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Tag: Enigman Cave

Let’s Take a Trip to the Universe of the Enigman Cave

The Enigman Cave is all about what happens when we find the first multicellular life off Earth. In the meantime, back home, the government is collapsing, and fascism is on the rise.

Are the aliens intelligent, or are they not? Are they on the cusp of developing sapience? Or… not?

But There’s More…

The story is also about a long-term space mission. How do people get along? What makes it tick? What happens when people divorce or just plain get on each other’s nerves?

And it’s also about female friendship, and is probably the best and most detailed study of female friendship I have ever written.

In fact, many of the top people on board are women. In this way, it flips the script on a lot of space opera.

On the Ground

For Marnie, Trixie, Jazminder, Ben, Tom, Lex, and all the others, the Enigmans are fascinating. They are truly the culmination of all the searching they have been doing — for years!

But at the same time, they are, understandably, rather alien. What are they thinking? Are they mainly driven by instinct or perhaps emotion? Or is a form of intelligence driving them and their behaviors?

When the crew initially does not see or hear the Enigmans communicating, it seems as if they are a lot closer to apes than humans. Some of their choices seem strange, and even dangerous.

Are they reckless? Uninformed? Do they have a death wish? Or are they simply doing the very best that they can, with the meager resources they have?

For Enigma, while rich in gold, doesn’t seem to be rich in much else.

But Back to It…

Can we meet aliens without destroying them?

And can we stand up to our new, tyrannical government, without compromising our values?

Or are we destined to become like Cortes and the Aztecs, and grind a nascent civilization into dust?

Character Review — Astrid Hennigsen

Consider Astrid Hennigsen, One of My Original Characters

So, who is Astrid Hennigsen?

The communications officer on the Valentina Tereshkova is a vital part of The Enigman Cave. Although she’s nowhere near a main character (or a very high level supporting character), a lot of her actions drive the plot.

But as she would probably say, she’s just doing her job.

Where Did Astrid Hennigsen Come From?

Whenever you think of space opera, I think it’s inevitable to think at least a little bit about Star Trek. At least I do.

And, as a result, the series which are earlier in the timeline all have communications officers. But once you get to TNG, that role starts to fade, in favor of Operations or Counseling.

Someone still opens a channel, someone still announces that, “the hailing frequencies are open”, and someone inevitably answers calls, particularly generalized ones just sent to the ship itself.

But the role has changed in terms of acting as well. These characters (such as Tasha Yar) do more than just answer the phone.

When you go back to much earlier in the Trek timeline, the communications officer’s job is a lot harder, and it’s full-time. In Enterprise, Hoshi Sato tries to do translations on the fly. In TOS and Strange New Worlds, Nyota Uhura is the heart and soul of the ship.

And in Discovery, Ronald Bryce and William Christopher are efficient linguists, even as the time shifts from pre-TOS to the deep future.

These people are more than just computer jockeys.

The Past is Prologue — Backstory for Astrid Hennigsen

All of this being said; however, the last thing I wanted was for Astrid to be someone who is almost preternaturally gifted. She would be highly competent, but not in the sort of way where it’s not believable.

Astrid, in some ways, is someone I see as being kind of like your cousin who’s good at languages.

One bit of information I need to make clearer in editing is that she doesn’t necessarily want to be on the Val, working for Marnie. At one point, Marnie even says that this wasn’t Astrid’s first choice for an assignment.

But what was? I confess even I am not sure. But I don’t really see her as someone selfish enough to have wanted to work with someone pretty, just to advance her career. I don’t think Astrid is shallow like that.

Since Rosa Perrault got more depth in the prequel, maybe that could answer the question. Hmm. If Astrid wanted to work with Rosa, then she most likely wouldn’t see working for Marnie as being some sort of step down.

Astrid Hennigsen, a Description

Ethereally light and somewhat Scandinavian-looking, Astrid is also like your cousin who seems to get a sunburn just about whenever the weather is anything but a solar eclipse.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation

Astrid wants to do the right thing and do her work well. But at the same time, she also wants to make big discoveries and talk to aliens.

To her credit, she knows her role extremely well, and does not wish to step over anyone to get ahead.

Quotes {The Species they’ve found appears to be primitive; Astrid helps confirm that here}

Astrid said, “There’s even a third thing we know about the Enigmans.”

Marnie turned to her. “What is it, Astrid?”

“I’ve been listening and scanning for any sign of communications. Not just on Enigma but I’ve also been checking for anything coming from anywhere. And not just radio—I’ve been looking in the visible and invisible spectra. The light here is the same as the light on Earth or the Vega System or anywhere, really. I haven’t found anything. I’m not just looking for video or anything like that or listening for the top forty hits. I’m trying to discern patterns. If anyone ever tries to communicate, they have to be expecting that a receiver will understand them. To my mind, that means patterning. Even complicated patterning.”

“What did you find?” Peggy shifted from foot to foot, looking almost as peeved as Ben.

“I found nothing. There are no communications going on out here, just a few random tangent waves which are meaningless. They’re just a function of our orbit. The Enigmans don’t have transmissions of any sort. At least, none I can reasonably detect.”

Relationships

I did not give her any relationships. Sorry, character!

Conflict and Turning Point

Much like with the other characters in the story, the main turning point for Astrid, where she really crosses the veritable Rubicon, is when she agrees to disobey direct orders from Earth.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

While her look is rather similar to that of Ceilidh O’Malley, I don’t really have any other connections across universes for Astrid.

Future Plans for Astrid Hennigsen

She was barely in the prequel, although if I want to lean into her wanting to work with Rosa, I could potentially make them cordial. But I don’t think that’s necessary right now. Not every single question has to have an answer.

I need to remind myself of that, at times.

Astrid Hennigsen: Takeaways

This smart, cheerful communications officer brings in information and interprets it in ways which other characters cannot, and drives the plot while doing so. She is a 100% necessary character!


Want More of Jazminder Parikh and the Rest of The Enigman Cave?

If The Enigman Cave resonates with you, then please be sure to check out my other blog posts about how our society handles first contact with a species that may be as primitive as Australopithecus.

Character Reviews: The Enigman Cave

Marnie Shapiro
Trixie LaRue
Jazminder Parikh, MD
Lex Feldman
Benjamin Chase

The Enigman Cave Universe
Next blog post

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Self-Review – Bet on Marnie

Let’s Look at Bet on Marnie

How did Mariana Shapiro Chase get into space? She had to beat the odds. But never count her out. Always bet on Marnie.

I wrote this story during the fourth quarter of 2024. It is the first story that I designated as #30Day50K. It serves as a prequel to The Enigman Cave. One thing that I am rather pleased with is that it bolsters the main storyline rather nicely.

And, with some of the storyline covered here, I can probably edit the original a lot more ruthlessly. Which, I am certain, is a really good idea.

When I am through with both of these stories, they will most likely look a lot different.

Background

To make my life easier as I continue to try to come up with a detailed and reasonable third Obolonk trilogy, I decided to write prequels for my major properties. These would work from 2022 until at least 2025 and potentially into 2026 or 2027.

Hey, I can find all sorts of fun ways to procrastinate, heh.

Plot

Marnie’s life takes a turn as she gets into Deep Space Training School while her marriage founders. Complicating matters is the fact that the government, which runs the school, has superficial preferences for people who are young and pretty.

But they don’t know Marnie.

Characters

The characters are Marnie Shapiro Chase, Ben Chase, Harrison N’Beki, Patricia (Trixie) LaRue, Rosa Perrault, Missy Mahoney, Don Chandler, and a number of candidates for deep space exploration.

Memorable Quotes {This is the First Time We See Ben Chase}

It was nearly three in the morning when she heard the sound of the front door unlocking in response to Ben inserting his key card.

She got up and met him in the front hall. “Well?”

“Well, what?” Ben slurred. He reeked of scotch and soda.

If you weren’t so damned fine-looking, I’d have had it out with you long ago. “Well, where have you been?”

“You didn’t get my texts?”

To humor him, she checked her tablet. “The most recent text from you is from four days ago. Your ultra-romantic message was that you wanted me to pick up Cornish game hens.”

“Oh. Well, then it was a voice mail.” Ben staggered into the house. Mariana shut the door behind him as he lurched for the bathroom.

Mariana pressed on the tan card on her lanyard, and it lit up for a moment. It was an amber color, signifying older messages but nothing since she had last checked. “My last voice mail from you was from a week ago. You told me you didn’t want to go to Hilton Head, and I quote, ‘Deal with that kid.’ You’re so paternal.” God, I hope you can recognize sarcasm in your current state. But I’m not holding my breath on that.

“Maybe it was a, an email. Yes, that’s what they’re called. Did you move the toilet, or something?”

Mariana got behind him. She took him by the shoulders and marched him into the bathroom. “No, I did not move the toilet, for fuck’s sake. You are totally plastered, Ben.” God, I hope you’re not going to get sick on me. The last time you did, I had to get robotic help to clean up the place.

Rating for Bet on Marnie

The story has a T rating. There are a few moments, including a few with people being found in flagrante delicto. Plus, there’s some swearing, including in the sample, above. So, if such things bother you, proceed at your own risk, I suppose.

Takeaways for Bet on Marnie

I like this story a lot, and I feel it conveys a lot of what the actual deep space program is like. Plus, it delves deeply into Marnie and Ben’s marriage in a way that I didn’t do so when I was originally writing The Enigman Cave.

And as I look at it, it strikes me that, first off, I can edit out quite a bit of it. There is quite simply way too much detail on the courses they take. But at the same time, I believe there are likely to be places where scenes or quotes can work with either story.

Hence, editing both may turn out to be something I do at the same time. And, I suspect each will trade with the other, almost making two different stories. We shall see.

Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon

Want More of my Short Stories and Novellas?

If this story resonates with you, then I hope you will check out some of my other blog posts about my shorter works.

Finally, for a complete list of my shorter works, please be sure to check out the Hub Page—Short Stories.

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Character Review — Benjamin Chase

Let’s Consider Benjamin Chase, One of My Original Characters

So, who is Benjamin Chase?

For The Enigman Cave to work, I needed for Marnie to be not only okay with space but downright happy to be there. But one of the flies in the ointment would be her ex.

And while Ben may be almost a negative version of a Mary Sue, he does have his moments, one of which is in the Quotes section. Besides, it’s more than a little bit fun to write a character who is perpetually pissed off. Or, at least, he seems to be.

Where Did Ben Chase Come From?

To round out the cast and give Marnie a smaller antagonist before getting to the bigger one, I came up with the idea of an ex. And, originally, because I named her Marnie Chase, I first thought that I would have her catch him cheating and divorce him in the book.

Then I thought better of it, and made them already split as early as page one.

The Past is Prologue — Backstory for Benjamin Chase

David Strathairn, who I see as Benjamin Chase.
By Keith McDuffee from Northborough, MA, USA – FlickrUploaded by stemoc, CC BY 2.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=30832011

The chief botanist on board the Valentina Tereshkova is a necessary part of the crew. Brilliant and handsome, you can almost forgive Ben’s flaws. Almost.

But he’s hard to deal with under the best of circumstances. His original tolerance for Marnie was due to her intellect. But their marriage was stormy at best.

Description

In the book, I describe him as, … “tall and slender, with dark hair gone gray at the temples. A few lines on his face added character and interest, and dark eyes could hold nearly anyone’s attention. They had certainly held Marne’s attention, back in the day.”

My husband suggested David Strathairn for the look, and I have to agree.

However, this actor doesn’t seem to have played too many villains. But Ben isn’t exactly a villain. He’s more like a thorn in Marnie’s side than anything else.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation

The smartest guy in the room should have been happy with the smartest woman in the room. But Ben’s not so secret dirty little secret is that he’s a philanderer.

And in a ‘blink and you’ll miss it’ moment, Marnie’s thoughts tell the reader that he’s a serial philanderer. I get into this a lot more in the prequel.

When things really hit the fan, he doesn’t get a comeuppance although Marnie does eventually dress him down. For Ben won’t act like a hero. But he can act a little less like a whiny brat. Marnie takes what she can get.

Quotes

A few minutes later, Chase stomped in. “You know I’m not on the bridge crew.” He glared at his ex-wife. “And who the hell sent me a picture of a bunch of chlorophyll?”

“Chlorophyll?” asked Ray. The others just stared.

“Yes! Goddamned chlorophyll. I don’t have time for these shenanigans,” Chase huffed.

“Ben,” Marnie looked him in the eye, “are you absolutely certain that’s chlorophyll?”

“I know chlorophyll when I see it. Every botanist does.”

“And the chemical formula, Tom, what do you have on your screen?”

“C fifty-five, H seventy-two, Oh five, N four, M-G.”

“That, C-whatever stuff,” Marnie said. “Is that chlorophyll?”

“Yes.” Chase was even more peeved. “Everybody past basic Biochemistry knows that.”

“They never found it off Earth though, eh?” Marnie played her trump card.

“What?”

“Here,” Astrid punched up another picture. “This is the atmosphere of the world we’re orbiting.”

Ben leaned over and looked through the scope at the Scientific station. “Well, I’ll be damned.” He, too, was slack-jawed. “We, we found it.”

“You sure?” asked Marnie.

“Yes,” Chase was threatening to become as shell-shocked as Marnie and Tom were. “Algae can have chlorophyll. They’re technically unicellular. But they, they live communally. I, I would say they, they count as, as multicellular.”

“Remember where you were, remember what you were thinking and, and how you felt,” Marnie said. “Because this is goddamned history.”

Relationships

Aloof and often intolerant, Ben still has two significant relationships.

Marnie Shapiro

In a stormy, meeting of intellects type of marriage, Ben isn’t the kind of affectionate and caring person that Lex Feldman is. Because she’s such a laid back person, she tolerates his shenanigans until they turn into obvious, undeniable philandering.

I think of them almost like Peter O’Toole and Katharine Hepburn in The Lion in Winter, where there’s a lot of verbal sparring. In a way, I can almost see Ben and Marnie with cocktails in hand, at some swanky New York party, continually insulting one another. But in real life, of course, this is exhausting at the best of times.

Kristen Watson

The head nurse on the Val is one of Ben’s conquests and the last woman he was sleeping with before the divorce became finalized. Perky, young, and almost regretting the affair, she is everything he is not.

In particular, he’s not a fan of children—yet she becomes pregnant anyway. Oops.

Conflict and Turning Point

Much like with the rest of the Enigman cast, Ben’s turning point happens a few times. Once, when the planet and its riches are discovered, but also when the government of Earth collapses.

But he doesn’t take a brave stand or anything. He just becomes a little less of a pain in the patoot.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

He doesn’t really have any. The only continuity I had for him was in the prequel story. And in there, you see a lot more about his philandering and aloofness there.
Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon

Future Plans for Benjamin Chase

For the 2025 #30Day50k, I wrote a prequel in the Enigman universe. Ben was there and the reader sees their marriage a bit. But I didn’t want that story to turn into just a constant bitchfest for the two of them. That was not the plot.

At the same time, though, his story intertwines with hers, and that was the time to tell it.

Benjamin Chase: Takeaways

This character is vital to the storyline and particularly vital for Marnie’s own personal growth as a character. But a real person like Benjamin Chase would be annoying as hell.

Benjamin Chase — proving even whiny people can sometimes be heroes. But only when it suits them.


Want More of Benjamin Chase and the Rest of The Enigman Cave?

If The Enigman Cave resonates with you, then please be sure to check out my other articles about how our society handles first contact with a species that may be as primitive as Australopithecus.

Character Reviews: The Enigman Cave

Marnie Shapiro
Trixie LaRue
Jazminder Parikh, MD
Lex Feldman
Benjamin Chase

The Enigman Cave Universe
Next article

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Self-Review – Surprises

Review – Surprises

Surprises was one of those weird little stories which I did not expect to write. I thought The Enigman Cave was done and dusted.

So it’s a sequel of sorts to The Enigman Cave.

Background to Surprises

The background is that Marnie and company are on their way back to Earth. So it is not going to be easy going. Marnie is well aware the reception they get might not be such a great one. In fact, it could even be a death trap.

The Plot of Surprises

And the plot is, well, there isn’t too much of one. Essentially, Marnie and her pals get drunk, much like at the start of The Enigman Cave. But in this instance, they are worried about how the Earth is. And so Marnie ends up an emotional mess.

But keep in mind, it was a requirement of this anthology to add two specific elements. I had to add a towel and the number 42. So this was in keeping with the anthology’s Douglas Adams theme. For this space opera, it did not lend itself too well to either Easter egg.

Characters

The characters are Captain Marnie Shapiro and her first officer, Trixie LaRue, and the chief medical officer, Jazminder Parikh. Assistant Veterinarian Lex Feldman shows up. But it’s botanist Ben Chase who gets the most time – and he isn’t even “on screen”.

Memorable Quotes from Surprises

“We got ourselves a gol-darned party here,” LaRue said, her accent betraying every moment of a rural Kentucky upbringing. “Booze ‘n dancing girls.”

“Just the one dancing girl,” Parikh said, doing a little swishing step and then a twirl which made her lab coat fly out a little bit, like the barest approximation of a whirling dervish. Her accent, in marked contrast to LaRue’s, was the posh product of a fine education in Leeds and a childhood in a wealthy suburb of Hyderabad.

“Jazzie, you sound plummier than usual,” Marnie said. “How much of that have you had so far?” She waved a bit at the bottle.

“I’ve had just enough to make me all right with it being chardonnay and not merlot. It’s alcohol for the damned hoi polloi, even worse than that white zinfandel rubbish. It’s a sorry sop for the masses.” She stabbed the air with a finger. “But at least it’s posher than that six.”

Rating

The story has a K+ rating. While no hanky panky occurs “on screen”, there are certainly references to it. Plus, there is a bit of bad language and a brief bit of nudity at the end. However, I don’t describe the nudity in any way. So it’s just … there.

Upshot

It was great when 42 and Beyond published Surprises. But the anthology is no more. It only lives on in memory and in a few scattered books and Amazon Kindle files. A pity, as that one did extremely well on Amazon, hitting #3 in its Amazon category.

The biggest surprises for me was the chance to write this story at all. #amwriting


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How to Create a Writer Website: Writer SEO

No one will know about your awesome writer website if you don’t start to pay attention to writer SEO.

And without all the connections on your website you could be making, guess what happens? You miss will out on sales. And you may also miss out on places where you can appear and promote your book. Or libraries where you can have your book.

Note: this is an overview and not the details of any form of SEO, even writer SEO. That would take up a few hundred blog posts at least.

Why Does Writer SEO Matter?

Have you ever wondered how and why the results you get in a search are in the order they’re in? Yes, some of this has to do with paid advertising. But budgets are not infinite. Or, at least, they aren’t for most of us.

But SEO is, in a way, a form of free advertising. Optimizing for search means your post gets placed further up on search results. And that’s good. But is it good enough?

Page 1 or Die

Writer SEO - Sweet Brown saying, ain't nobody got time for that, illustrating the concept of writer SEO
Preach, Sweet Brown.

We live in a hurry-up, impatient, “ain’t nobody got time for that” world. And a good 90% or more of us never bother with the second page of search results!

So, while positive changes in position are nothing to sneeze at, they do not truly matter unless you’re on page 1 of results.

If that seems unfair, odd, and maybe even a reason why the human race is doomed, well, I’m with ya on that.

Yet our preferences do not matter.

Ads Are Outta Control!

But… there’s one problem with writer SEO or really any kind of SEO. We’re all gunning for page 1. And that means that the competition is fierce.

There’s you, me, and large corporations with insanely big budgets. There are people who’ve been doing SEO since before it had a name (or at least it feels that way).  So, how do you compete?

I Got an Itch for a Niche

Exxon is enormous! Their annual ad budget may very well be more than everything I have ever made in my life. And probably ever will.

But they’re not competing in the writing space. Even if their CEO decided to write a book, they would not be my competition. And they might not even really be my competition if their CEO decides to try their hand at writing something in the exact same genre as me.

Is James Patterson my competition? Well, not exactly. Yes, we are both writers. But that’s where the comparison stops. Now, Patterson does write science fiction. But are we really in direct competition? For one thing, a lot of his sci fi stuff is aimed at teens. Mine … is not.

So, maybe I don’t have to worry about him, or at least not too much. Same with JK Rowling and Stephen King, particularly as they don’t really write in my genre.

I’ve Got a Niche to Scratch

Amazon is great about having separate categories which match a ton of niches. Consider horror. Even if vampires, werewolves, wendigos, mummies, and serial killers were all in the same novel or film, so what? They all still have their own sub-niches (if you will) within horror.

Science fiction has a number of well-known niches:

• Space opera – this is like Star Trek. My novel The Enigman Cave fits this niche, as it’s also following people on a spaceship.
† Dystopian – this is like Ready Player One. My novels Mettle and Untrustworthy both fit this niche, even though they’re set in different places.

• Science fiction noir – this is like Blade Runner or I, Robot, where cops and science fiction mix. My Obolonk and Time Addicts trilogies both fit. This is not a large genre and Amazon does not have it as a filter. But the good news is that there might not be a lot of competition…
† Time travel – this is like the old TV show, The Time Tunnel. Time Addicts fits this niche.
• Historical science fiction – now, this one’s tricky.

Issues with Historical Science Fiction

Science fiction isn’t normally set too far in the past. Even Stranger Things just goes back to the 1980s.

Without getting into Steampunk, one of the only examples I can think of are the films Time After Time (where HG Wells himself has to chase Jack the Ripper in the modern era) and Somewhere in Time (1970s playwright Richard Collier goes to the turn of the 20th century via hypnosis and falls in love with actress Elise McKenna).

In both stories, someone in the present is writing about the past. It makes sense that it would be a vehicle for a time travel story.

My Real Hub of the Universe trilogy fits this niche of a niche, which is so small that Amazon doesn’t list it as a genre (although at least GoodReads does!). And looking it up often means you find science fiction books written earlier in history, such as The Island of Dr. Moreau.

As a result, when you put that kind of work onto Amazon or the like, your tags and keywords had better be pitch-perfect and utterly on point.

Your Writer Website and Your Niche(s)

I’m not the only author who writes in more than one niche. In fact, many authors who do so will use a pen name or even several pen names.

So, for someone like me, writer SEO means looking at competition in all of these niches. And it means looking at the keywords which the more successful posts (the ones at the top of search, which don’t necessarily belong to bestselling authors) are using.

Keyword Research for Writer SEO

People who do SEO for a living are researching keywords pretty much all the time. It’s a fancy way of trying to determine what people are looking for. If you can give it to them, then you want them to be able to find you.

The closer what’s on your website matches their search, the higher up (usually) your content will be in search engine results.

Google’s mission is to match seeker and website owner as closely as possible. Because if a person has a good experience with Google, they’re more likely to use Google than, say, Bing.

As a result, Google can charge more for its advertising (and yes, unfortunately, paid ads are dominating the first page of search results. So page 2 can get some love after all—but never settle for anything lower).

Synonyms and Intent

To use an example a different form of art, consider film. Or cinema. AKA movies. Or pictures. AKA Hollywood or Bollywood or the Oscars or BAFTA awards, etc.

What is the difference in intent between these two searches:

† movie for kids not Disney
• classic cinema for children

Now, they both pull up lists of movies for the younger set. But the first is more likely to pull up articles about The Land Before Time, whereas the latter might pull up blog posts about The Red Balloon. Between the two searches, the first is more likely to pull up animation, too.

Now consider your books. I’ll use the Time Addicts trilogy as an example.

† time travel with robots
• science fiction noir in the far future

Both searches would fit this trilogy. The first gets a lot more hits. But the latter pulls up much more closely-related stuff. And if I change the first one to time travel with aliens (which would also fit Time Addicts), it gets me TV programs about ancient aliens.

What’s a better set of keyword phrases (kwps) to target? Probably some mix of these:

† science fiction noir
• sci fi noir
† science fiction set in the far future
• time travel noir (although currently there are two kinds of returns on this search which are coming up a lot)

Writer SEO, Searches, and Your Buyer Persona

Who’s your ideal reader? Your ideal customer? You have got to market directly to them. And you will need to write your blog and pages, etc. with that person in mind.

If your ideal reader didn’t finish high school, then a term like movies is more likely to work than cinema. And if your ideal reader is female, you may want to toss in terms like feminism or strong female character.

If your ideal reader is a member of the LGBTQ+ community, then you will need to use terms which will apply—but I would caution you to be careful here. Terms evolve quickly.

What was acceptable in 1999 is not necessarily going to fly in 2023. And for God’s sake, don’t try to reclaim a slur unless you would be a subject of said slur. And even then?

Just, don’t.

Writer SEO: Takeaways

Like I said above, this barely scratches the surface. Try tools like Keywordtool.io, answerthepublic.com, and MarketMuse (or Surfer SEO, Ubersuggest, or AhRefs) for more advanced ways to better target your ideal reader.Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon


Want More of Writer Website Development?

If my post on website SEO and speed resonates with you, then be sure to check out my other articles about how to create a writer website.

Writer Website Development

How to Create a Writer Website: Start a Writer Website
How to Create a Writer Website: What to Write About
Writer SEO
How to Create a Writer Website: Writer Website Copyright
How to Create a Writer Website: Writer Website Design
Mobile Design
How to Create a Writer Website: Writer Website User Experience Design
How to Create a Writer Website: Writer Website Speed and More UX Design
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Get your author website going the smart way and use SEO! #amwriting

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Character Review — Jazminder Parikh, MD

Consider Jazminder Parikh, One of My Original Characters

Who is Jazminder Parikh?

Like in the original Star Trek series, the top three characters are the captain, the first officer, and the chief medical officer.

In short, Marnie, Trixie, and Jazzie.

I see actress Aarti Mann as Jazminder Parikh.

Where Did Jazminder Parikh Come From?

It was not until Star Trek Discovery that I actually saw anyone from the Indian subcontinent anywhere in the franchise. And that is just ridiculous!

I mean, India is the second-most populous country in the world. And it has been for years. There are a good four times as many people there as there are in the United States.

So, why weren’t any of them seeing the stars?

Therefore, I took the old idea to heart. If you don’t see someone in fictional media, then write them yourself.

Of course, this is not my personal experience. But I still wanted this character to get on screen.

The Past is Prologue — Backstory for Jazminder Parikh

Jazzie is from a wealthy family in Hyderabad. But she attended school in Leeds, England. Hence, her accent is a lot more posh British with a mix of Indian.

Also, she does not join the crew of the Valentina Tereshkova until later. At the time of The Enigman Cave, she’s already been ensconced for years. But she doesn’t come out of the same school as Marnie and Trixie.

As for family, the only person she ever mentions is her father. This leads to the conclusion that her mother is likely to be dead.

Description

A bit short, and with very long, dark, straight brown hair, Jaz is younger than Trixie and Marnie. Since Marnie is 53 when the book starts, Jazzie is what, … forty? Maybe. I confess I never gave her an actual birth year. Oops.

She is also a bit of an alcoholic. While she, Marnie, and Trixie get drunk in the first chapter, that’s not the only time for Jazzie. In fact, she even drinks to the point of passing out. As a doctor, of course she should know better.

But it’s also the future, so she has plenty of ways to cure a hangover.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation

Much like for the rest of the Val‘s crew, Jazzie’s main motivation is to explore space and find multicellular life. And, at the same time, assure that everyone stays healthy. Once the crew discover the Enigmans, her purpose shifts, as does everyone else’s.

Now, her motivation is to protect the Enigmans at all costs. Jazzie even goes so far as to perform an emergency c-section and even an autopsy. She ends up invested in their fate.

Quotes

Jaz drained the dregs in the bottle. “Superb. Can I tell you something? I would tell Ginny but she’s not here. Pity, that.” She was starting to slur.

“Just how much wine have you had, Jaz?”

“There may have been an earlier bottle. But I am not going to tell you that.”

Marnie had to smile at that. “Your statement, Doctor?”

“My, oh my but we are formal! As I was saying, you are the best damned boss I have ever had.”

“I am?”

“Absolutely. The other captains? They are all a bunch of sticks-in-the-mud, so far as I am concerned. And they may very well be playing along with that awful Carter. But you! Look at you! You’re strong and capable and I won’t say anything about your dodgy knee, and your preference for much younger veterinarians and your poor dye job.”

Marnie held a lock of her hair for a second. “Gwen did this, not me. How much of that other bottle did you have?”

“Oh hush, you.”

“C’mon, Jaz, you shouldn’t be drinking this much.”

“I am off shift, and am perfectly capable, young lady. Now, as I was saying,” Jaz slurred more, “You are an incomparable supervisor.” She clumsily hugged Marnie and patted her hair a few times.

“Jazzie, are you hitting on me?”

“No, you stupid cow!”

“What?” Marnie started laughing. “If you call me any more nasty names, I’ll stop believing you think I’m the greatest boss of all time.”

“No, no, you are the best damned boss I ever had. Now pay attention!” Jaz swayed and dropped to the floor.

Relationships

The only romantic relationship I have for her is with Ginny Carey. But when the book starts, she reveals they have broken up.

With over a thousand people on the Val, Jaz could conceivably find someone else if she wanted to. But I don’t have her do that. By the end of the book, Marnie is trying to get the two women to reconcile.

I like to think that they do.

Conflict and Turning Point

Much like with just about everyone else on the Val, her turning point comes when Carter emerges as a serious threat. This directly affects Jaz, as she loses contact with her father and fears the worst.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

There really are no continuities or Easter eggs with her. What you see, is what you get. She isn’t intended to be related to another Indian character of mine, Akanksha Kondapalli, from the first Obolonk trilogy.
Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon

Future Plans

She was not really a part of the planned prequel until pretty close to its end. Otherwise, I do not have plans for her.

Jazminder Parikh: Takeaways

There may have been some missed opportunities with this character. And I may end up rectifying them in editing and rewrites. She’s smart and capable, a lot more than a stethoscope, a bottle, or a failed relationship.

Jazminder Parikh — this posh doctor brooks no nonsense.


Want More of Jazminder Parikh and the Rest of The Enigman Cave?

If The Enigman Cave resonates with you, then please be sure to check out my other articles about how our society handles first contact with a species that may be as primitive as Australopithecus.

Character Reviews: The Enigman Cave

Marnie Shapiro
Trixie LaRue
Jazminder Parikh, MD
Lex Feldman
Benjamin Chase

The Enigman Cave Universe
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Writing Progress Report – Fourth Quarter 2022

Progress Report – Fourth Quarter 2022

How was fourth quarter 2022 for writing? It was a continuation of third quarter 2022, more or less.

So I spent fourth quarter 2022 preparing for and writing for NaNo, and then I was going to be editing The Real Hope of the Universe , but that has had to wait for next quarter. So there was that…

Fourth Quarter 2022 Posted Works

First of all, I worked on NaNoWriMo. Either I was preparing for it, or I was writing it. NaNo this year consisted of two prequel works. One was for the Real Hub universe (that one got very long) and the other was for the Obolonk universe, more specifically as a Time Addicts prequel. These are called The East Side of the Universe and The Dust Between Our Stars, respectively.

Then on Wattpad I posted on the WattNaNo profile and nowhere else. Also, I gave up running the Star Trek profile. I just plain do not have the time any more.

Milestones

Also, I have written over 3.4 million words (fan fiction and wholly original fiction combined). Another 120,000 in original words, and I will have finally surpassed fan fiction. Yeah, I really did write that much fan fic! The below is but the tip of that particular iceberg. So right now my stats on Wattpad for wholly original works are as follows:

• Dinosaurs – 40 reads, 9 comments
† How to NaNoWriMo – 25,946 reads, 340 comments
• My Favorite Things (like kibble) – 983 reads, 133 comments
Revved Up – 59,435 reads, 531 comments
• Side By Side – 17 reads, 2 comments
† Social Media Guide for Wattpad – 15,812 reads, 592 comments
• The Canadian Caper – 506 reads, 37 comments
The Dish – 250 reads, 24 comments
• There is a Road – 189 reads, 28 comments
† WattNaNo’s Top Picks 2018 – 1,967 reads, 45 comments
• WattNaNo’s Top Picks 2019 – 1,845 reads, 10 comments
† What Now? – 2,764 reads, 104 comments

More Published Works

Also, I am amassing quite the collection of published works!

Untrustworthy, which is my first published novel. So yay!

A True Believer in Skepticism, published in Mythic Magazine.

Almost Shipwrecked, a story in the January 2019 edition of Empyreome, a site which unfortunately is no more.

Canaries, a short story in the March 29, 2019, edition of Theme of Absence.

Complications, a story in the Queer Sci Fi Discovery anthology. So this is an anthology where the proceeds went to supporting the QSF website.

Cynthia and Wilder Bloom, stories in the Longest Night Watch II anthology.

Props, a story in the Longest Night Watch I anthology. So this is an anthology where the proceeds go to Alzheimer’s research.

Surprises, a story in Book One of the 42 and Beyond Anthology set.

The Boy in the Band, a story in the Pride Park anthology. So this is an anthology where the proceeds go to the Trevor Project.

The Interview, the featured story in the December 14, 2018 edition of Theme of Absence. So they even interviewed me!

The Last Patient, a story in the Stardust, Always anthology. This was an anthology where the proceeds go to cancer research.

The Resurrection of Ditte, a story in the Unrealpolitik anthology.

This is My Child, a short story published in the April 8, 2019 edition of Asymmetry Fiction, another site which is no more.

Three Minutes Back in Time, a short story published in Mythic Magazine.

Killing Us Softly, a short story published in Corner Bar Magazine.

Darkness into Light, a short story published in Corner Bar Magazine.

WIP Corner

So my current WIPs are as follows:

The Obolonk Murders Trilogy – so this one is all about a tripartite society. But who’s killing the aliens?

The Enigman Cave – can we find life on another planet and not screw it up? You know, like we do everything else?

The Real Hub of the Universe Trilogy – so the aliens who live among us in the 1870s and 1880s are at war. But why is that?

Mettle – so it’s all about how society goes to hell in a hand basket when the metals of the periodic table start to disappear. But then what?

Time Addicts – No One is Safe – so this one is all about what happens in the future when time travel becomes possible via narcotic.

Time Addicts – Nothing is Permanent – this is the second in this trilogy. What happens when time is tampered with and manipulated in all sorts of ways? It’s the ultimate in gaslighting, for one thing.

Time Addicts – Everything is Up For Grabs – as the timelines smack together and continue to diverge, it gets harder to tell the “real” timeline from all the newer fake ones. And what if some of the changes are for the better?

Fourth Quarter 2022 Prep Work

So currently, my intention, for 2024’s NaNoWriMo, is to write the third trilogy in the Time Addicts/Obolonks universe. But I need to iron out the plot! So a lot of this year has been spent on that. I have no name for this one yet.

For 2023 NaNoWriMo, I have decided to create a prequel for two or three more of the five main universes: Obolonks (while the Obolonks and Time Addicts are in the same universe, I just plain want to write two separate prequels!), Untrustworthy, The Enigman Cave, and Mettle.

If 2023 NaNo goes like 2022 NaNo did, then whichever one I do first will end up sticking to the script and complete relatively early, and then the second one will … meander.

If I had to choose two which would fill the bill in that fashion, it would either be Untrustworthy + Obolonks or Mettle + Enigman Cave. This is mainly because the first in each pairing are relatively well-defined, whereas the second of the pairings? Eh, not so much.

So, I anticipate a lot of fun and perhaps a little confusion. But it’s all good! And if I play my cards right, I can do the final pairing in 2024 and put off prepare the third trilogy till 2025.

Fourth Quarter 2022 Queries and Submissions

So here’s how that’s been going during fourth quarter 2022.

Reprint

Coming right out of the blue, Mythic Magazine wants to do a second Best of Mythic and chose A True Believer in Skepticism!!! Yay!!!!

In Progress

As of fourth quarter 2022, the following are still in the running for publishing:

This list is the name of the story and then the name of the potential publisher.

• I Used to Be Happy – Gemini Magazine
† Justice – Adbusters
• Mettle – RAB
† Soul Rentals ‘R’ Us – A Thousand One Stories
• Who Do We Blame for This? – Sonder Review

But the truth is, I suspect all of those are ghostings at this point. I don’t honestly have the energy to submit right now.

All Other Statuses

So be sure to see the Stats section for some details on any query statuses for fourth quarter 2022 which were not in progress.

Stats

So in 2018, my querying stats were:

68 submissions of 19 stories

† Acceptances: 4, 5.88%
• In Progress-Under Consideration: 3, 4.41% (so these don’t seem to have panned out)
† In Progress: 10, 14.71%
• Rejected-Personal: 14, 20.59%
† Rejected-Form: 24, 35.29%
• Ghosted: 13 (so these were submissions where I never found out what happened), 19.12%

So in 2019 my querying stats were:

23 submissions of 11 stories (so 6 submissions carry over from 2018)
† Acceptances: 4, 17.39%
• In Progress: 11 (so this includes 2 holdovers from 2018), 47.83%
† Rejected-Personal: 4, 17.39%
• Rejected-Form: 3, 13.04%
† Ghosted: 1 (so these are submissions where I never found out what happened), 4.35%

2020 Stats

So, in 2020 my querying stats were:

37 submissions of 12 stories (so 9 submissions carried over from 2019)

• Acceptances: 3, 8.11%
† In Progress: 7, 18.92%
• Rejected-Personal: 12, 32.43%
† Rejected-Form: 4, 10.81%
• Ghosted: 11 (so these are submissions where I never found out what happened), 29.73%

2021 Stats

So, in 2021 my querying stats were: 5 submissions of 5 stories (so 5 submissions carried over from 2020); 100% Ghosted.

2022 Stats

So, in 2022 my querying stats were:

6 submissions of 6 stories (so 5 submissions carry over from 2020 and 2021), plus 1 reprint!

† Acceptances (reprint; still waiting on it): 1,14.29%
• Rejected-Form: 1, 14.29%
† Ghosted: 5, 71.42%

It can be pretty discouraging and hard to go on when virtually nothing new comes up which is positive.

Fourth Quarter 2022—Productivity Killers

So it’s work, what else? I am working on a ton of things and then have to switch to fiction writing. And that isn’t always easy, and there’s no end in sight.

My focus right now, also, is to continue to redesign and overhaul this blog and website. So, that’s the priority, and creation will wait for it, and editing.

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Character Review — Trixie LaRue

Consider Trixie LaRue, One of My Original Characters

But just who is Trixie LaRue?

I’ve had a few “voice of reason”-style characters. Dr. Devon Grace of The Real Hub of the Universe comes to mind. Trixie is another such character. But she’s also amusing, a little like Greg Shapiro in The Obolonk Murders.

The first time I show her in the book, she’s getting drunk with Marnie and Jazminder. And she’s telling them about how a goat chewing on her sleeve ruined a potentially romantic moment with one of the goatherds.

Goats on a spaceship? Why not?

Where Did Trixie LaRue Come From?

Trixie is a great supporting character in The Enigman Cave. I needed a foil for Marnie. But I also wanted someone who would have a kind of larger than life persona.

Her accent comes from a few places. I learned about London, Kentucky when I used to have a job auditing law firms across the country. But I never had occasion to go there.

But her voice? Her accent? Those come from the late mother of my best friend in high school. She had that fabulous accent and was one of the kindest people I have ever known.

The Past is Prologue — Backstory for Trixie LaRue

The character herself explains her backstory. Before the story begins, she and Marnie attend Deep Space training together. They find they’re simpatico and clearly enjoy each other’s company. The misfits of their class, no one else seems to be a part of their orbit. Although when I wrote the prequel, I added Rosa Perrault, mainly because there would be someone like her in the mix.

But make no mistake about it—they like Rosa, but they are not as close to her, as they are to each other.

But that’s okay. Because they’re not in anyone else’s orbit, either.

Description

I like Amie Sikes of Junk Gypsies for Trixie. She’s about the right look and age, with a glint of mischief in her eye. But I do see Trixie as being more of a redhead.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation

Beyond being the voice of reason, Trixie is also a necessary character when Marnie decides on how to try to prove Enigman intelligence—in a JAG court. Marnie is the client in favor. But someone has to be the opponent. And so that’s our gal.

In the below scene in Chapter 6 — The Pretty People, Trixie tells Jazminder Parikh about how she and Captain Marnie Shapiro end up on the Valentina Tereshkova together.

It’s possible that I’ll cut some of this scene. For one thing, it’s long. But for another, It seems like a little much. The brass doesn’t like Marnie. That much is obvious. But does it need quite so much detail?

Also, I cover a lot of this in the prequel, and I think I cover it better there. So,…

Quotes

“… in our last semester we were asked to pick three people we wanted to work with. We were also asked which department we wanted to go in if we were in one of the last thirty-two slots. It was kinda obvious nobody but me wanted to work with Marne. Then when we graduated, they started callin’ us by name and by grade. They started with the bottom. I mean, even if you was terrible, you were still pretty gol-darned smart. It was no shame to be at the bottom. So they announced the first forty of the sixty-two people in the class, and they announced your assignment, too.

“The next thirty-eight up were mostly captains and not a lotta first officers, like me. You had to stand while you were waitin’, and it was getting tiresome, I’ll tell ya. But we hadn’t been called yet. Then they said there was someone who was good enough to be a captain but was being commissioned as a first officer on account of personality issues.”

“Personality issues?”

“They wanted people to get along, see? I mean, you’re out here for a decade, it would kinda stink if you hated each other.”

“Right. Go on.”

The Speech

“They called another first officer and then we were into the captains. And Marne and I are still standing there. It’s the last thirty-one people and there are thirty captain slots and one first officer slot left. They get down to fourteen of us and I get called. I am the last of the first officers and I’m assigned here, to the Val. I know Marnie hasn’t been assigned anywhere, and this is the first I’ve heard of anyone going on the Val. There’s a chance but I have no idea.

“They keep announcing people and then they spring it on ‘em that the top of the class has to make a speech. They are in the top ten by this time and everybody’s looking around at each other on account this is the first anybody’s heard of that. And then it’s finally down to two people – Marnie and Bill Levinson. He gets announced as captain of the Jonas Salk and I realize, maybe even before Marne does, that she’s at the top of our class and she’s got me here on the Val.

Relationships

I have no relationship for her beyond friendship. And friendship counts, of course! Much like the top three big characters in TOS Star Trek, Trixie is a major player. She and Jazzie (Jazminder) are just about as vital as Marnie. Not just to the ship, but to the story itself.

But she is far from a latter-day Vulcan.

Trixie is kind and loyal. She’s the kind of friend anyone would want to have. She has a sister and that’s about it. I otherwise don’t have a lot about her.

Her relationship attempts, though, are in the book. Charlie Hill is a goatherd and she’s got the hots for him. But later, she gets the hots for Hunter Garcia. Hunter runs JAG. So, where does she end up? Possibly with neither of them.

Conflict and Turning Point

For our gal Trixie, the turning point is essentially the turning point of the book. That is, when it becomes obvious that things are going to hell in a handcart at home. So she decides to make a stand. This is along with almost everyone else.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

Trixie is one of the only people in The Enigman Cave who I didn’t name after someone I attended high school with or knew personally in some other way (neither are Marnie or Jazzie).

But she truly is from somewhere. She’s the name of an ex-girlfriend of a former coworker. I have no idea if the real Trixie LaRue was from Kentucky. But I suspect she wasn’t.

And yeah, I know how gol-darned (Trixie does tend to rub off on you after a while) obscure and out-there that sounds. It was just a name from years ago. I filed it away for later.

Future Plans

Will I ever write a real full-length sequel to The Enigman Cave? After all, I did write a short story sequel…

Trixie LaRue: Takeaways

Funny, smart, supportive, and ultimately brave and kind, Trixie is about the best first officer any spaceship captain could ever want.

But she’s still gonna shoot that sumbitch goat.

Trixie LaRue is not to be trifled with.


Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon

Want More of Trixie LaRue and the Rest of The Enigman Cave?

If The Enigman Cave resonates with you, then check out my other articles about how our society handles first contact with a species that may be as primitive as Australopithecus.

Character Reviews: The Enigman Cave

Marnie Shapiro
A Look at Trixie LaRue
Jazminder Parikh, MD
Lex Feldman
Benjamin Chase
The Enigman Cave Universe
Bet on Marnie (the prequel)
Surprises (the short story sequel)
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Character Review — Marnie Shapiro

Consider Marnie Shapiro, One of My Original Characters

Who is Marnie Shapiro?

The main character of The Enigman Cave went through a lot of changes. But that makes sense, as the story itself has been through a number of alterations as well.

I originally conceived of Marnie as being a person who was kind of in the midst of a personal crisis. She was to be getting a divorce while on a deep space mission.

And that’s an idea I may very well work with at some later date. I think it’s kinda cool. And there is no question in mind that this would be a story worth exploring. Yet I didn’t write it. Hell, I didn’t even write it for the prequel. I did kind of mean to, though.

But then things got … a little different.

Where Did Marnie Shapiro Come From?

First of all, I was at first going to name this character Marnie Chase. But then she just plain didn’t “feel” like a Chase. I don’t know. But no matter how I felt, it didn’t seem suitable for the character. And so her name was changed.

This was to be my NaNoWriMo novel for 2015, and I had to change the name of the main character? As it happened, I ended up changing Josie James’s name as well. Sometimes, you don’t get it right the first time.

And … the character won’t come alive until you do. It’s as if they’re standing there, hands on hips, shaking their head—sheesh, she still can’t get this stuff right? 

So, she’s Marnie Chase Shapiro, I suppose.

The Past is Prologue — Backstory for Marnie Shapiro

Marne’s past is told in a few little dribs and drabs in the manuscript. Her marriage to Dr. Ben Chase (he’s a botanist)? As I wrote in the book (chapter 4—and it’s so much exposition that I will likely have to edit out a good chunk of it, anyway):

They had met years before, as young adults, and had fallen in love, kind of, even though they were both emotionally unavailable. It was a marriage of intellectual equals who sparred as much as they had sex and generally admired each other’s brains more than other body parts. Even Marnie’s own brother had said they seemed to be the kind of couple that coexisted, parallel lines never truly intersecting.

But there’s more. As essentially a power couple, the brass want both of them for deep space missions. If not for Ben, Marnie would not have been brought in. I make this clearer in the prequel.

The brass wanted the people going into space to be young, attractive, athletic, and personable. Marnie’s far from young or athletic. And she doesn’t suffer fools gladly. So, in a lot of ways she owes Ben her position. But he’s still a jackass to her.

Deep Space Training School

Marnie attends Deep Space Training School, along with a number of captain and first officer candidates. This includes the woman who becomes her first officer, Trixie LaRue.

There was one person in their class getting straight A’s—and since they only saw posted grades with no names, there’s no way to know who it was. But at graduation, the powers that be reveal everyone in grade order, starting with the bottom of the class.

Trixie herself ends up in the top ten, but she’s commissioned as a first officer, due to personality issues. The last two people called are Bill Levinson and Marnie.

And, the valedictorian position goes to Marnie, who must deliver a speech with no preparation whatsoever. It’s a bit of passive-aggressive nastiness from the powers that be.

It’s evident that, deep down, they just plain don’t like her.

This is a taste, for Marnie, of things to come.

Description

Marnie is in her fifties, a bottle blonde who’s holding onto a few extra pounds. Her poor diet and exercise regimen, plus stress, have caused her meniscus (that’s cartilage in the knee) to fail. She is, as people used to say, A Woman of a Certain Age.

I go back and forth for an actress approximation of her. Maybe Elisabeth Shue?

But the most important thing about her is that anyone ‘portraying’ Marnie should really be in her fifties. And she should really look and talk and act that way. So, I can’t see her in the guise of a somewhat younger actress with aging makeup. Nope. I want the real thing.

After all, that’s exactly what Marnie would want, too.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation

Marnie’s main motivator is a desire for justice. For someone unfairly overlooked and underestimated, the concept of wanting to protect the weak and keep the crew from harm feels like a natural internal motivator.

Also—at the time—I had a meniscus tear, and I hobbled around a lot like Marnie does. So, we have that in common.

In fact, a lot of my main characters have gotten whatever ailment I had at the moment. Marnie, if she were real, would be happy that she’s not Josie.

Quotes

While trying to prove Enigman intelligence, the hearing is also an occasion to get a covert message back to Earth. Here’s part of it.

“Carter is threatening all of us. We don’t even know if what he’s saying is true. But if those detention camps exist, then I implore you, I beg of you, I hope you will do the right thing. Find those places. Please. We are years away from Earth, even at top speed. Please, please find those places, and tear down their gates, and free those people. I know you can do it. Please don’t be afraid of Carter. These things happen because good people like you are afraid to stand up for what’s right. But I know you; you’re good and brave people. You won’t let him push anyone around.”

Relationships

Like many characters, one way to get insight into Marnie is to inspect her relationships with the other characters.

Marnie and Ben

Marnie has to deal with her ex-husband, Ben, because he runs the Botany Department, and he reports directly to her. Ben annoys Marnie incessantly, in particular insisting on referring to her by her full name, Mariana.

But that’s all a part of how such a narcissist would hold her at arm’s length. Still, they have to deal with each other. But for the most part, they stay out of each others’ hair.

Much more problematic for Marnie is that Ben is engaged to Nurse Kristen Watson, a woman he cheated on Marnie with, while they were all in the middle of the mission. Kristen is young, pretty, and bubbly. Little Miss Sunshine is everything Marnie is not.

Marnie and Trixie and Jazminder

One fantastic (if I do say so myself) part of The Enigman Cave is the female friendships. The book passes the Bechdel test, and blows it away, in the first chapter alone.

The three women at the heart of the story and their ship, the Valentina Tereshkova, are almost Kirk, Bones, and Spock. Except the doctor (Jazminder) is a bit more like Spock. But no matter.

Trixie and Marnie meet in Deep Space Training school, where they give Marnie’s roommate, Missy Mahoney, a hard time. This includes juvenile pranks like short sheeting her bed.

When it comes time to tell the powers that be who they want to work with, they both pick only one person—each other.

Jazzie comes in later. Of course, any spaceship will have to have a doctor. From a posh suburb of Hyderabad, educated in England, Jazzie has an accent plummier than a Christmas pudding. She’s also a lesbian, and she drinks.

But in the first chapter, one of the first scenes is of the three of them getting drunk in Marnie’s quarters. They laugh, they joke, they get serious, and they behave exactly like three old friends should act.

Marnie and Lex

As the assistant veterinarian on board, Lex isn’t exactly at the top of the heap. But this is helpful, because he doesn’t report directly to Marnie. Hence, their relationship can go ahead.

Unlike with Ben, Marnie can open up to Lex, and he will listen to her without judgment. Their fellowship is the kind of friendship/love affair that has every indication of going the distance.

He’s also 25 years younger than her—and good-looking.

Is he wish-fulfillment for me? Not really; I’m happily married and all. But I do love the idea of the semi-ugly duckling (as it were) getting the swan. Fortunately for Marnie, Lex is not just a pretty face. He is truly devoted to her, and he’s kind.

Conflict and Turning Point

Without giving away too many spoilers, Marnie’s conflict is the story’s—when the crew finds the first sapient life outside of Earth, it’s a cause for celebration. But that quickly devolves into worry, as the government at home collapses into a dictatorship.

The first of two shining moments for Marnie is the scene above, where she devises a way to do an end-run around the nasty commands they’re getting from the new dictator, Monroe Carter, who fancies himself a latter day Cortez.

And the other shining moment is first contact. An exciting plot point for pretty much any space opera, Marnie’s solution for how to talk to the life form they’ve found is to do something extremely female.

And it is an utterly maternal thing to do, even though Marnie doesn’t have children. It’s not treaties or speeches, and it’s certainly not a show of arms and force. Rather, it is completely, 100% peaceful in intent and act.

Marnie’s solution is to sit down and tell them a story.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

Like other characters named Shapiro, Marnie is a callback across universes. Her middle name, Robin, even ties in with Robin McKenna, a pivotal character in the Time Addicts series. Marnie is also a Bostonian, although I don’t outline that well enough.

Future Plans for Marnie Shapiro

The end of the story allows for the possibility of a sequel, if there’s interest.

I have also written a prequel, which covered Marnie and Trixie at Deep Space Training School. It was a part of #30Day50k in 2025.
Click to buy Untrustworthy on Amazon

Marnie Shapiro: Takeaways

For a person who many would overlook, Marnie is the heroine of her own story. Her imperfections and quirks add interest.

And she is the kind of character who can believably make a speech like the quote above.

Bet on Marnie.

Never bet against Marnie Shapiro — a character who exceeds expectations.


Want More of Marnie Shapiro and the Rest of The Enigman Cave?

If The Enigman Cave resonates with you, then please check out my other blog posts about how our society handles first contact with a species that may be as primitive as Australopithecus.

Character Reviews: The Enigman Cave

Trixie LaRue
Jazminder Parikh, MD
Lex Feldman
Benjamin Chase

The Enigman Cave Universe
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Self-Review – The Enigman Cave

Review – The Enigman Cave

So, the first thing you should know is that the Enigman Cave has some of its roots in fan fiction. But I have changed a ton of it and I am more than confident that there’s no way any copyright could be asserted in this work that is not my own.

Background

So a few years ago, I had created a wholly original species called Witannen. They had flowers growing out of their scalps instead of hair, and the pure Witannen would sport little vestigial wings which couldn’t be used for much of anything. But the flowers, the chavecoi, would have a symbiotic relationship with a Witannen and could photosynthesize and prevent starvation.

At times, the flowers would even make almost a statement, where the character might be saying one thing, but the chavecoi were turning some odd color or pointing is some direction in direct contradiction. Hence, Witannen could not play poker successfully.

The Enigmans, however, were something else. Also, I wanted them to be a lot more primitive. However it wasn’t until I decided to make them similar to Australopithecines that they sprang into sharp focus.

Plot

Marnie and her crew on the Valentina Tereshkova have one job – to find multi-cellular life. They have already found tons of primordial soup and unicellular life. The galaxy seems to abound with it. Hence the opening line: Life is common.

I think it’s one of the better opening lines I’ve ever written.

Back at home, there is a world government. But they seem to have forgotten the Val and the other wedge ships (another 20+ are also looking for life but have gone in other directions). And no wonder, as the government is collapsing. When the Val finds the Enigmans, the new despotic government sees an opportunity to play at being Cortez 2.0.

Marnie feels her only hope of protecting the people of the Enigman Cave is to prove their intelligence. But how?

In the JAG Court.

Characters

The main character is Captain Marnie Shapiro, of the USS Valentina Tereshkova. Also, the other main characters include her first officer, Patricia LaRue, who she calls Trixie, which makes her sound like a dance hall girl. Trixie’s from London, Kentucky, with an accent right out of the holler.

The chief medical officer is Dr. Jazminder Parikh. At the start of the book, she and her girlfriend, Ginny Carey, have recently ended their relationship. Then there’s Marnie’s ex-husband, Ben Chase. Ben is the chief botanist aboard and he and his fiancée, nurse Kristen Watson, are about to be married. He also cheated on Marnie with Kristen.

So things are uncomfortable. But when Marnie meets the nighttime veterinarian, Lex Feldman, sparks fly. Nighttime vet, you ask? There are two vets, because the ship’s food stores are alive – goats, chickens, cod, and salmon. There’s even farming.

Day shift vet Tom Ciorciari is on the Bridge, because the Scientific Officer (I tried so hard to keep it from just copying Star Trek), Art Yarrow, is on paternity leave. Yes, it’s a ship with children, and even a mid-level officer in charge of them.

Plus the lawyers of the JAG Court are also important characters. The head of that unit is Hunter Garcia. The others are Terry Lynn Shull, Steve Roberts, Mike Medeiros, and Nick Minecci.

Also, lots of characters in The Enigman Cave are named after people I know.

The scenes take place either on board the Val or on the surface of Kepler 423-B, which they name Enigma.

Fun Fact About The Enigman Cave

I originally wanted to call this piece The Enigma Cave. And then I learned that title was already taken.

Ewps.

Memorable Quotes from The Enigman Cave

“Yes, Dr. Chase? The captain needs you here on the Bridge.”

And then in the background, there was Ben’s voice, whining and complaining, “I’m in the middle of an experiment.”

“Benjamin Chase!” Marnie yelled, her sudden increase in volume scaring everyone and breaking Tom out of his trance. “Get your ass over here. Now! Or I get somebody else to run Botany.”

“All right. But I blame you if this experiment goes to hell.” He cut the connection.

Tom looked back over his shoulder at Marnie. “What did we just find?”

“Wait for confirmation. Just, just wait for it. Astrid, send Ben the picture you took of the green stuff. Send it to his tablet.”

“Will do.”

A few minutes later, Chase stomped in. “You know I’m not on the Bridge crew,” he began, glaring at his ex-wife. “And who the hell sent me a picture of a bunch of chlorophyll?”

“Chlorophyll?” asked Ray. The others just stared.

“Yes! Goddamned chlorophyll. I don’t have the time for these shenanigans,” Chase huffed.

“Ben,” Marnie looked him in the eye, “are you absolutely certain that stuff is chlorophyll?”

“I know chlorophyll when I see it. Every botanist does.”

“And the chemical formula, Tom, what do you have on your screen?”

“C55H72O5N4Mg.”

More Quotes from The Enigman Cave (same scene)

“That, C-whatever, that stuff,” Marnie said. “Is that chlorophyll?”

“Yes.” Chase was even more peeved. “Everybody past Biochemistry 101 knows that.”

“They never found it off Earth though, eh?” Marnie asked, playing her trump card.

“What?”

“Here,” Astrid punched up another picture. “This is the atmosphere of the world we’re orbiting.”

Ben leaned over and then looked through the scope at the Scientific station. “Well, I’ll be damned.” He, too, was slack-jawed. “We, we found it.”

“Are you sure?” asked Marnie.

“Yes,” Chase was threatening to become as shell-shocked as Marnie and Tom had been. “Algae can have chlorophyll. They’re technically unicellular. But they, they live communally. I, I would say they, they count as, as multi-cellular.”

“Remember where you were, remember what you were thinking and, and how you felt,” Marnie said to them. “Because this is goddamned history.”

Rating

So if I had to rate The Enigman Cave, I would put it at about T for Teen. Because there are three sex scenes (one alien). Plus there is one incidence of violence but it’s only on screen for a moment. The inciting incident is a pair of deaths but the story starts after that, so I don’t show them.

Also, as I have continued to rewrite and edit the piece, I have ended up realizing that the sex scenes were a bit too explicit. So, they are getting more toned down these days.

Upshot

So, at the time, it was the best book I had ever written. But now? I can’t say. I can still see some parts where it could stand to be trimmed. So now I strongly suspect it will need an overhaul before I can even think about querying it. Or maybe self-publishing it.

As for Marnie and her pals, there will be a prequel.

The Enigman universe has room for some sequels. What do you think?


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