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Author: Janet Gershen-Siegel

I'm not much bigger than a breadbox.

Self-Review – Darkness into Light

Review – Darkness into Light

One of the best parts of Darkness into Light is that it’s just a catch phrase. Hence, just like ‘good morning’ or ‘hello’, the characters say ‘darkness into light’ all the time. They repeat it continuously within the story.

So I wanted ‘darkness into light’ to be almost like ‘Hello, Comrade’. I needed for it to take on a sinister tone.

And boy, did it ever.

Background for Darkness into Light

With a 1984/Brave New World vibe, the catchphrase turned evil very, very quickly.

The idea behind it was that in a future which might not be so far-fetched, the price of equality is a ton of sameness. And that sameness means going along with the majority in every possible way.

So for this society, there can be no deviations, no exceptions, and no delays.

Because you’ve got to be equal. And not necessarily voluntarily.

Or else.

Plot

Minor government functionary Susan has but one job – to make sure that all of the babies born in the Smith Hospital are the exact same color.

But then she finds a pair faces which don’t fit the approved color scheme. And that’s got to change, fast.

Or else.

Characters

The characters are Susan, a minor government functionary. So there is also the young couple she needs to convert from the dark into the light. Whether they want that to happen, or not.

Memorable Quotes

There were dozens of people in Smith County in Smith State who were all expecting children, and the projection on the wall told the tale. She glanced at the faces briefly. Nearly all of them were already the correct, uniform shade and shape, dimensions perfectly aligned and proportioned as per the law.

Rating

The story has a K rating. But it is a bit disturbing. So, I do caution readers.

Takeaways – Darkness Into Light, Indeed

I really love how quickly and easily I was able to turn Susan into something utterly sinister. Beneath a cheerful, allegedly helpful and caring façade, there is a nasty drive to make every single person conform. Whether they like it or not.

I am so glad that this story found an audience. You can find it on the Corner Bar Magazine website. And this site also published Killing Us Softly.

Darkness into Light. If I’ve done my job right, this phrase should make you shudder. #amediting


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Genre Treatments

A Look at Genre Treatments in Writing

Let’s start with the most basic of questions. What are genre treatments?

Genre Treatments

When it comes to genre treatments, do you treat horror, science fiction, and romance all the same way? Or do you just stick to one genre and call it a day?

What are Literary Genres?

It might help to understand just what literary genres are. Let’s start with the short one.

Nonfiction

Narrative nonfiction tells a story. Biographies and autobiographies are often more or less subsets of this. While it’s possible to relate a biography in a non-narrative form, that’s pretty rare. Essays are a form of short nonfiction. And speech is pretty self-explanatory. Is it the truth? Then it’s not fiction. Kinda obvious there.

Fiction

But there’s a lot more here. Poetry is usually rhythmic (although it doesn’t have to be) and has evocative imagery. Drama is serious stuff, and it can be a part of theatrical performances.

Humor or Comedy?

Humor is of course the funny stuff. Don’t confuse it with comedy (although we use the terms interchangeably in common parlance). Comedy is just when the protagonist lives at the end of the piece. Contrast that with tragedy, which is where the main character dies by the end. But comedy, traditionally, does not mean something is funny.

By this definition, A Clockwork Orange is a comedy.

Fantasy or Myth?

Science fiction and fantasy are often close. While fantasy is generally more otherworldly, science fiction usually dovetails with possible science, no matter how far-fetched. Fairy tales, in contrast, are generally drawn from folklore. The more general term, folklore, goes beyond stories to songs and proverbs from long ago. Legends, on the other hand, often have a basis in fact. This can be the subject (a national hero, like El Cid) or the plot. A fable is often short, but it always contains a moral lesson. A short story is generally too brief for a subplot.

Realistic fiction is also fairly self-explanatory. It’s fiction which could be real. Historical fiction adds a historical dimension although it’s often also meant to be realistic.

Horror evokes fright and visceral reactions. Tall tales are overly exaggerated and are virtually the opposite of realistic fiction. Mythology is a traditional narrative with a religious or faith-based component. Mystery involves the solving of a crime or uncovering secrets. Finally, fiction in verse is much longer poetry which contains subplots and major themes.

What are generally not considered to be full-blown genres? Young adult, adventure, romance, etc. Hence the idea, for the most part, has more to do with length and execution than subject matter.

How Do You Treat These Genres?

First of all, consider pacing. Horror often slows down, and then speeds up. Mystery might take a while to build to a satisfactory conclusion. Furthermore, mysteries contain red herrings. Myths might contain repetition. Some of that comes from oral tradition. Humor is all about timing. Drama can often be slow and building. Traditional poetry may have a sing-song rhythm. Adventure might have a fairly straightforward line from beginning to end, continually amping up the stakes.

Your Personal Genre Treatments, and Mine

What is your particular spin? Do you use short, choppy sentence to speed up the action? Do you also choose shorter words?

One subtle trick I have learned is to use passive voice when a character is a victim. The way I see it is, if things are happening to a character without their consent, then the subject of any sentences describing that should be deemphasized.

So for me, my way to handle genres varies due to emphasis. While I mostly write in the science fiction genre, it encompasses a ton of differing emphases. A story might be funnier, or sadder. The Real Hub of the Universe is essentially historical fiction done up with science fiction clothes, with mystery thrown in. Whereas the initial Obolonk trilogy is a police procedural/mystery, again wearing the costume of science fiction.

Takeaways

Consider your genre as you write.

Genre treatments are kind of like rules. Follow them, at least to start. But don’t be afraid to break them on occasion.


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… And Facebook for All – Your Profile Page, Part II

… And Facebook for All – Your Profile Page, Part II

It’s something Facebook members have seen hundreds, if not thousands, of times. It’s your profile page.

Let’s talk some more about your profile. Here’s mine.

In addition to the basic tabs at the top, it also contains:

  • A space for your profile picture
  • Information on any mutual friends you might share with anyone peeking at your profile
  • A small subgroup of your friends
  • Your likes
  • also, your photos
  • Your links
  • A share button, and,
  • Some ads

NOTE: Facebook continually A/B tests, and so buttons and features move, change, are resized, added, or can disappear altogether. Your neighbor can sometimes see a rather different version of Facebook versus yours. And this is normal. But these elements have been there for quite a while. It’s a safe bet that many of these account settings will stay on your FB profile page.

Let’s look at these in order.

A Space for Your Profile Picture

No one is stopping you from putting up a picture that is not, actually, of you. As a result, I’ve seen dogs on Facebook, scenery, people’s children, and cartoon characters and more. Hence it’s a place to be somewhat expressive.

However, recognize that, if you’re using Facebook at all for your business (or if you’re simply looking for work), you’ll need to tone this down.

If you want to go fairly conservative (which I personally think is best but opinions differ), go with a headshot or a head and shoulders shot that’s fairly recent. And, do make sure you’re smiling.

Mutual Friends

If someone surfs in and finds your Profile Page, they’ll probably be drawn to whether you’re really the person they’re looking for, and whether you have any acquaintances in common.

If you’ve got a somewhat common name (e. g. Gregory Cole), then it’s really going to help out people if they see anyone who you know is in common with whoever they know.

One way I’ve used this information has been in locating High School friends, as we tend to have the same mutual friends.

If I see that Jane Smith is also friends with John Jones and Dave Brown (names are made up, of course), then I realize, aha! Chances are good that Jane and I attended High School together. Or, at least, she’s from my area.

However, sometimes it just means that Jane is a local (if John and Dave stayed in the area after graduation). Or it might mean she’s a younger or older sibling of my classmates. Hence it’s an imperfect system.

A Small Subgroup of Friends

So this is six friends (fewer, if you have fewer than six friends, of course). And it used to be you had control over this, but apparently not anymore.

As Facebook gets larger and larger, aggregations like these start to go the way of the dodo. Why? Because Facebook is really just a big, honkin’ database. With 2 billion daily active users, all these displays, with their sortings and re-sortings, are going to get memory intensive rather quickly.

It will never, truly, be a bare bones platform a la Twitter. But you can expect to see some aggregative niceties to go away over time, or to be aggregated even further.

After all, how many times have you seen only the so-called “most relevant” comments instead of all of them when you click on a post. That, my friend, is saving Facebook some valuable memory.

Your Likes

Whenever you click Like on a group or page, it can show up here. A few show up at a time, and they rotate. To take something out of rotation, un-Like it. Much older and inactive pages and groups show up less, as Facebook follows social signals in this area, too.

E. g. pages and groups that appear inactive or even downright abandoned will lose precious visibility time and space to groups and pages that are up to date and lively.

Photos on Your Profile Page

So here is where your profile picture shows up in all its glory, and bigger than on your Home Page. Therefore, make sure it looks good here as well as on your Home Page. What I said above bears repeating.

If you’re using Facebook for business (or if you’re looking for work), make sure your profile image is a flattering photo clearing showing your face. It need not be full-length (and, if it is, it’ll be smaller on the Home Page, but here it’s all visible) and, for God’s sake, smile!

Plus, photographs also show up on your wall if you upload them and agree to publish them to your wall.

Your Links can go on Your Profile Page

So put a link in your status, or post it to your wall, and it will convert to something clickable. And if it comes from Youtube, it’ll even embed the video. And like most things on Facebook, any link can get comments or “Likes”.

A Share Button

Actually, there are several of these. Pretty much everything on Facebook can be shared in one manner or another, and even off Facebook.

Bottom line: your Profile Page is your face to the world. It is clickable, shareable and somewhat searchable. Don’t want people to know something about you? Don’t put it on your Profile Page.


Want More About Facebook?

If this article resonates with you, then check out my other articles about the largest social media platform on the planet.

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Character Review — Trixie LaRue

Consider Trixie LaRue, One of My Original Characters

But just who is Trixie LaRue?

I’ve had a few “voice of reason”-style characters. Dr. Devon Grace of The Real Hub of the Universe comes to mind. Trixie is another such character. But she’s also amusing, a little like Greg Shapiro in The Obolonk Murders.

The first time I show her in the book, she’s getting drunk with Marnie and Jazminder. And she’s telling them about how a goat chewing on her sleeve ruined a potentially romantic moment with one of the goatherds.

Goats on a spaceship? Why not?

Where Did Trixie LaRue Come From?

Trixie is a great supporting character in The Enigman Cave. I needed a foil for Marnie. But I also wanted someone who would have a kind of larger than life persona.

Her accent comes from a few places. I learned about London, Kentucky when I used to have a job auditing law firms across the country. But I never had occasion to go there. But her voice? Her accent? Those come from the late mother of my best friend in high school. She had that fabulous accent and was one of the kindest people I have ever known.

The Past is Prologue — Backstory for Trixie LaRue

The character herself explains her backstory. Before the story begins, she and Marnie attend Deep Space training together. They find they’re simpatico and clearly enjoy each other’s company. The misfits of their class, no one else seems to be a part of their orbit.

But that’s okay. Because they’re not in anyone else’s orbit, either.

Description

I like Amie Sikes of Junk Gypsies for Trixie. She’s about the right look and age, with a glint of mischief in her eye. But I do see Trixie as being more of a redhead.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation

Beyond being the voice of reason, Trixie is also a necessary character when Marnie decides on how to try to prove Enigman intelligence—in a JAG court. Marnie is the client in favor. But someone has to be the opponent. And so that’s our gal.

In the below scene in Chapter 6 — The Pretty People, Trixie tells Jazminder Parikh about how she and Captain Marnie Shapiro end up on the Valentina Tereshkova together.

It’s possible that I’ll cut some of this scene. For one thing, it’s long. But for another, It seems like a little much. The brass doesn’t like Marnie. That much is obvious. But does it need quite so much detail?

Quotes

“… in our last semester we were asked to pick three people we wanted to work with. We were also asked which department we wanted to go in if we were in one of the last thirty-two slots. It was kinda obvious nobody but me wanted to work with Marne. Then when we graduated, they started callin’ us by name and by grade. They started with the bottom. I mean, even if you was terrible, you were still pretty gol-darned smart. It was no shame to be at the bottom. So they announced the first forty of the sixty-two people in the class, and they announced your assignment, too.

“The next thirty-eight up were mostly captains and not a lotta first officers, like me. You had to stand while you were waitin’, and it was getting tiresome, I’ll tell ya. But we hadn’t been called yet. Then they said there was someone who was good enough to be a captain but was being commissioned as a first officer on account of personality issues.”

“Personality issues?”

“They wanted people to get along, see? I mean, you’re out here for a decade, it would kinda stink if you hated each other.”

“Right. Go on.”

The Speech

“They called another first officer and then we were into the captains. And Marne and I are still standing there. It’s the last thirty-one people and there are thirty captain slots and one first officer slot left. They get down to fourteen of us and I get called. I am the last of the first officers and I’m assigned here, to the Val. I know Marnie hasn’t been assigned anywhere, and this is the first I’ve heard of anyone going on the Val. There’s a chance but I have no idea.

“They keep announcing people and then they spring it on ‘em that the top of the class has to make a speech. They are in the top ten by this time and everybody’s looking around at each other on account this is the first anybody’s heard of that. And then it’s finally down to two people – Marnie and Bill Levinson. He gets announced as captain of the Jonas Salk and I realize, maybe even before Marne does, that she’s at the top of our class and she’s got me here on the Val.

Relationships

I have no relationship for her beyond friendship. And friendship counts, of course! Much like the top three big characters in TOS Star Trek, Trixie is a major player. She and Jazzie (Jazminder) are just about as vital as Marnie. Not just to the ship, but to the story itself. But she is far from a latter-day Vulcan.

Trixie is kind and loyal. She’s the kind of friend anyone would want to have. She has a sister and that’s about it. I otherwise don’t have a lot about her.

Her relationship attempts, though, are in the book. Charlie Hill is a goatherd and she’s got the hots for him. But later, she gets the hots for Hunter Garcia. Hunter runs JAG. So, where does she end up? Possibly with neither of them.

Conflict and Turning Point

For our gal Trixie, the turning point is essentially the turning point of the book. That is, when it becomes obvious that things are going to hell in a handcart at home. So she decides to make a stand. This is along with almost everyone else.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

Trixie is one of the only people in The Enigman Cave who I didn’t name after someone I attended high school with or knew personally in some other way (neither are Marnie or Jazzie). But she is from somewhere. She’s the name of an ex-girlfriend of a former coworker. I have no idea if the real Trixie LaRue was from Kentucky. But I suspect she wasn’t.

And yeah, I know how gol-darned (Trixie does rub off on you after a while) obscure and out-there that sounds. It was just a name from years ago. I filed it away for later.

Future Plans

Will I ever write a real full-length sequel to The Enigman Cave? After all, I did write a short story sequel

Trixie LaRue: Takeaways

Funny, smart, supportive, and ultimately brave and kind, Trixie is about the best first officer any spaceship captain could ever want.

But she’s still gonna shoot that sumbitch goat.

Trixie LaRue is not to be trifled with.


Want More of Trixie LaRue and the Rest of The Enigman Cave?

If The Enigman Cave resonates with you, then check out my other articles about how our society handles first contact with a species that may be as primitive as Australopithecus.

Character Reviews: The Enigman Cave

The Enigman Cave Universe

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Writing Progress Report – Second Quarter 2022

Progress Report – Second Quarter 2022

How was second quarter 2022 for writing? So I spent second quarter 2022 overhauling this website. This included creating basic landing pages for each of the universes I am writing in. I’m happy with how they’re turning out. But of course that’s the sort of thing that can easily become a perpetual work in progress.

The idea behind these pages is to create a central hub for universes like for the Obolonks or Enigmans. And then anything else I write about them will feed off those pages and feed back into them.

And I was looking for a good writing group that spoke to me. I also submitted to one place and edited Mettle, Gentrification, The Obolonk Murders, and The Polymer Beat.

Second Quarter 2022 Posted Works

First of all, I worked a little on new short stories. I also spent a lot of my time working to get inspired. So, I would think about plot bunnies.

Then on Wattpad I posted on the WattNaNo profile and the Star Trek Fans profile, and nowhere else.

Milestones

Also, I have written over two and a half million words (fan fiction and wholly original fiction combined). So right now my stats on Wattpad for wholly original works are as follows:

  • Dinosaurs – 40+ reads, 9+ comments
  • How to NaNoWriMo – 25,199+ reads, 320+ comments
  • My Favorite Things (like kibble) – 983 reads, 133 comments
  • Revved Up – 59,415+ reads, 530+ comments
  • Side By Side – 17 reads, 1 comments
  • Social Media Guide for Wattpad – 15,384+ reads, 591+ comments
  • The Canadian Caper – 502 reads, 37 comments
  • The Dish – 250 reads, 24 comments
  • There is a Road – 189 reads, 28 comments
  • WattNaNo’s Top Picks 2018 – 1,947+ reads, 45+ comments
  • WattNaNo’s Top Picks 2019 – 1,814+ reads, 10+ comments
  • What Now? – 2,661+ reads, 104+ comments

More Published Works

Also, I am amassing quite the collection of published works!

Untrustworthy, which is my first published novel. So yay!

A True Believer in Skepticism, published in Mythic Magazine.

Almost Shipwrecked, a story in the January 2019 edition of Empyreome (link no longer works, alas!).

Canaries, a short story in the March 29, 2019, edition of Theme of Absence.

Complications, a story in the Queer Sci Fi Discovery anthology. So this is an anthology where the proceeds went to supporting the QSF website.

Cynthia and Wilder Bloom, stories in the Longest Night Watch II anthology.

Props, a story in the Longest Night Watch I anthology. So this is an anthology where the proceeds go to Alzheimer’s research.

Surprises, a story in Book One of the 42 and Beyond Anthology set.

The Boy in the Band, a story in the Pride Park anthology. So this is an anthology where the proceeds go to the Trevor Project.

The Interview, the featured story in the December 14, 2018 edition of Theme of Absence. So they even interviewed me!

The Last Patient, a story in the Stardust, Always anthology. This was an anthology where the proceeds go to cancer research.

The Resurrection of Ditte, a story in the Unrealpolitik anthology.

This is My Child, a short story published in the April 8, 2019 edition of Asymmetry Fiction.

Three Minutes Back in Time, a short story published in Mythic Magazine.

Killing Us Softly, a short story published in Corner Bar Magazine.

Darkness into Light, a short story published in Corner Bar Magazine.

WIP Corner

So my current WIPs are as follows:

The Obolonk Murders Trilogy – so this one is all about a tripartite society. But who’s killing the aliens?

The Enigman Cave – can we find life on another planet and not screw it up? You know, like we do everything else?

The Real Hub of the Universe Trilogy – so the aliens who live among us in the 1870s and 1880s are at war. But why is that?

Mettle – so it’s all about how society goes to hell in a hand basket when the metals of the periodic table start to disappear. But then what?

Time Addicts – No One is Safe – so this one is all about what happens in the future when time travel becomes possible via narcotic.

Time Addicts – Nothing is Permanent – this is the second in this trilogy. What happens when time is tampered with and manipulated in all sorts of ways? It’s the ultimate in gaslighting, for one thing.

Time Addicts – Everything is Up For Grabs – this is the third in this trilogy. When time is bent and shaped like a wire hanger or a lump of clay, Josie James is thrown around in just so much temporal turbulence. She’s the only one who remembers how things were before—or is she? Can she put any of it back before even she forgets the oldest timelines?

Prep Work

So currently, my intention, for this year’s NaNoWriMo, is that I am writing the third trilogy in the Time Addicts/Obolonks universe. But I need to iron out the plot! So a lot of this year has been spent on that. I have no name for this one yet.

Second Quarter 2022 Queries and Submissions

So here’s how that’s been going during second quarter 2022.

In Progress

As of Second Quarter 2022, nothing is still in the running for publishing.

All Other Statuses

So be sure to see the Stats section for some details on any query statuses for Second Quarter 2022 which were not in progress.

Stats

So in 2018, my querying stats were:

  • 68 submissions of 19 stories
  • Acceptances: 4, 5.88%
  • In Progress-Under Consideration: 3, 4.41% (so these don’t seem to have panned out)
  • In Progress: 10, 14.71%
  • Rejected-Personal: 14, 20.59%
  • Rejected-Form: 24, 35.29%
  • Ghosted: 13 (so these were submissions where I never found out what happened), 19.12%

So in 2019 my querying stats were:

  • 23 submissions of 11 stories (so 6 submissions carry over from 2018)
  • Acceptances: 4, 17.39%
  • In Progress: 11 (so this includes 2 holdovers from 2018), 47.83%
  • Rejected-Personal: 4, 17.39%
  • Rejected-Form: 3, 13.04%
  • Ghosted: 1 (so these are submissions where I never found out what happened), 4.35%

2020 Stats

So in 2020 my querying stats were:

  • 37 submissions of 12 stories (so 9 submissions carried over from 2019)
  • Acceptances: 3, 8.11%
  • In Progress: 7, 18.92%
  • Rejected-Personal: 12, 32.43%
  • Rejected-Form: 4, 10.81%
  • Ghosted: 11 (so these are submissions where I never found out what happened), 29.73%

2021 Stats

So in 2021 my querying stats were 5 submissions of 5 stories (so 5 submissions carried over from 2020), 100% ghosted.

2022 Stats

So in 2022 my querying stats are:

  • 6+ submissions of 6+ stories (so 5 submissions carry over from 2020 and 2021)
  • Rejected-Form: 1, 16.67%
  • Ghosted: 5 (so these are submissions where I never found out what happened), 83.33%

Not too terribly encouraging.

This Quarter’s Productivity Killers

So it’s work, what else? But there’s another issue. I am working on getting back into a writing group. Before the second quarter 2022 started, it seemed like my group would be disbanding. Which makes me sad. Why, oh why, can’t I find a group that I like, which works for me? But … I may have found someone … Stay tuned.

Other second quarters, like in 2020 and 2021, had more querying. Ah, well.

First quarter 2022, though, had very little. And so it goes.

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Transitioning from Fanfiction

A Look at Transitioning from Fanfiction

If you first wrote in someone else’s universe, and now you want to claim your own, you may be transitioning from fanfiction.

Transitioning from Fan Fiction Writing to Wholly Original Writing

It’s more than just ‘filing off a few serial numbers’. In particular, wholly obvious plot conventions and details may need to be nixed completely. Transporter room, anyone? Tatooine? Two brothers fighting demons? A bunch of sparkly vampires? Yeah, you get the idea. You’ll probably need to change any of those radically.

How Writing Fanfiction Can Help You

It teaches you how to follow continuity. And it can keep you writing when you’re stuck. Writing begets more writing (even fan fiction!). So it pays to keep going. You are better off, in terms of preventing writer’s block, to just keep on writing. Hence, if all else fails, go with fan fiction. Of course there are plenty of places to post it online. Here’s one.

How Writing Fanfiction Can Hurt You

The problem is, it does not teach you how to make your own world. Hence it can hamper your growth in this area. Furthermore, if you are not used to making your own characters, it can hurt you there, as well.

Flip Your Perception

So consider what the foundational IP (intellectual property) does, and why it matters to you as you start the process of transitioning.

  • Interesting stories – spend some time deconstructing your favorites. Where did the writers hand-wave a problem away? Also, where did they get confusing? In addition, where did they deliver on the promise of their teaser/preview?
  • Compelling characters – why do the canon characters matter to you? Again, engage in some deconstruction. Forget who plays a character. So consider how you would feel about a character if someone else played them. Furthermore, consider how you would feel if the character’s gender and/or sexuality were swapped. Would you feel different if the character was of a race different from the current actor’s? Be your own casting director. Who, living or dead, could play the role better?

More Ideas

  • Fascinating scenes – even within a familiar place, commercial intellectual property exists inside its own bucket. It might be a city block, a hospital, a car driving across the country, or somewhere else. But what would happen if the scene shifted? Does the work succeed if it moves from Milwaukee to San Diego to Angkor Wat?
  • Action-driving plots – what kicks things off? If it’s a television program, what happened during the pilot? Did someone new move in? Did someone lose their job? Attend their own wedding? Have a kid? Graduate? Get arrested? Would the storyline still work if the pilot was different?
  • Believable effects, makeup, costumes, lighting, scenery, etc. – technology is a part of onscreen fiction writing. New techniques are constantly being invented. This helps studios save money but also enhance believability. What happens if an older show or film gets new makeup and green screening? Does that help the story, or harm it?

Finish Transitioning Over and Blaze Your Own Trail

For every exciting intellectual property out there, whether it’s books, films, YouTube videos, TV programs, or something else, it all started somewhere.

So what is your story? Who are your characters?

Who knows? Maybe someday someone will want to write fan fiction about your work.

Transitioning from fanfiction is easier than other types of transitions. So try it!


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Character Review — Dr. Mei-Lin Quan

Dr. Quan, a Character Review

Where did Mei-Lin Quan come from?

I didn’t originally have much of a plan for her. She was a necessary character, because I did see Eleanor Braverman needing this kind of medical help. But unlike others such as Kitty and Mink, or Craig or Elise, Mei-Lin didn’t have too much of a voice to start.

A bit like Ixalla, I didn’t really start to understand her until I started writing her.

The Past is Prologue—Backstory for Dr. Quan

When we first see Mei-Lin, she’s packed and leaving Los Angeles, bound for Boston. One of her last acts in California is to write to her ex and tell him to quit bothering her, or else she’ll block him. But that’s most of what we (and I) know.

Characteristics

I wanted at least one character to be a bit overweight, so I essentially elected her to the task. Because the first seven or so chapters exist to foreshadow much of the rest of the story, her weight does the job admirably. For, who to better contrast with starving characters than an overweight one?

As I wrote her, I learned that she has a high voice, almost like a child’s. In addition, she gets lost easily, with virtually no sense of direction. Furthermore, her family is from Taiwan. And, at least one relative still calls that island Formosa. I also got to know that she had an ex, Chou.

And Chou wasn’t so happy with being her ex.

Purpose/Theme/Motivation: Dr. Quan at Work

There are four characters who I show at work. Five, I suppose, if you count Olga—and I suppose you should. I show Noah at the Boston Globe. And I show Elise working in the St. Botolph’s morgue. In addition, I show Craig working at NASA. And I show Olga caring for Eleanor. Now, the kids and Eleanor understandably do not have jobs.

But I show Mei-Lin at work more than anyone else but Craig. There are scenes of her getting to work, and starting and ending her day. Plus, I’ve got her seeing patients and even performing surgery. Mei-Lin Quan is, like any other orthopedic surgeon, busy.

Her motivation throughout the piece is to be a healing peacemaker. Unlike the other characters, she doesn’t toughen up much, not even at the end.

Portrayal

I came up with Japanese actress Keiko Kitigawa, and it was mainly due to the above image. But I am open to persuasion to change my mind and choose someone else. If American audiences know her at all, it’s from The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift. But I think it would be better to have an actress of Chinese extraction. I don’t know. Landi Li is too young (although I do like that she was born on my birthday!).

So, if you’ve got a better idea for a portrayal, let me know in the comments section, thanks.

Quotes

The door to the sedan opened, and out staggered a woman of Asian descent with red eyes and messed up hair that looked like she had been sleeping in the sedan for days. She had her purse with her, along with a plastic bag with the logo of St. Botolph’s printed on the side, and a small gym bag. She squinted at Elise. “Do I know you?”

“St. B’s, right?” asked Elise. It was as reasonable a question as any, considering the hospital was one of the few places Elise ever went where there ever were other people.

“Yeah, Orthopedics, Mei-Lin Quan. I think I gave you a ride home a week ago? Days ago? I can’t figure out what day it is.”

“I hear that. And yeah, I remember now. Elise Jeffries. This your car?”

“No. Mine’s in the lot up there, back at St. B’s, if it still is at all.”

“You mean someone stole it?”

“No, at least, hell, I have no idea.” Mei-Lin said, putting her gym bag down and rubbing the bridge of her nose in the cold. “More like wrecked it. There was, God, it was anarchy at the hospital.”

“Anarchy?”

Relationships

I have nearly nothing on Mei-Lin and Chou, save for her family pressuring her to marry him—and her refusal. But this will come when I write the prequel.

With Craig Firenze, she’s nervous and excited. They joke around but are also serious. They’re awkward and romantic, too.

Conflict and Turning Point

On what would normally have been a hot summer solstice, there’s a nor’easter. Mei-Lin (like a lot of other people during pressure drops) feels wonky all day. But hope returns when she looks at Craig.

Continuity/Easter Eggs

There really aren’t any Easter Eggs for this character.

Future Plans

Like with the other characters in Mettle, I don’t have any future plans for Mei-Lin beyond the prequel.

Dr. Mei-Lin Quan: Takeaways

This character turned from functional to essential as I wrote her. A lot like Ixalla!

Dr. Mei-Lin Quan — a character who found herself while I found her.


Want More of Mei-Lin and the Rest of Mettle?

If Mettle resonates with you, then check out my other articles about how changes in the periodic table nearly kill us all.

Character Reviews: Mettle

The Mettle Universe
Self Review: Mettle

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Scene Setting

A Look at Scene Setting in Writing

Don’t leave it to chance. Scene setting is important to know.

What is Scene Setting?

Basic scene setting is a fundamental skill which every writer needs to perfect. A scene is more or less a species of character. Your scene needs some care and attention—and description.

Let’s look at some ways to do it.

All the Old Familiar Places and Times

When your story takes place on Earth during the present day, you’re in luck! You can get away without going over basic information. Present-day Moscow has cars. Today in Paris, people use the metric system. Current day Kentucky has telephones.

So your really basic information is already there. Don’t waste time or pixels or reader good will by explaining any of that, unless it’s somehow important. E. g. if your Russian character was raised in the sticks, maybe they never saw a car before. If your Parisian is a transplant from the United States, she might occasionally forget that most countries use different systems for weights and measures.

And if your Kentuckian was deaf and now suddenly can hear (and also led a sheltered life) telephones might be odd things which now have a purpose they didn’t have before.

But even for a place found on Planet Earth which you think you know, you should still do some digging. And don’t just look at touristy sites! I live in Boston. It’s not all Faneuil Hall Marketplace, not by a long shot. By the way, here’s a public service announcement from me. Harvard University is in Cambridge, not Boston. And it is far from the only university in this city.

This helped to inform how I wrote Mettle. Present-day Boston has cell phones, triple decker buildings, and French fries. Just like pretty much every other present-day place does.

Familiar Place, Unfamiliar Time

Then there’s the scenario where your location is close or familiar. But the time is not now. So, what is it, the past or the future?

Forward into the Past

If it’s the past, then you need to do some research. Wikipedia is not a good final source, but it’s not a bad first one. What I mean is, you can start there, particularly if you are unsure about names or parameters. But then you need to branch out.

Hence if you are trying to determine whether there were gas lamps lighting the streets of Berlin in 1740, you might want to start with looking up gas lamps and moving on from there. If they were invented later, then that answers your question. But if they were invented earlier (I honestly don’t know), then you should be looking at other sources.

You can check footnotes, or just do some creative Googling. I have found The Library of Congress has some great old images. But you may need to spend some time looking, as not everything is logically labelled.

Scene Setting for The Real Hub of the Universe

This was the exact situation for the Real Hub… series. A lot of us think we know the Victorian Era. But we don’t necessarily. Queen Victoria reigned from 1837 to 1901. In the United States, this is a time frame from Presidents Martin Van Buren (the 8th person to hold the title) to William McKinley (the 25th). The sewing machine was invented in 1851.

In 1875, Edison applied for a patent for the light bulb. So, you can see that the time period encompasses a lot of changes. People from the first year of her reign wouldn’t recognize all the trappings of life from her reign’s last year.

One way I set the scene was to only use language which was in use at the time. Etymy Online has proven to be exceptionally valuable for this. One thing I learned is that the word faze was in use. Subtly avoiding anachronistic language helps with scene setting in the past.

Back to the Future

For the future, of course you can invent what you like (and I will get into that with another blog post). But it pays to do some research anyway. Get an idea of what’s coming. If, say, solar-powered belt buckles are being patented, then why not put them in your near-future story? However, if you are writing a deeper, later future, you might want to make them passé.

Scene Setting for the Obolonk Universe

In this universe, our planet is divided into several megalopolises. In between, Earth is mainly zoological parks, going back to the original savannas and steppes and the like it was before human habitation. The Boston Meg encompasses all of New England. Rio-Recife-Montevideo is on the eastern side of South America, and so on.

Familiar Times, Unfamiliar Places

For alien places, consider what it means if the gravity is stronger, or weaker. What happens if the atmosphere is thinner? One way to make things easier on you is to research similar locations. The Andes or the Himalayas could stand in for a planet with thinner air, for example.

Let’s Go Off-World

One way I set the scene in the Obolonks trilogy and its successor, the Time Addicts trilogy, was to adopt naming conventions. As a result, every town and landmark in the Jovian System comes from rock groups. Hence, Ankaville is the capital of Callisto. The names of famous women work for Venus.

Hence, Navratilovaville and Garland City. The naming conventions also helped tremendously when deciding on other things like the names of schools or sports teams.

One idea I got (which I love, if I do say so myself) was to decide that terraforming operations are smelly. Hence, every orb would have a signature smell. Is it pine, or a fireplace? Lemons or chestnuts?

Totally Alien

Consider not just the look, but what happens when you engage your other senses. Is the place hot? Smelly? Smoggy? Is the landscape muddy? Frozen? Sandy? Urban and loud? Do your characters have to climb? Cross rivers?

Scene Setting for Untrustworthy

For Untrustworthy, the people and the scene were both so utterly unfamiliar that I needed more familiar touchstones. This meant adding a central river which characters had to cross using bridges. It also meant creating a new form of going, the transportation sleigh. A reader even asked me if Caboss is a snowy world.

And I’m still not sure! But all these alien things have familiarity baked right in. We all know what sleighs and bridges are. This made it easier for a reader to connect to what went on in that book.

Scene Setting Takeaways

You can put the reader in the action by engaging multiple senses. Latch onto the familiar if you can. Analogize to give the reader a faster understanding of the place. Do the homework, even on the small almost throwaway scenes, so your readers won’t have to.

Scene setting is a vital skill for every writer. #amwriting


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Self-Review – The Real Hope of the Universe

Review – The Real Hope of the Universe

Hope was a huge theme in this book.

The Real Hope of the Universe picks where The Real Heart of the Universe left off. As the book to wrap up the trilogy, it had to resolve a number of subplots. So many subplots. Hence the first draft clocked in at over 185,000 words. Oh. My. God.

I didn’t need an editor. I needed a weed whacker.

Background

To wrap up the series, the aliens needed to leave our world. But how?

In addition, there were numerous subplots to resolve. For me, it can be hard to get all of that fixed and sewn up, tied neatly with a bow. This made for any number of issues with length. For after I wrote the first draft, my mission was to cut it by 50,000 words. The second draft (what I call a second draft is often what people call a fifth or a sixth draft) was about 48,500 words less. Much, much better, but still a bear.

Plot for The Real Hope of the Universe

When we first see Ceilidh, Devon, Shannon, and Jake, they are riding in a carriage in Scotland. It’s the 1880s, and there are strange things happening throughout the planet. Some of these odd occurrences happen due to alien intervention. But some of them happen because of what human beings do.

Unlike the other two books, I had to devote this one to far more science fiction. And so it is! Yet at the same time, I had to resolve the subplots. Hence I wrote meanderings to here and there. But as I ruthlessly slashed away at the first draft, I tied a lot more of the subplots’ resolutions to science fiction.

Characters

The characters are the main character, Ceilidh O’Malley. Also, her boyfriend (later husband) Jake Radford and her employer, Dr. Devon Grace. In addition, there is the colony known as Shannon Duffy and the members of a secret society. These include men from both North America and Europe.

Memorable Quotes from The Real Hope of the Universe

They stopped on the steps for a second. “If you wish to leave now, say so.”

“If you’ll have any family you can talk to at all in the future, it shall likely be Luke.”

“So it would seem we should stay and wait it all out. So at least there’s a fighting chance of pulling out the whole truth, and he gets my side of things.”

“Not your side, Jake. Our side.”

“Ours, then. You are my truest companion.” He smiled a little, but it wasn’t in his eyes, which darted to the left for a second. His hand on hers was damp with sweat.

“Coming, you coward?” John sneered. “Or will you stand on the stairs forever, like a mental defective?”

“John,” Ceilidh said, “Kindly don’t speak to us this way. You may have arguments with my husband. He and I are willing to hear them. But a schoolyard bully’s insults are beneath you.”

John was nonplussed, and seemed to be deciding if she’d insulted or praised him. “Just get in the library already.” The library was a dark room, paneled in oak, with more decorations than books in the shelves.

Rating

The story has a K+ rating. As this one has more Gothic elements to it, there are some occasional squicky moments. For anyone who enjoys reading Gothic tales, some of the scenes should be familiar.

Upshot

Because it was the end of the series, I struggled to let go. This is a normal pattern for me. It is quite literally nothing new. Hence the ending is dragged out far more than it ever needed to be.

When the first draft was done, it was the longest piece I had ever written. It took me about four and a half months to finish the first draft. And this was writing every day!

I hope I can write more in this universe! #amreviewing


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Self-Review – The Real Heart of the Universe

Review – The Real Heart of the Universe

The Real Heart of the Universe continues the main story. This sequel to The Real Hub of the Universe brings back Ceilidh O’Malley, Devon Grace, Shannon Duffy, and Jacob Radford, along with the Boston Brahmins in the 1880s. In this, the second novel in the trilogy, Ceilidh deals head on with the problems she left behind in Ireland.

The biggest of these is Johnny Barnes.

Background

The second book of a trilogy can sometimes feel like filler. The last time I wrote a trilogy, for The Obolonk Murders, the middle book ended up as a means of advancing the Peri-Dave romance. Hence I opted for a similar idea. Here, the Ceilidh-Jake romance would advance.

The Plot of the Real Heart of the Universe

But there are always complications. For Ceilidh, who is still married to Johnny at the start of the book, her dalliance with Jake is a sin. Will she lose her mortal soul? For someone brought up with faith, the idea of what is more or less adultery is quite the problem.

So, what is she to do?

Characters

The main character in the piece is (again) Ceilidh O’Malley Barnes. Her main mission in this novel is to find a way to be with her love, Jacob Radford. The scenes shift from the Lowell House in Boston to Providence, Rhode Island, and then to an Atlantic ocean voyage, and then to Ireland.

Memorable Quotes from the Real Heart of the Universe

He had chosen an impeccable charcoal gray suit, for his attire from the morning apparently would no longer do. He had all of his ties strewn around on his bed when she returned after getting the luncheon dishes back to the kitchen and cleaning them. “Have you a soirée?” she asked.

“Not so much a soirée,” he paused for a moment, rolling the R with his Scottish brogue, “as an invitation to tea. Sorry for the change in plans; I had meant to tell you, but your initiation into SPHERE got in the way. Hand me that one, if you please.”

“This one?” she asked, holding up his navy blue tie.

“No, no, the tartan.”

“Oh? So you’re going to regale your companion with tales of the Grace family?”

“The Argylls, actually. We go further back than William the Conqueror and all that rot.” He positioned himself in front of the room’s full-length looking glass and tied the tie, which was bright blue and green, with hints of purple and black. “There.”

She approached and straightened his tie a little and then smoothed his light gray hair back a little with two of her fingers. “Handsome and very approachable, sir.”

He smiled slightly. “Hopefully such will be the effect. The approachable part, that is. Handsome? In all honesty, Ceilidh, you should be fitted for spectacles at this rate.”

Rating

The book has a K+ rating. For the most part, it is pleasant. But there is some violence. Language is mild.

Upshot for the Real Heart of the Universe

So I think this one works rather well as a bridge story between introducing the storyline and then ending it.

One of the biggest issues with this series is the need for more science fiction in it. As it is, often the series can feel like a historical novel with some science fiction thrown into it. Yet one thing I need to do is describe Ceilidh’s life and world, as they just aren’t as well-known as readers may think.

The Victorian era may be interesting to people, but it doesn’t mean they know too much about it. So some of my writing has been to deal head on with any misconceptions.

The real heart of the universe is Ceilidh herself. #amreviewing


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