thing from my mom.”

“What that?” asked Olga.

“The burgundy down jacket.”

“She’s kept you warm, then,” Noah said.

“That’s about all she ever did.”

“You don’t have to give us the gory details if you don’t want to,” Craig said.

“No, it’s okay. I don’t mind. My mother OD’d when I was six.”

“Opioids, right?” Elise asked. Nell nodded. “I probably did her autopsy.”

“Julia Murphy.”

“I don’t know. But it wouldn’t shock me.” Elise squeezed the girl’s hand.

Relationships

Nell is very young, so she doesn’t really have much in the way of relationships. Certainly, there’s nothing sexual. She’s probably ace. I’ve mulled that idea over a few times and it’s … possible. But even I’m not 100% sure.

Gran

Nell’s grandmother is the only family she’s got. Gran is mother, father, and tutor to Nell. Because there’s no one else, they are close. But this doesn’t mean Nell is a good little obedient girl.

While she tends to keep quiet about things, she’s still not a perfect little angel, who Gran can rear effortlessly.

Eleanor Braverman

For a few days, Eleanor has the wherewithal to become a more active member of the group. Nell latches onto her immediately, as Gran has gone out of town and there’s no way to know when or even if she’ll ever be back.

Eleanor and Nell read together, and it gets Nell excited about learning in a way she never was before.

Noah Braverman

While Nell and Noah don’t have a lot of scenes together, she comes to love everyone in the group. With the Braverman family, she even takes on their name as a second middle name. In that way, she honors both Noah and his mother.

Craig Firenze

Although they don’t get off on the right foot, Nell comes to appreciate and truly respect Craig. As everything else goes to pot around them, she develops what is not really a crush. It’s more like hero worship. Because Craig offers stability and reassurance when everything else feels hopeless.

Conflict and Turning Point

Like for the other characters in Mettle, the turning point centers around things finally becoming so dire that it seems inevitable that none of them will make it. Nell is the first to really get close to the point of no return.

But she’s also the first to recover, and the first to start to piece together what’s really going on.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

When I had trouble coming up with the name of a side, throwaway character in Time Addicts, I named her Nell. Although that character is Nell Shaw. Otherwise, there’s no connection.

Are There Any Future Plans for Nell Murphy?

I don’t really have any future plans for her, but she’s a character I could see myself revisiting.

Nell Murphy: Takeaways

Don’t count her out. Nell may be small, but she’s mighty all the same. I see my seventh grade self in her.

Nell Murphy — small but fierce.

Want More of Nell and the Rest of Mettle?

If Mettle resonates with you, then check out my other articles about how changes in the periodic table nearly kill us all.

Character Reviews: Mettle

† Eleanor Braverman
• Noah Braverman
† Craig Firenze
• Dez Hunter
† Dr. Elise Jeffries
• Minka Lopez
† Nell Murphy
• Olga Nicolaev
† Dr. Mei-Lin Quan
The Mettle Universe
Self Review: Mettle

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Character Review — TathrelleNew Cover of Untrustworthy by JR Gershen-Siegel, New Cover of Untrustworthy, Tathrelle, Ixalla, Adger, Velexio, Untrustworthy universe

Character Review — Tathrelle

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on July 28, 2022

Consider Tathrelle, One of My Original Characters

Who is Tathrelle?

When I first started to come up with the story which turned into Untrustworthy, I needed a heroine character. My original plan was for her to be the biggest driver of the action. But as the background of the book kept changing, so did my attitude toward her. She took on a more dual heroine role with Ixalla.

Where Did Tathrelle Come From?

In essence, this character first came about because I came up with her name. I loved the idea of a very feminine name like this, which doesn’t feel like it has any sort of history or etymology. I am particularly thrilled because even now, years after I started writing Untrustworthy, you can only find her name as a part of the blurb for this book.

The Past is Prologue — Backstory for Tathrelle

Her backstory enters the book in little bits and pieces. But you only get back to what is likely the day right before the book starts. Without plunging into spoiler territory, she is just plain not what she seems.

But when we first meet her, she’s just won an election. Tathrelle is to be the representative of the common people, their sole voice in the government.

Description

When the book starts, she has brown hair and kind of reddish brown eyes. She also has fewer fingers than we do. And her genitals aren’t in the same place as ours are.

Er, why?

Because she’s not a human at all. In fact, no one in this novel is. She’s a Cabossian, a bipedal species with two genders and two separate types of existence. All that matters on Caboss is if you’re sterile or fertile.

Untrustworthy solely takes place off Earth, and the characters have no inkling that humans so much as exist.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation

Probably her strongest motivation is to tell the people the truth. As the story unfolds, the government gives her more and more required phrasing in her speeches. While they don’t actually dictate everything she has to say, they do horn in on it.

Quotes

The general who was seated to the left of Tathrelle said, “It might mean rioting. We cannot have that. Order must be maintained, at all costs, for the security of Caboss.”

“All too true,” agreed the general on the other side of Tathrelle, “We cannot tell the people the details.”

“But that’s my job,” Tathrelle protested. “They elected me for the singular purpose of telling them the truth about the government – about how it’s run, about how things are going and all of that. If we outright lose the war, it’s going to affect everyone. You cannot tell me not to tell them.”

The general across from her, looking very smug, said, “You heard it; there’ll be rioting if we tell the people. We’ve got to be subtle about this sort of thing. You cannot just blurt it out, as if you were a child telling a secret in a schoolyard.”

“Do not, no, do not tell them all of it,” Velexio cautioned. “In fact, let’s do this, Tathrelle. I’d like for you to tell them that the war is going well and that the Cavirii are in communications with us and that the government needs to concentrate on those communications, so details will not be forthcoming.”

…

Tathrelle looked aghast at Velexio. “Are you suggesting that I lie to the people?”

Relationships

She has a relationship of sorts with the other three characters with the most “screen time”, as it were. That is, Ixalla, Adger, and Velexio.

Tathrelle and Ixalla

We first meet Ixalla early in the piece. She’s married to Tathrelle, and theirs is a loving, sensual kind of marriage. They’re considerate to each other, even though their statuses are very different. Ixalla is a schoolteacher, about to go on maternity leave. But her wife has just won an election to be the people’s representative voice is a militaristic government.

But once their circumstances start to change (again, I am doing my best to avoid spoiling the book!), Tathrelle learns that her position with the government is more as a checked-off box. She’s a token ordinaryish citizen, a canary in a coalmine composed of an alien cabal/junta. But when this happens, Ixalla’s stature rises. A gifted, dedicated teacher, Ixalla complements Tathrelle and together the two are stronger than apart.

Adger

A coworker of Tathrelle’s, he quickly cultivates an obsession with her. And once he starts to get the means at his disposal to change his circumstances with reference to her, he starts to do so immediately. Ethics? Who needs ’em? Amirite? Adger would absolutely say something like that.

As the story continues on, Tathrelle’s status lowers, but Adger’s rises. Much like Tathrelle becomes closer in status to Ixalla, she also becomes closer in status to Adger. But no matter what he tries, he’ll never have the kind of easy, loving relationship with Tathrelle that she has with Ixalla.

Velexio

General Velexio is the leader of the military junta controlling the Cabossian government. Unlike the other three major characters, his status never changes and he remains Tathrelle’s boss. And all he wants to do is manipulate her.

Conflict and Turning Point

For Tathrelle, the turning point happens when she finally starts to learn the truth about what is going on around her. Life is continually changing, and it is most definitely not improving. At the climax of the story, she learns why.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

Given that this is a standalone novel and none of the characters are human, there’s very little to tie the novel to my other universes. About the only connection is the time element, which is also present in the Time Addicts inner trilogy within the Obolonk universe.

Future Plans

I honestly don’t have any for her, and I kind of can’t. About the only thing I can think of is to potentially write of her past, or maybe Ixalla’s? This is also a difficult universe for prequels. We’ll see.

Tathrelle: Takeaways

This character started off with strength but was quickly overwhelmed by the events in the plot. As a result, I wrote her meeker and more submissive. In Untrustworthy, the changes in society are also reflected by the changes in Tathrelle herself—the main character after all.

Tathrelle and her story get a much-needed expansion in the prequel! #staytuned Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon

Want More of Tathrelle and the Rest of Untrustworthy?

If Untrustworthy resonates with you, then check out my other articles about how an alien society devolves into fascism.

Character Reviews: Untrustworthy

• Character Review—Adger
† Character Review—Ixalla
• Character Review—Tathrelle
† a href=”https://janetgershen-siegel.com/character-review-velexio/” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Character Review—Velexio
• Character Review—Student #17

Untrustworthy Universe
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Self-Review – Darkness into LightShort Stories, Road, My Aliens, Last Patient, interview, Surprises, Props, shipwrecked, child, Killing Us Softly, Ditte, Band, three minutes, Longest Night Watch, Nothing Good Ever Happens, Complications, Your Call, Darkness into Light, canaries, gentrification, Cynthia, True Believer, Short Stories, Wilder Bloom, Dish, Gentrification, Mitalisque, kitten, Last Try, Minnesota Wish, Dominick and Angela, Alix, Alix’s Apocalypse, A Chance Encounter in Time, A Crime in Time, A Show for the Galaxy, Aenor the Wanted, Alien Justice, And the Band Played the Apocalypse, Babel 2.0, Side Pages, Camp, Courier to the Soviets, Frozen Assets, Julie's Dollar, Mandy Goes to Aspen, Martin's Choice, Mike’s Grades, Out of the Work Camp Frying Pan, Saddle Up, Bank Teller, Sarah’s Invention, Small Acts of Defiance, The Future Has No Foundation, The Ides of the Secretarial Pool, Unexpected Help, You Will Drink Your Coffee and Like It, Unreliable, East Side of the Universe, Eros vs Thanatos, Dust Between Our Stars, A Show for the Galaxy, A Fairy Tale for Skeptical Adults, A School for Scavengers, Frozen Assets, Out of the Work Camp Frying Pan, 1960s Temporal Crimes, Lizzie Borden is Vital to the Timeline, Walls Came Tumbling Down Again, The End, Will's Dog, Building Trust, Message in an Odd Bottle, Vive André, The New Kid, What's an Animal,

Self-Review – Darkness into Light

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on July 26, 2022

Review – Darkness into Light

One of the best parts of Darkness into Light is that it’s just a catch phrase. Hence, just like ‘good morning’ or ‘hello’, the characters say ‘darkness into light’ all the time. They repeat it continuously within the story.

So I wanted ‘darkness into light’ to be almost like ‘Hello, Comrade’. I needed for it to take on a sinister tone.

And boy, did it ever.

Background for Darkness into Light

With a 1984/Brave New World vibe, the catchphrase turned evil very, very quickly.

The idea behind it was that in a future which might not be so far-fetched, the price of equality is a ton of sameness. And that sameness means going along with the majority in every possible way.

So for this society, there can be no deviations, no exceptions, and no delays.

Because you’ve got to be equal. And not necessarily voluntarily.

Or else.

Plot

Minor government functionary Susan has but one job – to make sure that all of the babies born in the Smith Hospital are the exact same color.

But then she finds a pair faces which don’t fit the approved color scheme. And that’s got to change, fast.

Or else.

Characters

The characters are Susan, a minor government functionary. So there is also the young couple she needs to convert from the dark into the light. Whether they want that to happen, or not.

Memorable Quotes

There were dozens of people in Smith County in Smith State who were all expecting children, and the projection on the wall told the tale. She glanced at the faces briefly. Nearly all of them were already the correct, uniform shade and shape, dimensions perfectly aligned and proportioned as per the law.

Rating

The story has a K rating. But it is a bit disturbing. So, I do caution readers.

Takeaways – Darkness Into Light, Indeed

I really love how quickly and easily I was able to turn Susan into something utterly sinister. Beneath a cheerful, allegedly helpful and caring façade, there is a nasty drive to make every single person conform. Whether they like it or not.

I am so glad that this story found an audience. You can find it on the Corner Bar Magazine website. And this site also published Killing Us Softly.

Darkness into Light. If I’ve done my job right, this phrase should make you shudder. #amediting

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Genre Treatments

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on July 14, 2022

A Look at Genre Treatments in Writing

Let’s start with the most basic of questions. What are genre treatments?

Genre Treatments

When it comes to genre treatments, do you treat horror, science fiction, and romance all the same way? Or do you just stick to one genre and call it a day?

What are Literary Genres?

It might help to understand just what literary genres are. Let’s start with the short one.

Nonfiction

Narrative nonfiction tells a story. Biographies and autobiographies are often more or less subsets of this. While it’s possible to relate a biography in a non-narrative form, that’s pretty rare. Essays are a form of short nonfiction. And speech is pretty self-explanatory. Is it the truth? Then it’s not fiction. Kinda obvious there.

Fiction

But there’s a lot more here. Poetry is usually rhythmic (although it doesn’t have to be) and has evocative imagery. Drama is serious stuff, and it can be a part of theatrical performances.

Humor or Comedy?

Humor is of course the funny stuff. Don’t confuse it with comedy (although we use the terms interchangeably in common parlance). Comedy is just when the protagonist lives at the end of the piece. Contrast that with tragedy, which is where the main character dies by the end. But comedy, traditionally, does not mean something is funny.

By this definition, A Clockwork Orange is a comedy.

Fantasy or Myth?

Science fiction and fantasy are often close. While fantasy is generally more otherworldly, science fiction usually dovetails with possible science, no matter how far-fetched. Fairy tales, in contrast, are generally drawn from folklore. The more general term, folklore, goes beyond stories to songs and proverbs from long ago. Legends, on the other hand, often have a basis in fact. This can be the subject (a national hero, like El Cid) or the plot. A fable is often short, but it always contains a moral lesson. A short story is generally too brief for a subplot.

Realistic fiction is also fairly self-explanatory. It’s fiction which could be real. Historical fiction adds a historical dimension although it’s often also meant to be realistic.

Horror evokes fright and visceral reactions. Tall tales are overly exaggerated and are virtually the opposite of realistic fiction. Mythology is a traditional narrative with a religious or faith-based component. Mystery involves the solving of a crime or uncovering secrets. Finally, fiction in verse is much longer poetry which contains subplots and major themes.

What are generally not considered to be full-blown genres? Young adult, adventure, romance, etc. Hence the idea, for the most part, has more to do with length and execution than subject matter.

How Do You Treat These Genres?

First of all, consider pacing. Horror often slows down, and then speeds up. Mystery might take a while to build to a satisfactory conclusion. Furthermore, mysteries contain red herrings. Myths might contain repetition. Some of that comes from oral tradition. Humor is all about timing. Drama can often be slow and building. Traditional poetry may have a sing-song rhythm. Adventure might have a fairly straightforward line from beginning to end, continually amping up the stakes.

Your Personal Genre Treatments, and Mine

What is your particular spin? Do you use short, choppy sentence to speed up the action? Do you also choose shorter words?

One subtle trick I have learned is to use passive voice when a character is a victim. The way I see it is, if things are happening to a character without their consent, then the subject of any sentences describing that should be deemphasized.

So for me, my way to handle genres varies due to emphasis. While I mostly write in the science fiction genre, it encompasses a ton of differing emphases. A story might be funnier, or sadder. The Real Hub of the Universe is essentially historical fiction done up with science fiction clothes, with mystery thrown in. Whereas the initial Obolonk trilogy is a police procedural/mystery, again wearing the costume of science fiction.

Takeaways

Consider your genre as you write.

Genre treatments are kind of like rules. Follow them, at least to start. But don’t be afraid to break them on occasion.

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… And Facebook for All – Your Profile Page, Part IIFacebook, advertising, account settings, Profile Page Part, Home Page, Working, Facebook, Rest, Facebook versus Forums, Company Pages, offsite sharing, Facebook Page, demystifying Facebook, Facebook Video Ads, Facebook to Allow Users to Login with Less Info, Facebook video ads, Facebook Ads vs. Google, Organic Reach Decline,

… And Facebook for All – Your Profile Page, Part II

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on July 12, 2022

… And Facebook for All – Your Profile Page, Part II

It’s something Facebook members have seen hundreds, if not thousands, of times. It’s your profile page.

Let’s talk some more about your profile. Here’s mine.

In addition to the basic tabs at the top, it also contains:

• A space for your profile picture
† Information on any mutual friends you might share with anyone peeking at your profile
• A small subgroup of your friends
† Your likes
• also, your photos
† Your links
• A share button, and,
† Some ads

NOTE: Facebook continually A/B tests, and so buttons and features move, change, are resized, added, or can disappear altogether. Your neighbor can sometimes see a rather different version of Facebook versus yours.

And this is normal. But these elements have been there for quite a while. It’s a safe bet that many of these account settings will stay on your FB profile page. Although their order and names will probably change.

Let’s look at these in order.

A Space for Your Profile Picture

No one is stopping you from putting up a picture that is not, actually, of you. As a result, I’ve seen dogs on Facebook, scenery, people’s children, and cartoon characters and more. Hence it’s a place to be somewhat expressive.

However, recognize that, if you’re using Facebook at all for your business (or if you’re simply looking for work), you’ll need to tone this down.

If you want to go fairly conservative (which I personally think is best but opinions differ), go with a headshot or a head and shoulders shot that’s fairly recent. And, do make sure you’re smiling.

Mutual Friends

If someone surfs in and finds your Profile Page, they’ll probably be drawn to whether you’re really the person they’re looking for, and whether you have any acquaintances in common.

If you’ve got a somewhat common name (e. g. Gregory Cole), then it’s really going to help out people if they see anyone who you know is in common with whoever they know.

One way I’ve used this information has been in locating High School friends, as we tend to have the same mutual friends.

If I see that Jane Smith is also friends with John Jones and Dave Brown (names are made up, of course), then I realize, aha! Chances are good that Jane and I attended High School together. Or, at least, she’s from my area.

However, sometimes it just means that Jane is a local (if John and Dave stayed in the area after graduation). Or it might mean she’s a younger or older sibling of my classmates. Hence it’s an imperfect system.

A Small Subgroup of Friends

So this is six friends (fewer, if you have fewer than six friends, of course). And it used to be you had control over this, but apparently not anymore.

As Facebook gets larger and larger, aggregations like these start to go the way of the dodo. Why? Because Facebook is really just a big, honkin’ database.

With over 2 billion daily active users, all these displays, with their sorting and re-sorting, are going to get memory intensive rather quickly.

It will never, truly, be a bare bones platform a la X or Bluesky. But you can expect to see some aggregative niceties to go away over time, or to be aggregated even further.

After all, how many times have you seen only the so-called “most relevant” comments instead of all of them when you click on a post. That, my friend, is saving Facebook some valuable memory.

Your Likes

Whenever you click Like on a group or page, it can show up here. A few show up at a time, and they rotate. To take something out of rotation, un-Like it. Much older and inactive pages and groups show up less, as Facebook follows social signals in this area, too.

E. g. pages and groups that appear inactive or even downright abandoned will lose precious visibility time and space to groups and pages that are up to date and lively.

Photos on Your Profile Page

So here is where your profile picture shows up in all its glory, and bigger than on your Home Page. Therefore, make sure it looks good here as well as on your Home Page. What I said above bears repeating.

If you’re using Facebook for business (or if you’re looking for work), make sure your profile image is a flattering photo clearing showing your face. It need not be full-length (and, if it is, it’ll be smaller on the Home Page, but here it’s all visible) and, for God’s sake, smile!

Plus, photographs also show up on your wall if you upload them and agree to publish them to your wall.

Your Links can go on Your Profile Page

So put a link in your status, or post it to your wall, and it will convert to something clickable. And if it comes from Youtube, it’ll even embed the video. And like most things on Facebook, any link can get comments or “Likes”.

A Share Button

Actually, there are several of these. Pretty much everything on Facebook can be shared in one manner or another, and even off Facebook.

Bottom line: your Profile Page is your face to the world. It is clickable, shareable and somewhat searchable. Don’t want people to know something about you? Don’t put it on your Profile Page.

Want More About Facebook?

If my experiences with Facebook resonate with you, then check out my other articles about the largest social network on the planet, by far.

… And Facebook for All

• Demystifying Facebook
† Creating a Facebook page
• Working with a Facebook Page
† … And Facebook for All — Your Profile Page, Part I
• … Your Profile Page, Part II
† Home Page
• … Company Pages
† Offsite Sharing
• All Your Account Settings
† … And Facebook for All
• All the Rest of It
† Advertising on Facebook
• Facebook versus Forums

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Character Review — Trixie LaRueAmie Sikes, who I see as Trixie LaRue

Character Review — Trixie LaRue

Published by Janet Gershen-Siegel on July 5, 2022

Consider Trixie LaRue, One of My Original Characters

But just who is Trixie LaRue?

I’ve had a few “voice of reason”-style characters. Dr. Devon Grace of The Real Hub of the Universe comes to mind. Trixie is another such character. But she’s also amusing, a little like Greg Shapiro in The Obolonk Murders.

The first time I show her in the book, she’s getting drunk with Marnie and Jazminder. And she’s telling them about how a goat chewing on her sleeve ruined a potentially romantic moment with one of the goatherds.

Goats on a spaceship? Why not?

Where Did Trixie LaRue Come From?

Trixie is a great supporting character in The Enigman Cave. I needed a foil for Marnie. But I also wanted someone who would have a kind of larger than life persona.

Her accent comes from a few places. I learned about London, Kentucky when I used to have a job auditing law firms across the country. But I never had occasion to go there.

But her voice? Her accent? Those come from the late mother of my best friend in high school. She had that fabulous accent and was one of the kindest people I have ever known.

The Past is Prologue — Backstory for Trixie LaRue

The character herself explains her backstory. Before the story begins, she and Marnie attend Deep Space training together. They find they’re simpatico and clearly enjoy each other’s company. The misfits of their class, no one else seems to be a part of their orbit.

But that’s okay. Because they’re not in anyone else’s orbit, either.

Description

I like Amie Sikes of Junk Gypsies for Trixie. She’s about the right look and age, with a glint of mischief in her eye. But I do see Trixie as being more of a redhead.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation

Beyond being the voice of reason, Trixie is also a necessary character when Marnie decides on how to try to prove Enigman intelligence—in a JAG court. Marnie is the client in favor. But someone has to be the opponent. And so that’s our gal.

In the below scene in Chapter 6 — The Pretty People, Trixie tells Jazminder Parikh about how she and Captain Marnie Shapiro end up on the Valentina Tereshkova together.

It’s possible that I’ll cut some of this scene. For one thing, it’s long. But for another, It seems like a little much. The brass doesn’t like Marnie. That much is obvious. But does it need quite so much detail?

Quotes

“… in our last semester we were asked to pick three people we wanted to work with. We were also asked which department we wanted to go in if we were in one of the last thirty-two slots. It was kinda obvious nobody but me wanted to work with Marne. Then when we graduated, they started callin’ us by name and by grade. They started with the bottom. I mean, even if you was terrible, you were still pretty gol-darned smart. It was no shame to be at the bottom. So they announced the first forty of the sixty-two people in the class, and they announced your assignment, too.

“The next thirty-eight up were mostly captains and not a lotta first officers, like me. You had to stand while you were waitin’, and it was getting tiresome, I’ll tell ya. But we hadn’t been called yet. Then they said there was someone who was good enough to be a captain but was being commissioned as a first officer on account of personality issues.”

“Personality issues?”

“They wanted people to get along, see? I mean, you’re out here for a decade, it would kinda stink if you hated each other.”

“Right. Go on.”

The Speech

“They called another first officer and then we were into the captains. And Marne and I are still standing there. It’s the last thirty-one people and there are thirty captain slots and one first officer slot left. They get down to fourteen of us and I get called. I am the last of the first officers and I’m assigned here, to the Val. I know Marnie hasn’t been assigned anywhere, and this is the first I’ve heard of anyone going on the Val. There’s a chance but I have no idea.

“They keep announcing people and then they spring it on ‘em that the top of the class has to make a speech. They are in the top ten by this time and everybody’s looking around at each other on account this is the first anybody’s heard of that. And then it’s finally down to two people – Marnie and Bill Levinson. He gets announced as captain of the Jonas Salk and I realize, maybe even before Marne does, that she’s at the top of our class and she’s got me here on the Val.”

Relationships

I have no relationship for her beyond friendship. And friendship counts, of course! Much like the top three big characters in TOS Star Trek, Trixie is a major player. She and Jazzie (Jazminder) are just about as vital as Marnie. Not just to the ship, but to the story itself.

But she is far from a latter-day Vulcan.

Trixie is kind and loyal. She’s the kind of friend anyone would want to have. She has a sister and that’s about it. I otherwise don’t have a lot about her.

Her relationship attempts, though, are in the book. Charlie Hill is a goatherd and she’s got the hots for him. But later, she gets the hots for Hunter Garcia. Hunter runs JAG. So, where does she end up? Possibly with neither of them.

Conflict and Turning Point

For our gal Trixie, the turning point is essentially the turning point of the book. That is, when it becomes obvious that things are going to hell in a handcart at home. So she decides to make a stand. This is along with almost everyone else.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

Trixie is one of the only people in The Enigman Cave who I didn’t name after someone I attended high school with or knew personally in some other way (neither are Marnie or Jazzie).

But she is from somewhere. She’s the name of an ex-girlfriend of a former coworker. I have no idea if the real Trixie LaRue was from Kentucky. But I suspect she wasn’t.

And yeah, I know how gol-darned (Trixie does rub off on you after a while) obscure and out-there that sounds. It was just a name from years ago. I filed it away for later.

Future Plans

Will I ever write a real full-length sequel to The Enigman Cave? After all, I did write a short story sequel…

Trixie LaRue: Takeaways

Funny, smart, supportive, and ultimately brave and kind, Trixie is about the best first officer any spaceship captain could ever want.

But she’s still gonna shoot that sumbitch goat.

Trixie LaRue is not to be trifled with.

Want More of Trixie LaRue and the Rest of The Enigman Cave?

If The Enigman Cave resonates with you, then check out my other articles about how our society handles first contact with a species that may be as primitive as Australopithecus.

Character Reviews: The Enigman Cave

† Marnie Shapiro
• Trixie LaRue
† Jazminder Parikh, MD
• Lex Feldman
† Benjamin Chase
The Enigman Cave Universe
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